Dee

Dee Faux Gets

Dancing with Dee Star(s)

by D.Minion

Kristal Summers and Dee - Friends in Faux PlacesDue to circumstances beyond my control, I’d missed Dee’s first two dance gigs in Downtown L.A. There was no way I was going to miss her finale! [It doesn’t matter, because Dee Faux Gets, remember? But for the record, there was also no way we were going to stand in the way this time, just to be clear.] I arrived at Dee’s house in time to watch her do her makeup and get her merchandise together (and play with her puppy Dasha). Then Dee, her guy Brandon, and I were off! [Think “Keystone Kops” and you’ll have a pretty good idea of how this sort of venture actually begins. If you’re too young to have ever heard of the Keystone Kops, well, then, you’re probably too young to have ever seen this word written down either: FAUGH!]

Feature dance dressing rooms are weird. Dee’s previous one was a bathroom. The one before was so small that three people couldn’t sit comfortably. This one was literally outside the club, and from the outside it looked remarkably like a large trash bin. [There’s a club called “T’s Lounge” in West Palm Beach, Florida that has another building across the parking lot which houses the Feature while she’s working at the club. Of course this place more resembles a small house than a trash bin, so that’s nice. It has a kitchen, a living room, a laundry room, and a couple of bedrooms, as I recall. Also (at least back in the day), T’s gave us free rum runners, and all of the house dancers knew that too, so they tended to hang out over at the Feature Room with some regularity. This always turned out to be rather nice also, as a matter of fact. Shayla once had a gig there for a week, and since they had no Feature Dancer scheduled for the following week, we ended up staying a few extra days. … These folks were quite the hospitable bunch; I’ll say that for them. … And I think we’ll just leave it at that. (If you happen to see Shayla in person sometime, though, ask her about our visit to T’s Lounge. I’ll bet you she blushes.)]

Kristal Summers (AKA The World’s Sexiest Roadie) arrived, and we ordered in dinner. Then we played Scrabble while Dee finished her makeup and got dressed. (Yeah, porn people are wild and crazy!) [Sadly, they always seem to prefer Scrabble or Jenga to Naked Twister, but this has never kept me from suggesting the latter. Regularly.]

Dee’s first outfit was her schoolgirl uniform. I love that one, and apparently so do a lot of people! When Dee was selling merchandise after her routine, a prince asked if she’d give him a lap dance! (At least he said he was a prince. He sure looked like one!) Dee not only lap danced the prince, she lap danced his entire entourage, including one rather shy, terrified, but happy young man! [Here’s a tip for all you aspiring dancers out there: If you get a group of guys together, all you have to do is pick out the one the other guys like to tease. Then you need only dance for that one guy, who’s invariably way too shy to be much of a problem, drunk or not, and all of his “friends” will keep tipping you, just to see you torment the shy one. … Aren’t drunk guys great?]

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