But the Penny I watched on TV was different from the one I’d met on set. First off, she returned to her civilian name, Jennie Ketcham. Next, Jennie wasn’t dressed up to film porn scenes. She wore comfortable clothes and didn’t even bother with makeup. [So she was on TV with no makeup at all, or just not porn makeup? … Nobody goes on camera with “no” makeup, not even politicians, and that includes the men. … Hmm. Our cynical nature seems hard to reign in today.] While Penny would joke around on set, Jennie was introspective – attending meetings, writing in her journal, and participating fully in all the treatments available to her. [This all seems overly-complicated. Penny just needs to meet a couple of the guys from my Freshman dorm. She’d swear off sex forever. No amount of fun could possibly be worth that … .]
Of course, there were similarities between “Private” Jennie and “Public” Penny. Both the woman and the character were warm and sensitive, intelligent and clever. Both gave 110% to everything they did. And even without the porn accoutrement, Jennie’s natural beauty shone through! [Of course! Maybe that’s why I’ve never been good with women. I need more accoutrement.]
Seven months after leaving rehab, Jennifer Ketcham appeared on Oprah. She was doing fine, still celibate, and hadn’t even “cheated” by masturbating. (Wow.) [Oh, dear. If masturbating is cheating I’m going to be in detention for … basically eternity, I figure. How can Oprah even dare to allow a topic that claims that masturbation is somehow bad? … OK. So I’ve never actually seen Oprah, but I hear she’s really influential, so that seems wrong. Personally, I’m not buying any of this, but we’re just supposed to write what we think around here, so I will do just that.]
Jennie didn’t trash the porn business with Oprah. She even mentioned that she continues to direct her own line of Sex Education movies. She doesn’t hate sex and the porn industry; she just can’t work in front of the camera anymore. (I’ve got issues when porn stars tear down the industry that made them rich and famous.) [Uh-Huh. And Penny’s the first woman in the history of the adult business that ever worked for a few years and then found it much more difficult to get bookings? Not meaning to imply that this turn of events wouldn’t be extremely depressing, particularly given the nature of what these women are willing to do for money, but having a “public” breakdown really doesn’t seem like the best way to handle a real problem.]
Somehow I was heartened when I saw Jennie/Penny briefly at the AVN Awards this year. She looked beautiful, happy, and content. I’ll miss Penny, but she’s alive and well in hundreds of hot scenes. And hopefully, when Jennie is ready, she can recapture a bit of Penny in her love life. [Worry not, DM. When Jennie (slash) Penny is “ready” it’ll take about a millisecond for her to find a willing companion to help her rediscover her inner passion. If you’re an alcoholic, you stop drinking booze, you don’t stop drinking everything. Have I missed something important?]
And by the way, if Jennie/Penny ever reads this, maybe she can introduce me to Dr. Drew. I’d love to have a very sexually healthy three-way with him and his hot tech Shelly! [Finally, I at least get the “concept” of something today. Also, the thought of Dr. Drew naked and sweaty helps me comprehend just how someone could give up masturbation altogether.]
