Filed Under: Juli Ashton

October 2013 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

10/31/13	One of our telecommuting team members apparently has a tradition in his neighborhood where when the kids say “Trick or Treat” they get candy — while the adults get a shot of some sort, and not the kind that protects you from the flu. Now none of us has ever been to that particular neighborhood, but the kids probably run from house to house because it won’t be too long before mom and dad need to head home because they’re too drunk to walk much more. You’ll have to provide your own shots this evening but we have provided some dandy treats with Cytherea, Kylie Ireland, Syren Sexton, and even Summer Knight. There’s a story in there somewhere, and we will likely tell it. [STAR TAGS: Cytherea, Kylie Ireland Video, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, Summer Knight Video, Bonnie Rotten, 247AdultStars.com ]
10/26/13	It seems like referencing Harold Hill in an adult web site might be a bit unusual, yet we happily do just that this time around. As you may know, however, we have not historically been all that concerned with “usual” in any of our approaches to life. On the other hand, we also pay tribute to a $1,500 sex toy, which falls closer to the adult members’ site norm. Of course we did title the current article, “Oh, We Got Treble.” So there’s that. To quote our leader in today’s post, “We’re just weird.” [STAR TAGS: Jeska Vardinski Video, Asa Akira Video]
10/22/13	Never one to worry much about her own wardrobe, we were a bit surprised when D.Minion showed up in the office insisting that everyone check out her new shirt. It says, “I have CDO, which is like OCD but in alphabetical order — as it should be.” … Suddenly everything made more sense, a bit like when you discover that a professional model might often make a darned good photographer. We use Dee as an example of this last theory, because overall she might hold more universal interest than D.Minion, even with the funny shirt. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers, Dee Video, Michelle Lay Video]
10/17/13	Consider the concept of the Practical Homonym, these being words that may not technically “sound the same” but given the actualities of our speech patterns do in fact come across as identical to the ear. For example, Bijou spearheaded a track today which ended up being entitled “Minstrel Machinations,” but when she tried to explain the idea to the rest of us, we heard “Menstrual Machinations.” … Those seem different, really. … Fortunately we’re going with the former of those two concepts, so fear not. And if you think we made up the concept of the practical homonym, we can prove that we did not. Think about it: Country Music would not exist without it. So there. [STAR TAGS: Dee Exclusive Video, Kristal Summers Video, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Wendy Divine, Kylie Ireland Video]
10/13/13	Name a famous anthropologist. OK. Now name one that never had anything to do with primates. Better yet, name a famous “-ologist” of any kind, not including the fictional ones on television or in books. Fortunately, around here we can illustrate our “-ologies” with all sorts of interesting things, for example Keri Windsor, or even the still happily married Wendy Divine and Eric Masterson. In fact, you can happily pretend you have never learned anything as a member here. Should that turn out to be true, however, and you at some point meet any of us in person, please lie about it. We’re fine with that, so long as you have fun. [STAR TAGS: Wendy Divine, Keri Windsor Video]
10/11/13	Everyone needs a friend they can go to with the really tough questions. And this friend should be available for most any emergency, at most any time. Well, not all of us can claim Dee fits into that category for them, but we can happily do so. She does seem a little confused when we call to ask her what kind of yellow mustard to buy or something — as if we’d call just to hear her voice or anything — but as long as she picks up the phone she sounds as adorable as ever. It has been going to voice mail a lot lately, though, so hopefully we won’t have anything other than condiment emergencies for a while. We should probably stop beginning every conversation with, “What are you wearing?” … [STAR TAGS: Dee, Cytherea]
10/8/13	When Kristal Summers asks you do do something, you pretty much just agree quickly. When Kristal Summers asks you to do something that involves her being naked, well, you jump right to the task of helping the Selfie Supreme Diva. AND, when Kristal Summers asks you to do something that involves you getting naked with her … well, we honestly have no idea what happens then, because so far Kristal has been lacking in that department, truth be told. Hope springs eternal in Kristal’s breasts, though. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers, Chasey Lain, Anna Joy Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
10/5/13	Today could have been all about our leader’s brother. Or it could have been all about our editor’s best friend from college, since both of them have birthdays today. On the other hand, Juli Ashton also has a birthday today, and without any empirical evidence to verify the claim, we’re pretty sure Juli looks better naked than either of those two fine gentlemen we mentioned. Even the illustrious Ms. Ashton had a beginning it appears, and D.Minion takes the opportunity to talk about it. Truth be told, D.Minion does not need much of an excuse to talk about Juli; when she has a real reason, it can get crazy. [STAR TAGS: Juli Ashton Video]
10/1/13	What do you call words that rhyme, but don’t look like they would? Take ”plaid” and “fad” for example. … Or what do you call words that could rhyme, but may not, depending upon how you pronounce one of them? You know, “lead” could rhyme with “fed” or we could “lead” you to Lake Meade. Fortunately your knowledge of semantic nuance makes absolutely no difference at all today, as you can consider plaid a fad, or not consider it at all. We do have various concurrent contributions from Cytherea, Shayla LaVeaux, Kylie Ireland, Summer Knight, Angela Stone, and a couple of amateur lesbians from Canberra to help as tour guides, by the way. Follow where they lead. Or lead others to where they lead. Or fed. Or whatever. [STAR TAGS: Cytherea, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Kylie Ireland Video, Summer Knight Video, Angela Stone Video, Sarah Blake, Thereza Love, Dani Woodward]

Year:2013

Month:October

March 2013 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

3/31/13	Kylie’s contribution on this Easter Sunday was to point out that England does not have a kidney bank, but they do have a Liverpool. … We’re not sure what that has to do with Salvation, but then Natalia Forrest loving her boobs and Cytherea shaving seem equally confusing on that topic. Risqué has a revamped “Angel’s Fall from Grace,” though, which at least sounds on topic. It turns out that it’s another Life of a Potential Porn Star story, but, hey, we got the title right. [STAR TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Kylie Ireland Video, Natalia Forrest Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com, Taylor]
3/26/13	A Tale of Woe turns to Tales of Whoa! as Steve points out in his review of the AVN Awards Show this past January. Now you may think that we should have probably posted this sooner than nearly three months after the event, but honestly it took most of us that long to recover from the surprise of how good of a job AVN did this year. Of course if you set the bar low enough, eventually you’ll leap right over it. At least next year we may not have to force people to attend so they can write about it for the site. … Uh-oh. Expectations have risen. That’s never good. [STAR TAGS: AVN Awards 2013 Exclusive Video, Shayla LaVeaux, Kristal Summers, Cytherea, Cheyenne Silver]
3/21/13	On the first full day of spring, what could be better than enjoying Justine Joli and Jassie cavorting with rapture in front of a roaring fire? … OK. So technically the fire doesn’t really “roar,” per se. And “cavorting” may not be exactly right either, as that implies a bit of aimlessness that really does not appear here. Also, let’s face it, you’d probably be fine with Jassie and Justine in your living room no matter what season it happened to be. … Still, we do have “rapture” present — lots and lots of rapture. [STAR TAGS: Justine Joli Video, Jassie Video]
3/17/13	A traditional Irish blessing begins, “May the road rise to meet you … ” which turns out to be pretty ironic, seeing as how that’s exactly what happens if you drink too much green beer today. There’s a lot of mysticism in that Irish culture. In ours, however, we tend to be rather less metaphysical, concentrating instead on things like naked breasts in our annual Erins Go Braless (3) event. The women of the Risqué Commune have been accusing us of being remiss in mentioning the continuing updates to their individual sites, though, so we have a bunch of wildly helpful links for your membership enjoyment today. OK. So they might be simply normally helpful links, but at least we have included them. We so hate being remiss. It’s bad enough missing the first time. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Cytherea, Kylie Ireland Audio, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com ]
3/13/13	A clever group might have put together a dazzling array of three-ways today, considering all the threes in the date. Of course Kristal Summers having “first-time” sex with her boyfriend on camera sort of distracted us today. Sigh. As the writer Francois de La Rochefoucauld taught us, however, “The desire to seem clever often keeps us from being so.” … As it turns out, on this day of impending Pope-dom, there used to be a famous cardinal named Francois de La Rochefoucauld too, we learned. Gee. If Kristal had only met the two of them we could have had that 3-way. Of course she’d be like 400 years old now, and that seems to stretch even the most liberal definition of MILF. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers Video, Kylie Ireland, Julia Ann Exclusive Video, Devinn Lane, Nikita Denise]
3/10/13	Wouldn’t you know that we’re doing one of those, “Oh, wow. This is interesting, so we should just drop it into the middle of things, schedule be damned!” sorts of operations again? … Well, one of the geeks working on the free side remodel found an “orphaned” story, and rather than go all the way back to files from December of 2001, we decided rather to simply bring the story up to date today. Just when you had to deal with losing an hour’s sleep and trying to figure out how you can parlay that time trick into an entire week off work? … Well, if you do figure out how to do that, you have a lot of time to think about Being with Juli Ashton. If not, you may have to hurry. … To be employed, or not to be employed? That could be the question. [STAR TAGS: Juli Ashton, Tina Tyler, Dee, Chloe, Shawna Sexton, Bridgette Kerkove, Charlie Angel]
3/8/13	In the final analysis, none of us will really have to worry much about the calculation, seeing as how we’ll be dead and all. Those left behind will have to deal with all the annoying realities (and math), however, and so we offer up a bit of hope and happiness today amidst a retrospective view of Our Tragic Heroine. She lives, by the way, and we also have puppy pictures too. You probably won’t even remember to be all existential and such. Group sex has a way of being distracting. [STAR TAGS: Jill Kelly Video]
3/5/13	Did you know that the female housefly normally only mates once, since she has an ability to store sperm for when she needs it to fertilize more eggs later? Obviously a housefly would make a pretty lousy porn star, because they would have to retire after just one scene. Also, they’re not that pretty — unless, perhaps, you happen to be another fly. If you happened to be a fly on the wall, however, during D.Minion’s most recent week in Vegas, you might have seen all kinds of porn stars that did not suffer from that whole “one mating” tendency. We considered this an excellent thing, even though it took DM a bit of time to get it all written down. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers, Shayla LaVeaux, Vicca Video, Nikita Video, Michael Ninn]
3/1/13	Reports out of the Vatican reveal that while the 145 critical individuals have all arrived from across the world, they have not as yet elected a new supreme leader for the Catholic faith. It seems that for a few days at least, they will all be too pooped to Pope. … Should their exhaustion reach critical levels, the cardinals could consider allowing Shayla LaVeaux and Kristal Summers to serve as “Maids to Order” so that our comely lasses might handle the day to day clutter which inevitably accumulates when smart people sit around and think. At least that’s our excuse around here, and we plan on letting Shayla and Kristal help as much as they want. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Kristal Summers Exclusive Video]

Year:2013

Month:March

Risque Blog Emerges

Blogs Going Croak in the Night by Nobody Special Well, the Free Risque Blog version … we’re not sure, something in the teens, probably … launches today. Once again, we’ve put together what at least our geeks feel to be cutting-edge technology to talk about, if not technically the world’s oldest profession, at least its […]

Stars:Juli Ashton, Nikita, Shayla LaVeaux, Taren Steele, Vicca

Location:Denver, Las Vegas, London, Los Angeles, Pasadena, San Francisco, The World!

Setting:Freestyle

Technique:Editorial

December 2012 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

12/31/12	Who knew that by watching a highly anticipated (well, by some) football game you could be inundated with advertisements for a new television show on AMC featuring “Competitive Taxidermy” of all things? Who knew that taxidermy could be competitive? … Who knew they even still did taxidermy? We have some other thoughts on year’s end today, none of which feature dead animals, just in case you were curious. [FEATURED TAGS: Happy New Year!]
12/29/12	You may not have noticed, but if you put all the College Bowl Games together, you could have a heck of a party. You could wear Russel Athletics or New Era Pinstripes, if you knew what those were, maybe. You’d have Tostitos, Buffalo Wings, Idaho Potatoes, Chick-fil-A, Little Caesars Pizza, and even Beef ‘O’ Brady and Outback to eat. You could decorate the place with roses, sip orange juice while you get some sugar from your sweetie, and even stuff cotton in your ears if she started complaining that you were not fighting her hunger with Kraft sufficiently. You’d have wonderful things to talk about like insurance, or car care, wireless services, or taxes, mortgages, or Korean cars. You could even discuss what the heck scantily-clad women and beautiful race car drivers have to do with web domain registration. Best of all, you’d have a Bell Helicopter to escape if some folks started remembering the Alamo a bit too enthusiastically. … Fortunately, none of that had anything to do with even more Shayla today. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video]
12/27/12	Shayla has a special day today well worthy of celebrating. Also in our occasionally not completely behind efforts to bring the really old pages up to modern standards, we will run across some original photos now and again. We weren’t horribly disorganized back in those days, but if someone had told us the sites would last this long, we would have done things differently. … It’s sort of like that old saying, “You know, if I’d have known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.” … Except we still get Shayla naked. That helps a lot with most things. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Alexandra Silk, Missy]
12/25/12	We wish you a Merry Christmas. And if you do not happen to celebrate Christmas, well we wish you a merry day of the miscellaneous variety. We’re friendly that way. [FEATURED TAGS: Kylie Ireland]
12/24/12	Too often in life we lose old friends, whether that be to any of the Big Three options — Sex, Love, Money — or not. Of course “losing” implies a lot of stuff way too deep for discussion here, and sometimes you just want to dance around in a circle like some Charles M. Schultz character not yet burdened by anything really icky — like three dimensions. Say, for example, if you “lose old friends” but then they come back, were they really lost — or simply slapping you upside the face with preternatural insight? … Yeah. We don’t care either. … Basically Kylie makes everything better in our experience. Anything else, well that’s too deep for our pond. [FEATURED TAGS: Kylie Ireland, Anais Video]
12/21/12	We could hardly deny that we have been guilty of perpetrating some fairly tortured logic in our quests to tie miscellaneous bits of our lives together so that we might present it for your viewing pleasure. Of course all of this pales in comparison with trying to explicate poetry from 1788. Fortunately, you can easily enjoy Cytherea — in cam show and still form — as well as Kelly Kline, without any iambic pentameter at all. They are women without meter, after all. [FEATURED TAGS: Kelly Kline, Cytherea Exclusive Video]
12/18/12	We learned on some crime show the other night that a pig’s orgasm can last up to 30 minutes. Now we’re on enough weird Google Search lists somebody keeps compiled somewhere, so we chose not to really pursue the statement any further, but we did realize that if true this sort of adds a whole new dimension to the expression, “In a pig’s eye,” does it not? … Hey, you spend a few hours watching Dee do a DP and a fine Brit offer up Holiday greetings, and see how your brain feels. [FEATURED TAGS: Dee Video, Juli Ashton, May, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com, Michael Ninn]
12/17/12	You have to be careful how much you really think about things, because you can wind up somewhere no one actually intended. Of course we have found that beer does a dandy job in relieving a befuddled state — or at least it seems to — but if you have to drive somewhere, consider ice cream in its place. Whatever the case, you may find simply looking at (or watching) Shayla LaVeaux, as well as Wendy Divine, might be the best approach this time around. Either that or you might need a lot of ice cream. [FEATURED TAGS: Wendy Divine, Maya Divine, Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Capri Anderson Exclusive Video]
12/12/12	Naturally we had to do an update at 12:12 on 12/12/12 because otherwise D.Minion would be very sad. Worse yet, then we couldn’t make it up to her for 100 years, by which point she’d be not only officially peeved, but also really, really old. Fortunately Mr. Ninn and Cytherea happen by to help us reach our desired goal, even if the precise timing might be a bit difficult to prove in court or anything. If it’s always 5:00 somewhere, then it stands to reason that it’s always 12:12 somewhere too, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Jordan Video, Cassidey Video, Renee Perez Video, Brea Bennett Video, Nikki Kane Video, Shayla LaVeaux, Vicca, Shayla LaVeaux, Ashley Renee, Paisley Hunter, Payton Alexander, Ruby, Kortknee, Emanuelle, Jill Kelly, Michael Ninn]
12/10/12	In case any of you were thinking about moving into the middle of nowhere to be with Steve, he has some excellent news for you. Although the temperature outside when he woke up yesterday morning had only reached nine degrees, by mid day the thermometer had skyrocketed to a balmy ten on the Fahrenheit scale. … OR you could plan on meeting Kristal in Florida next time she visits. All in all, that might be warmer. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers Video]
12/7/12	Most of you have probably barely been able to contain your excitement at the prospect of catching even a glimpse of Cytherea’s personal valet, MrT, in some photographs. Well, we can happily tell you that your wait is finally over! Woo-HOO! … Now we did have to surround those two or three important photos with a bunch more of Cytherea shaving and getting tattoos applied to make her scars less distracting on video, of course. But you can just ignore all those annoying porn star images and enjoy MrT — at least his hands and the back of his head. In case you were curious, Cy does always use waterproof temporary tattoos. Turns out that’s a good thing. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Video, Cate Harrington Exclusive Video, Natalia Forrest Exclusive Video, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
12/4/12	You probably noticed that we have all now officially reached the season where we can start thinking about the cool presents we want other people to give us for free again. True, retailers seem to be making “this time of year” fall earlier and earlier on the calendar, but once we hit December it seems fair for all of us to acknowledge it in general. Even if next year they start advertising Christmas right after the 4th of July, we will still look forward to the holiday offerings from Sam Phillips, actually. She has a unique way, that Sam. [FEATURED TAGS: Sam Phillips, Tasha Reign, Breanne Benson, Sophia Knight]
12/2/12	Lamentations abound today regarding the rapid demise of Flash becoming more and more apparent. Less bothersome to our leadership at least will be the reference to the public disintegration of a heretofore quite pompous organization in the National Football League. On the off chance that neither of these two topics hold any interest for you, we sneak in an announcement that might, and if that doesn’t work we have over 30 minutes of video that might give you a pleasant “mind space” in which to ruminate — or whatever. [FEATURED TAGS: Dee Video, Kylie Ireland, Cytherea Video, Michael Ninn]