Apparently Daisy listens to Aural Sex because she called in to say that she adores Dee and only deflected her advances because she is a lady and doesn’t take advantage of inebriated women. She also offered to go down on Dee on air to prove how much she likes her! (Ever see a porn star blush? Dee loves women but is extremely shy around them. She didn’t say “No” to Daisy, though!) [When you see Daisy, which you will if you keep going, you will understand why. So am I the only one that has never had a random beautiful stranger offer to go down on me just to show me how much she likes me? In my opinion, this whole having a penis thing is way overrated.]
Dick was getting over the “Vegas flu,” the ubiquitous sickness that almost everyone succumbs to after the AEE convention. With recirculated air, lots of people in one place hugging and kissing each other, little sleep — and lots of alcohol — everyone tends to get sick when they get back to Los Angeles. (Not me, though! After fifteen years of teaching school I’m immune to just about everything!) [Didn’t we hear a story about how DM can be seen ordering milk at the casino bars? Maybe it’s a calcium D thing.]
When Skibba arrived, he announced that he was “officially sick,” so sick that he almost wore his monkey pajamas on air. Great. But he’s a professional and sucked it up during the show. [Well we’ve already established this to be an appropriate show to do so, suck up, we mean.]
Dick was just about over the “Vegas flu,” but was lonely and looking for female companionship. He suggested a “Get Dick A Chick” contest. (That’s one way of getting a date!) [This may not be the best way, however, although it does get points for being cheaper than some of the more certain options.]
After many failed attempts at chatting in the KSEX chat room and co-hosting her show at the same time, an admittedly ADHD Dee covered up the computer. That worked! She could concentrate on the show. (But she really missed the conversation in the chat room!) [If you want to expand upon this interesting fact in an email, and you wish to yell about it, you’d ADD ADHD DEE. Geeks think about weird things.]
By this time Dee was completely naked. “I answer fan mail in the nude,” Dee admitted. [In case you’re curious, this explains completely why we always have a pile of it for her to get to immediately here in the office.]
Just then KSEX Daisy walked into the studio. “NOOOOO!!!!” Dee yelled. (She wasn’t quite ready for her. Luckily Daisy didn’t take offense, and promised to be back when Dee was a little more calm.) I got Dee a large glass of wine to calm her nerves. [Either Daisy had relented a bit on her earlier standards, or she was drinking too. TWO drunk women never seem to mind taking advantage of each other. … OK. So that’s never happened at my house in particular, but apparently some of the folks around here have more interesting lives. Hope springs eternal in many breasts, as it turns out.]
