Nooner

A Nooner to Write Home About

Dee and Marcus suggested massages, mutual masturbation, foreplay, and bondage play as safe sex alternatives. [Adam & Eve sponsored a Sex Survey that they’ve given us access to, which you’ll see at some point after Cytherea launches. That study claims there are 41 “types” of sex, which clearly can’t be right, since 42 is the answer to Life, The Universe, and Everything. … We’ll call them before we run our editorial. Don’t worry.] They also promoted condoms and HIV testing. I’m sorry I’d missed the previous show where they had demonstrated dental dams. Apparently, Dee was not familiar with them. (I was! Night Calls has had “Safe Sex” shows for years!) [I always thought that they call them that because once you see how it works your first thought is, “I’m not using that damn thing,” but I’m old. Let’s look at some pictures of Dee and stop thinking about the need for plastic wrap being needed in the bedroom these days. How sad. … ]

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Since it seemed to be “Midget Day,” a caller told the duo that he had a midget girlfriend. He loved to pick her up, hold her upside-down, and get a blowjob! [Well, it would also keep the plastic wrap from slipping off too. That would be handy.]

A clip from Skate Trixxx, not starring Dee, but starring Little Person Pancho satisfied the Midget movie quota for that half hour. [Gee. Who even knew that we had such a thing. … More pics of Dee. Got it.]

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When it was time for Marcus to don his condom, he plugged www.condomania.com. You can even download a measuring tool from the site to order a perfect sized rubber! Marcus said later that those were the most comfortable condoms he’s ever used! (I checked out the site, and it’s amazing! You can even get dental dams there!) [Even more amazing might be the fact that the site still operates and you can still buy dental dams there. Take a look at those if you’re brave. If that doesn’t put you out of the mood, you’re a braver person than I. Given a choice, you’d probably rather just have a sandwich, all things considered.]

Even More Risque:  "Piloting" X360 — part two

After another Bridgette Powerz clip it was time to go. But not before Dee grabbed some bacon from craft services! Food and sex; what could be better! Have fun, but remember to be extra careful out there! [True to our “Happy Birthday Juli” New Stuff Promise we do have an entire bonus section of Juli Ashton photos not taken near a dam at all. Now Juli’s been gone for some time, but she’s still an amazing person, and we do feel obligated to keep new photos circulating every once in awhile. If nothing else, it makes Carol sit up and take notice. Now two of these pictures are of Juli, and the other was a remaining Dee shot from D.Minion’s day on set with her. If you can’t tell them apart, well, maybe your dental dam got stuck on your face.]

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