Filed Under: Jana Cova

September 2013 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

9/28/13

Makeup sex can be really great. We all know that, right? Of course getting to actually have sex by way of apology would probably be better than getting to merely watch sex, but even as technologically advanced as we are around here, we have not quite mastered the “transporter” option for the web site. We do, however, have Asia Carrera to help you along with whatever journey you (two or three or) choose to take. All in all, it’s probably for the best we cannot offer that “’in person” option. Asia would get really, really tired. [STAR TAGS: Asia Carrera Video]

Riding a Turbo Carrera
9/25/13

Maverick has a birthday today, although considering how these updates play “in history” so to speak, it may not technically be “today” when you read this. Consequently, should you ever have the inkling to wish Maverick a Happy Birthday, you just need to do so on September 25th. Mav happens to be a quite kind chap, and thus he celebrates his birthday on the same day every year. For our part, we try to memorialize this date the same way every year too: Kristal Summers. He seems to appreciate it. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers]

Kristal Summers
9/23/13

When a good friend suffers a loss — even if you happen to think it’s completely ridiculous, because it’s only a game, and your friend wasn’t even playing the game personally — you do what you can to remind them of happier times. So today, as a bunch of regular working people in Wisconsin feel lousy about a bunch of highly paid people in Wisconsin, we chose to remind Uncle Gibby about Exxxotica Chicago this year. Cheer up, dear friend: At least we didn’t send you boner pills. [STAR TAGS: Stormy Daniels, Alexis Texas, Kristina Rose, Britney Amber, Jayden Jaymes, Jayden Cole, Lexi Belle, Exxxotica Chicago Exclusive Video]

Lexi. We Love that Belle.
9/19/13

None of us has been willing to go on record regarding D.Minion’s organizational mania at the new office, but we will point out that we now have a label on a shelf that reads “Label Maker.” Of course being given DM’s persona in a regular work environment will allow others to think outside the box — as it were — regarding important things like how we might improve cheerleaders, and how we might please Gibby at least half the time, just like the 1-1 Green Bay Packers. [STAR TAGS: Anais Video, Jana Cova Video, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Michelle Michaels Video, Michael Ninn]

TWO Stunning Blondes
9/14/13

Well we survived another Friday the 13th again, although truth be told when the dude in charge goes by the name “Lucky” those tend to be sort of party days around here anyway. Of course the REAL truth be told, one could pretty much apply that description to pretty much any of our days. Although technically this update applies most directly to questions via the “Free Side” of risqué, we can’t really answer them without some of the uncensored aspects of the Membership Side, so we decided to throw a party to celebrate our cleverness. You’ll actually find us fairly shameless when it comes to party excuses, and we don’t even care that much about accuracy. [STAR TAGS: Dee Exclusive Video, Kylie Ireland Video]

Under Dee Water
9/11/13

Not many people give much thought to the term bittersweet anymore, but for the last dozen years, Americans have been able to put that term to September 11th. As a nation we’re certainly a lot stronger and safer than we were before that date, but the progress came at a terrible cost. Retrospect has a way of bringing up mixed emotions, which we can happily avoid simply by looking at Kaylan Nicole … and Cytherea … and Shayla LaVeaux. All things considered, life can be pretty good around here. Oddly enough, most of our memories are not too painful to remember. … [STAR TAGS: Kaylan Nicole Video, Shayla LaVeaux Audio, Cytherea]

A Beauty Within, as it were  …
9/7/13

Have you heard the famous line, “Seven in One Blow!” somewhere along the line? Now it could refer to a particularly accurate fellow with a fly swatter. It could also be talking about an element in any number of gang bang movies. Of course now all the truly erudite will understand that the sentence refers to the opening game Peyton Manning had in the 2013 NFL season. Of course this only becomes important for the “non-erudite” when taken as an example of how sometimes people can interpret things in different ways. … It doesn’t make them wrong so much as … OK … It makes them wrong. [STAR TAGS: Anais, Jana Cova Video, Michael Ninn]

Nothing Wrong with Anais
9/5/13

Depending upon what day you happen to be looking at this, the date at the side here might be confusing. But worry not: today is in fact September 5th. You see D.Minion had carefully planned out her Intimate Encounters 3 coverage to hit on consecutive Denver Bronco games under the odd assumption that not all people care about such things. Sadly, D.Minion failed to comprehend the difference between preseason and the regular season in the NFL. Worry not, however. We fixed it. No matter what your calendar says, don’t panic. Of course “tomorrow” might be September 5th too, but soon it won’t matter in the slightest — well, except for the loser of the game … on September 5th. [STAR TAGS: Sophia Knight Exclusive Video, Breanne Benson Exclusive Video, Jeanie Marie Sullivan]

Sophia Knight
9/1/13

Kristal Summers has a birthday on this date. This one happens to be special, however, as after much research we have determined that it will be the only one in 2013, so that deserves a celebration. Of course only Maverick could decide that having Kristal dress up in a latex nurse outfit for him qualifies as a birthday celebration for her, but those Brits … . What’re ya gonna do? … At least Mav contributes to the cause with his “Nurse Sandie” U.K. version, and that helped. Next year, though, we’re all lobbying for Mav to bring Nurse Sandie TO Nurse Kristal. THAT sounds like a party. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers, Sandie Caine Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]

Nurse of the Sandie Variety

August 2012 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

8/31/12

All of us get used to a certain amount of unfairness in life, otherwise we could never watch young people eat like it will be their last meal without slapping them every time they picked up a napkin. A half dozen Krispy Kremes, you say? You’d like a double bacon cheeseburger with extra-large fries, and yet you’ll remain annoyingly thin? … SLAP! … Of course unfairness in life does not limit itself to caloric intake, but it always seems to surprise us when it comes from family. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers, Shayla LaVeaux Video]

Kristal Summers and some dude. But we’re not bitter or anything.
8/26/12

Mysteries of the concept of “Lost and Found” bear fruit today, while fully-ripened friends, Jana Cova and Isabella bare … well, other things. Of course certain of their parts bear a distinct resemblance, when bare, to certain fruits, so that could possibly tie this all together in a (freshness) pinch. Basically we have decided to simply follow ancient advice: Be fruitful and multiply, or at least practice the multiplying part. (OK. So these are both women, obviously, and the whole multiplying part really won’t work no matter how hard they try, but how far does one really need to take a metaphor on an adult site, really?) [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Cova Video, Isabella Video]

Isabella & Jana: Blended Beauties
8/22/12

Generally when someone talks about a thing being “rock hard” in this business, odds would be good that they do not refer to actual rocks — you know, really solid chunks of the earth, broken off into pieces suitable for throwing at someone you catch using their “rock hard” part in an inappropriate manner. … In our case, however, sometimes we really do happen to be talking about rocks, in this case with petroglyphs displayed on them. Of course in this particular circumstance we utilize the liquid talents of Cytherea to demonstrate our solid reasoning, so we’re reasonably certain not to get fired because of the effort. We will stop and send you off to your adventures today before we blow it by trying to extend a metaphor too far, but just so you know: A cigar is never just a cigar in this place. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video]

All in All, Cytherea is Much Prettier
8/18/12

Some things in life we still do not understand. One of the byproducts of the Olympic coverage on television — at least in Southern California — included a massive run of new commercials for Honda. Now we admit that all of us over a certain young age have heard commercials featuring sound tracks that made us just a little sad. Most of us in this office, for example, were just getting used to Steppenwolf hocking insurance when the new Honda advertisements hit the air. As near as we can tell, no one told any of the Honda executives what Judas Priest stood for back in the day. But at least they were a British band, so that maybe counts for something during the London Olympics. On a completely unrelated note of confusion, Kristal Summers opens for a Pearl of a Shayla LaVeaux post with another round of “Wrestling Boys” today. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers, Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video]

He's Got Another Thing Coming
8/13/12

Except for the fact that everyone now has to start getting out of bed “early” again, the risqué commune offices have quite the celebration going on — interestingly beginning immediately after the Closing Ceremonies concluded. Clearly not everyone shares the feelings of universal fellowship that watching highly dedicated and gifted individuals either succeed or fail spectacularly can bring. All in all, none of us mind that when we screw up in a really major fashion somewhat fewer than 4 billion people drop by to share in the experience. None of us mind Maverick’s confusion on which celebratory event he has Natalia Forrest representing either. By the way, if 4 billion of you do want to join and watch her, we would be fine with that. [FEATURED TAGS: Alexis Ford, Brooklyn Lee, Missy Martinez Video, Zoey Holloway Video, Natalia Forrest Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars]

Natalia. Closing. Opening. Whatever.
8/10/12

Although we did not know it until learning a bit of “Brit” over these Olympics, apparently we regularly strive to avoid things going sixes and sevens at risqué. Also we have remembered that we need to tell the new Photoshop boss that despite what D.Minion may assert, there is in fact such a thing as too many puppy pictures. On the upside, DM and her ChickaDees took over 200 photos NOT of small domestic animals on the Dallas XXX, Day Three set. You may well find those more interesting. [FEATURED TAGS: Brooklyn Lee Exclusive Video, Bobbi Starr, Alexis Ford]

Dang, have we been there.
8/6/12

The Brits had quite a resurgence in the Olympic games over the weekend, leading in our case to a bevy of “In your FACE, DM!” sorts of emails traveling across the ocean in this direction. While as a group we obviously enjoy a fine, good-natured competitive ribbing amongst ourselves, we Americans really had to admire how polite the British have turned out to be. Maybe you have not noticed, but instead of their own national anthem, every time a British citizen wins a gold medal they insist upon listening to a heart-warming rendition of My Country ’Tis of Thee. You know, maybe they have forgiven us for that whole Revolutionary War thing. … Toward a similar end, Inari Vachs and Cytherea help us with an other-parts-warming exhibition today. God Save the Queens. [FEATURED TAGS: Inari Vachs, Cytherea]

Just the Inari part of our warming up exercises.
8/4/12

Most of us have probably heard New Jersey referred to as “The Garden State” — although if you have only flown in and out of there, or seen the state on television, you might have trouble understanding how in the world they ever came up with that motto, seeing as how most people do not associate a peaceful communing with nature and New Jersey. Regardless, as it turns out, England has a Garden State too, and Maverick introduces us to one of its finest natural resources today. Then we throw in a bit of “Garden” a la Michael Ninn, simply as a helpful counterpoint. We will tell you this much from the outset, however: We don’t exactly get “peaceful” out of these either. “Pieceful” perhaps …. [FEATURED TAGS: Tori Black, Rayveness Video, Anais Video, Crystal Coxxx, 247AdultStars.com, Michael Ninn]

Tori Black. Also “Pieceful” …
8/2/12

Never having seen a water polo match in her life, D.Minion and her “ChickaDees” nevertheless spent a significant part of today watching a contest between the U.S. and the U.K., happily shouting, “In your FACE, Mav!” every time the Americans scored. While this may not say much for sportsmanship here in the office, it does say a bit regarding loyalty. For example, we welcome in a new (typically unnamed) Team Risqué member today, while noting the fine Pearls of Wisdom provided by Shayla LaVeaux. … If nothing else we do remain a loyal group, as D.Minion’s Minions still call themselves ChickaDees even though Dee has been retired going on six years now. Our new fellow has much to look forward to — or maybe much to fear. One can never tell. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Julia Ann]

See how wise the Pearls are?

December 2010 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

12/31/10

At this point we’ve pretty much given up on Business as Usual around here, as everyone has pretty much fallen into the Full Panic mode about the upcoming convention. When we decided to put that Countdown for Gibby on top of New Stuff, we didn’t really anticipate that this would result in common wails of AAAARGH! in the office – every time somebody here opens up the site to check something. Presuming we haven’t been overrun by a collection of pirates, one might assume that the old “Ignorance is Bliss” theory definitely seems to hold water in this establishment. Of course, since we’re almost always happy here, that should give us reason to worry, right? … We’ll think about that, and y’all enjoy Bullet Points from DM. [FEATURED TAGS: AEE 2010, Rayveness, Nicki Hunter, Christy Canyon, Raylene, Ginger Lynn, Veronica Hart, Jessica Drake, Monique Alexander, Eva Angelina, Julia Ann, Sasha Grey, Jesse Jane, Nina Hartley, Chloe, Sunset Thomas, Exclusive Video]

Get Real. Really?
12/27/10

You know how it feels when you get the opportunity to hang out with a friend that you’ve had for going on 20 years? Well, that’s how we’ve been enjoying for the past few months as we’ve all been showing off what we can do for just such a friend, Shayla LaVeaux. Today happens to be Shayla’s birthday, and today also happens to mark the launch of Shayla’s brand new personal web site. Members here get that access for FREE, and all of Shayla’s members will also get to hang with the rest of us for the same price. We’ve had a saying around here that we’ve used for years: “Things tend to work out.” … Happy Birthday, pretty lady. We love you. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux]

Shayla Preparing to Reveal – An Excellent Day
12/25/10

Sometimes simple works best: Merry Christmas. [FEATURED TAGS: Merry Christmas!]

Appropriate Christmas Ornaments
12/24/10

Don’t you just love presents? In the long list of quirks resulting in social deficiency that we possess around here, not being Politically Correct doesn’t even make the Top 40 list in all probability. Consequently, we feel quite comfortable just saying “Have a Holly, Jolly Christmas” and offering up another collection of gifts that you really shouldn’t share in just your basic family gathering. On the other hand, it does make us feel quite good to be able to offer this to the Members, and if that makes us odd, well, we weird people need love too. [FEATURED TAGS: Justine Joli, Anais, Georgia Adair, Jana Cova, Angel Cassidy, Charlie Lane, Jassie, Moni Michaels, Melissa Lauren, Audrey Hollander, Brittney Skye, Marie Luv, Daisy Marie, Heather Vuur, Heather Vandeven, Rita Faltoyano, Michael Ninn]

Nice Things to find Under Your Tree
12/22/10

It’s … a Poetry, Nudity, Gala (Oh, My!) … And for what it’s worth, we’ve never heard tell of Cytherea actually appearing in a home having magically come down the chimney, but we can assure you that she’d be welcome most anywhere we suspect. At the very least she provides a lot of decorative value to the area, regardless of the season. And while we make no claim to Shakespearean aspirations around here, we can do a dandy bit with the Limerick. If you have the time to wander through, you might even enjoy the poetic license. If you just have time to gaze at Cytherea, you’ll definitely enjoy her license to thrill. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea]

What Santa Wishes for at the Bottom of the Chimney
12/20/10

Did you know that even porn stars can get jealous when “their” man participates in a scene? Well, strange as it may seem normal human emotions don’t completely abandon a woman just because she’s decided on this rather atypical career choice. On the other hand, even in the presence of these feelings the guy usually gets to escape with all his limbs intact – even if not so much his breath. … If any of you folks out there ever find yourself in this unusual situation, take some advice from someone who’s seen it a lot: Walk away clean, and whatever you do, don’t brag too much. Shayla LaVeaux, Olivia Del Rio, and Anthony demonstrate a point (or two) this time around. That’s handy. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Olivia Del Rio]

Olivia, of the River and the Angels
12/17/10

If you live long enough, you’ll get an opportunity to use the word “redact” in a sentence. Actually, if you happen to work for one of the various “critical” agencies for the U.S. Government, you’ll probably get to use that word all the time — generally in response to the bellows of all those pesky But The First Amendment is Important! people. On the upside, we use bellows a whole lot more than we use gallows these days, so that seems like progress. [FEATURED TAGS: Sunny Lane, Kimberly Kane, Evan Stone, Erica McLean, Kaz B. Exclusive Video, 247adultstars.com]

We Wonder as She Wonders ... Festive, Aren't We?
12/13/10

Think about “C’mon Baby Light My Fire” … And if you know anything at all about Cytherea’s “speciality” in her adult performances, you know that if she did in fact light your fire, she could at least put it out all by herself. If you don’t happen to know what we’re talking about with Cytherea, well, you certainly will after a careful perusal of today’s video example. If you don’t understand “C’mon Baby Light My Fire” at all, just check YouTube. You’ll figure it out. And once reaching the video clips, if you wonder why someone in our Video Department went to all the trouble to create the complicated blueprint graphics as the background for the little introductions, we can explain that easily here too. Upon questioning we learned that this resulted from the simple fact that “Cytherea wrote the blueprints on this type of scene.” In addition to Web Geeks, Video Dudes also think they’re funny. … On the upside, you’ll even understand the Classic 60’s song reference at the end of DM’s story too. It’s fun around here. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Video, Taylor Hayes Video]

Fire in the Hole
12/10/10

Have you ever had a party with a bunch of porn stars and all of the sudden they all decided to pile on each other and pose for naked pictures? … OK. So probably not, but there are a great many worse ways to spend an evening in life. So we decided to look at a life of one of those stars today, and then illustrate her adorned with Devinn Lane, Kristal Summers, Dee, and Wendy Divine. That’s a heck of a good way to be adorned, just so you know. [FEATURED TAGS:Kristal Summers, Dee, Wendy Divine, Devinn Lane, Jessica Drake, Cheyenne Silver]

Party with the Porn Stars
12/7/10

The more philosophically positive around here try to remember today for a different reason than history aficionados. Today, of course, happens to be Chasey Lain’s birthday. Naturally we have always wished the best for Chasey, and she’s (by all accounts, including her own) doing well. She’s actually talking about learning some web design techniques, which would make her a certainly entertaining person around the office. Consequently we’re doing some celebration of our own around here today, and giving a public vote of confidence for another lass that has had career hiccups – albeit those being of a substantially less physically risky than Chasey’s past. As D.Minion says, “We just want everyone to be happy.” [FEATURED TAGS: Capri Anderson, Chasey Lane Video, Isabella Video, Daisy Marie Video]

Happy Birthday Chasey
12/2/10

Each of us brings a unique perspective to life, well, unless you happen to be one of those lacky “Dear God, Don’t Let Me Lose My Job” types in Washington, D.C. of course. Of course gradations of “unique” come into play, and both D.Minion and Sunny Lane certainly represent Whos of Different Hues if you want to look at it that way. Put them both in a Las Vegas hotel room, and you can imagine where the conversation (to say the least) will go. Since we’ve now started serious planning for the upcoming Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas, this little soirée seemed the perfect beginning. One thing about Vegas with a boatload of porn stars, you can find soirées out the ying-yang. … There’s another title in there somewhere. [FEATURED TAGS: Sunny Lane Exclusive Video, Alexis Texas Exclusive Video, Veronica Hart]

Sunny in Full Soiree

June 2010 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

6/30/10

You know how comfortable old friends can be? When they happen to look like Shayla LaVeaux, and they happen to have Shayla’s decided openness about nudity in general, well, they make darn good house guests too. Of course Shayla happens to be much more than a pretty face, and she has some dandy ideas about excellent travel arrangements, as we learn today. She’s even gotten into the spirit of our liaison with our British bud Maverick, although we’d be willing to bet she’s going to win the flirting contest with pretty much anyone named “Lexi” that you’re likely to run across. As long as we get to watch, though, we don’t really care who wins. (Hey, sorry about that Mav.) [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Phoenix Ray, Evan Stone]

Shayla with Phoenix Ray, Sadly not at Our House
6/26/10

Oops! We’ve mentioned this before, but we really hold to the opinion that you should never let the boss at your place of employment actually do any important work. It’s just going to get messed up, either because they haven’t done this particular task for years, or (in a technology field like ours) they may well have never known how to do it in the first place. Consequently we’re putting up the picture set courtesy of Michael Ninn’s wonderful skills at still photography today, that actually should have gone with the story a couple of days ago. We suppose it’s nice that somebody noticed, and we do appreciate all those (occasionally annoying) “silver lining” people around here, but for their benefit, we felt obliged to close with this little bit of wisdom we’ve acquired over the years: When you wake up seemingly stuck in life’s same ol’ thing circle, you should never forget that not everyone who shows up is there to help you. [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Jordan, Jana Cova, Georgia Jones, Faye Reagan, Karlie Montana, Jennifer Dark, Michael Ninn]

The Breast We Can Do
6/24/10

Here’s something we learned this week: Hockey introduced the first testicular guard, the Cup, in 1874. The first helmet showed up in use in 1974. Consequently, this means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important. That kind of adds a little perspective to evolution, doesn’t it? Speaking of evolution, that concept as it pertains to the personal relationships of porn stars actually mirrors the lives of the rest of us mere mortals more than you might think. Theoretically we’re continuing our analysis of the issue, this time benefited by “The Janas – Jordan and Cova” – not so much because they’re vital to the illustration as because they’re just really darned beautiful. One needs standards in life. And one needs to be able to define the logic behind those standards as one sees fit. [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Cova Video, Jana Jordan Video, Michael Ninn]

A Leg Up on the Competition ... (sorry)
6/20/10

Most of us really hate doing something over again. Of course most of the time we don’t have Wendy Divine offering up some very good reasons to do so. We won’t belabor a rather mundane web coding point here, but if you want to read about how this all came about you can certainly do so. Of course if you just want to see the 225 rather impressive pictures of Wendy enjoying herself with Nick Manning, well that’s fine too. For what it’s worth, Nick seemed to be doing certain things over and over again, and he seemed fine with the concept. It’s really wonderful to make Wendy smile, actually. That’s probably what Nick was after. [FEATURED TAGS: Wendy Divine, Nick Manning]

Waiting with Wendy, and Worth the Wait
6/18/10

Do you want to start an interesting conversation tonight? As you’re sitting down with your Significant Other to eat dinner, just try out this sentence and see where the conversation takes you: “So, if you had a clone, and I had sex with the clone, would that be cheating, since the clone is by definition an exact copy of you?” … OR … If you prefer to actually eat your food, as compared to wearing it, you might talk about the wonderful insights on Georgia Jones that you derived from the risque.com Members’ Area today. … OR … Maybe not. … This all comes down to how understanding your Significant Other happens to be, and doesn’t that just about sum up life perfectly? [FEATURED TAGS: Georgia Jones Video, Michael Ninn]

And Then Along Came Jones
6/13/10

Apparently at least the East Coast newspapers haven’t learned a whole lot in the last 230+ years. It wasn’t exactly Bunker Hill, but when U.S. and England tied in a soccer match yesterday, the coverage in that part of the country celebrated like we’d actually won the contest. Fortunately we devote absolutely no time whatsoever trying to figure out why that might be as we instead delve into the “Bonus Evolution” of our own special Brit. … Seriously, we’re probably way too American to understand why people seem to get this excited about the World Cup anyway. It’s not like they’re playing football or anything. [FEATURED TAGS: AdultStars247, AVN Awards, AEE, Faye Reagan, Sasha Grey, Lexi Love, Exclusive Video]

Mystery Women in Repose
6/10/10

Brandy. What a fine girl. In fact, what a good wife she would be. But D.Minion’s life, her love, her lady, is Marie. … Some days are just like this around here, and while we could apologize for the occasional pun and references to very old songs, it wouldn’t make them any less painful. Members have learned to either forgive or ignore us; we’ve never been quite sure which. … And if other adult sites don’t work in this fashion, well, We pity the fools. [FEATURED TAGS: Brandy]

A fine girl by any other name ...
6/7/10

If you look around and you notice a bride having sex with the groom and a priest in one room, and a couple of basically naked women cutting the heart out of a guy in another room, you’re either at a Kylie Ireland movie or one of our office parties. … OK. So we’ve never really killed anyone at an office party, but we did see what transpires when someone gives Kylie “artistic control” of certain parts of a movie, and then asks her to direct as well. … She ends up casting herself as the bride … and then that other stuff we just talked about happens. We call it A White (Trash) Wedding, because that’s the way we are. [FEATURED TAGS: Kylie Ireland]

A Bride Walks Into This Bar ...
6/3/10

What could possibly possess someone to travel to the middle of the some Fates-Forsaken desert in 100-degree heat? OK. So thirteen beautiful porn stars hanging around a swimming pool wearing itty-bitty bikinis might do it. … But not much else could, right? … Fortunately for us, we’re going with the thirteen beautiful porn stars scenario, and today we’re letting you in a little bit about how this all came about. We’re also packing sun screen and looking up on the internet how to fake sunstroke. Do you think porn stars give mouth-to-mouth if you have sunstroke? How about a hurt leg? … We can limp. [FEATURED TAGS: Monique Alexander Video, Belladonna Video, Stormy Daniels Video, Exclusive Video]

Monique Alexander. We feel faint.