Just about then, Heather came back with her toys. The ladies set their novelties on a table, and the entire crew seemed to come out of the woodwork to see the goodies! I took photos of the stash so they could be put back in the right place if necessary. (Actually, I was just getting a picture so I could order them when I got home!) [As a matter of fact, we did get to keep all these prototypes, since you’ll generally get at least a few of each type for a shoot like this. Of course the only thing I wanted was the leopard-print ottoman, but the evil producer wouldn’t let us have that. Typical. … I happen to know that this lives at his own home these days, but I’m not bitter or anything.]
Finally it was time to begin. Producer Eric [“Evil” Producer Eric, as we’ve just demonstrated] reminded Heather, Michelle, and Adam to use clinical terms when describing body parts, and when describing what the toys could do. Since this show was going to be shopped to a straight network channel, “Oprah-type” words should be used. (Can you say, “va-jay-jay”?) [I can. I refuse.]
Both Heather and Michelle had taken their research seriously, and had tested all the girl-toys on themselves. [Such dedication, right?] One masturbation sleeve had been tested by Heather’s guy. Everything had been cleaned, of course, but Producer Eric said that he felt “close to (Heather’s) boyfriend” as he positioned the novelty on the table. (Then he went to wash his hands!) [Typically, the male in this group would never acknowledge actually testing any of these products himself, because we all know that men don’t masturbate. Right?]
One of the goodies was a sex spray. It was supposed to be misted onto the penis, but Adam put it on his neck. “Will it make my throat sexy?” he wondered. Then he noted that his Adam’s apple had a “big boner”! [Men get embarrassed by the silliest things, don’t they?]
“Piloting” X360 — part two
I had a blast climbing the various staircases at the studio! I’d sneak up, snap some photos, and sneak back down. Note the tennis balls as banister finials! Clever! [Oh. That’s what those were?] And the blue picture that I took through an upstairs window was exactly what I saw. Blue glass is cool! It would be fun to live in a studio! Your furniture would change every day! And you could sleep on all kinds of wonderful platforms way up in the air! [True, and if you had to go pee in the middle of the night you would die. Sounds great.]
Just about then, Heather came back with her toys. The ladies set their novelties on a table, and the entire crew seemed to come out of the woodwork to see the goodies! I took photos of the stash so they could be put back in the right place if necessary. (Actually, I was just getting a picture so I could order them when I got home!) [As a matter of fact, we did get to keep all these prototypes, since you’ll generally get at least a few of each type for a shoot like this. Of course the only thing I wanted was the leopard-print ottoman, but the evil producer wouldn’t let us have that. Typical. … I happen to know that this lives at his own home these days, but I’m not bitter or anything.]
Finally it was time to begin. Producer Eric [“Evil” Producer Eric, as we’ve just demonstrated] reminded Heather, Michelle, and Adam to use clinical terms when describing body parts, and when describing what the toys could do. Since this show was going to be shopped to a straight network channel, “Oprah-type” words should be used. (Can you say, “va-jay-jay”?) [I can. I refuse.]
Both Heather and Michelle had taken their research seriously, and had tested all the girl-toys on themselves. [Such dedication, right?] One masturbation sleeve had been tested by Heather’s guy. Everything had been cleaned, of course, but Producer Eric said that he felt “close to (Heather’s) boyfriend” as he positioned the novelty on the table. (Then he went to wash his hands!) [Typically, the male in this group would never acknowledge actually testing any of these products himself, because we all know that men don’t masturbate. Right?]
One of the goodies was a sex spray. It was supposed to be misted onto the penis, but Adam put it on his neck. “Will it make my throat sexy?” he wondered. Then he noted that his Adam’s apple had a “big boner”! [Men get embarrassed by the silliest things, don’t they?]
Just about then, Heather came back with her toys. The ladies set their novelties on a table, and the entire crew seemed to come out of the woodwork to see the goodies! I took photos of the stash so they could be put back in the right place if necessary. (Actually, I was just getting a picture so I could order them when I got home!) [As a matter of fact, we did get to keep all these prototypes, since you’ll generally get at least a few of each type for a shoot like this. Of course the only thing I wanted was the leopard-print ottoman, but the evil producer wouldn’t let us have that. Typical. … I happen to know that this lives at his own home these days, but I’m not bitter or anything.]
Finally it was time to begin. Producer Eric [“Evil” Producer Eric, as we’ve just demonstrated] reminded Heather, Michelle, and Adam to use clinical terms when describing body parts, and when describing what the toys could do. Since this show was going to be shopped to a straight network channel, “Oprah-type” words should be used. (Can you say, “va-jay-jay”?) [I can. I refuse.]
Both Heather and Michelle had taken their research seriously, and had tested all the girl-toys on themselves. [Such dedication, right?] One masturbation sleeve had been tested by Heather’s guy. Everything had been cleaned, of course, but Producer Eric said that he felt “close to (Heather’s) boyfriend” as he positioned the novelty on the table. (Then he went to wash his hands!) [Typically, the male in this group would never acknowledge actually testing any of these products himself, because we all know that men don’t masturbate. Right?]
One of the goodies was a sex spray. It was supposed to be misted onto the penis, but Adam put it on his neck. “Will it make my throat sexy?” he wondered. Then he noted that his Adam’s apple had a “big boner”! [Men get embarrassed by the silliest things, don’t they?]
