Flashing In Our Pan
by D.Minion
They say there’s nothing new in porn. [Also, there’s apparently no new thing under the sun, but I’m not sure if that counts in the ocean or not. The Bible is even more confusing than Shakespeare; why couldn’t people just talk regular until about 1900? I’ve always wondered that.] And if you’re trying to create something new in porn, it has to be bigger and badder than what’s already out there. [Most everyone in adult over the last 10 years or so slowly began to ignore the process proven historically successful in long-term stability for a company, as a matter of fact, latching instead onto the “New Naked Girl Every Month” philosophy that worked for Playboy many, many moons ago. I get that gonzo product became amazingly cheap to shoot and distribute as the price of the equipment dropped, but if you compare the financial strength of Playboy with, say, Vivid these days, you’d think more people would be paying attention. Maybe there are no new things under the sun, and most of the old things under the sun remain stupid anyway. … But I digress.]
But we found something new; her name is Reagan Conner and she isn’t big or bad, but she is definitely different – in very good ways! [This could honestly be accurate. It could be that all of the youth of today have an amazingly nonchalant view of capitalism, sexuality and sex in general, but since we don’t know all of the youth of today, we’re just going to have to start with an analysis of Reagan — a fine intellectual place to start by the way.]
Our buddy Tommy, who found Tenaya selling vacuum cleaners, found Reagan dancing at a strip club. [It’s just a guess, but it seems like the second location might be slightly more appropriate as a place one might look for porn talent. That said, most people wouldn’t put “Tom” and “appropriate” in the same sentence. Actually, they probably wouldn’t put those two words in the same paragraph.] He helped her get into the porn business, although she’s gorgeous, sexy, and not a bit shy, so she didn’t need a whole lot of help! Tommy pointed her in the right directions, though. That’s where we came in. [Tom’s also sneaky. I thought we were just getting a free lunch. (Yeah, so I forgot that rule about free lunches. We’re really busy, you know.)]
