August 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff


The best way to test the skills of a person trying to do a new job tends to be comparing the way they do the exact same thing as someone else has done. Like most philosophical principles, however, it tends to be difficult to test, since setting up the “exact” same task can be functionally impossible. Life simply has too many variables. Fortunately for us at some constants do exist, and we have people who have been around long enough to remember them. We’d never be so boring as to attempt a mere “Apples to Apples” analysis, however. Nope. We much prefer the “Cytherea to Cytherea” algorithm. We’re clever that way. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Missy Monroe, Jenna Presley, Angela Stone, Michael Ninn] 

Our Cytherea Algorithm

Occasionally in life you find yourself in a situation where your most sophisticated intellectual response follows generally along the lines of, “Huh. That’s odd. I wonder what in the world possessed them to do that.” … And then hopefully you do something worthwhile, like eat chocolate chocolate-chip ice cream or something. Today just might be one of those days, but when you have Shayla LaVeaux, Raquel Devine and various other miscellaneous pretty people to help you with your ruminations, you probably won’t mind very much. You will need to supply your own ice cream, however. We can only do so much. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Raquel Devine, Katsuni, Miko Lee, Olivia Del Rio Video]

Various Things Upon Which to Ruminate

Be careful what you wish for. And while we’re on the topic of simple advice that people almost never listen to, you might be careful about the examples you’re setting for others in life. Dedicated (or perhaps more Devious) students might take advantage of an opening to provide some teaching of their own — which the teacher will almost certainly ignore, of course. Could it be that Lessons Learned are not in fact like Bridges Burned; or could it be that “learned” doesn’t really mean what we think it means? … It’s a good thing we don’t do philosophy for a living on risque. It’s hard. … Well, we do “do” hard, but that’s a different story. [FEATURED TAGS: Renee Perez Video, Sabrina Rose Video, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video,, Michael Ninn]

Revisiting Renee Perez

Well a warden didn’t throw a party in the county jail — at least not for anyone we know, which doesn’t say much because we don’t actually know anyone in the country jail — so we had to modify the song allusion to “Jailhouse Walk” for our purposes today. If Elvis had not died back in 1977 he would be 76 now, as all of those people remembering the anniversary of his death kept telling us this week. Of course we responded by pointing out that if Duke Albert of Austria hadn’t died on the same date, he’d be 653 today. None of that has anything whatsoever to do with Cytherea or Katja Kean, however, a fact that probably makes members feel a lot better about coming inside. [FEATURED TAGS: Katja Kean, Cytherea Video, Michael Ninn]

Katja Kean - Probably Worth Going to Jail For

One of the exceptional benefits of having an intelligent, insightful, and interested Membership base stems from the fact that it tends to keep poor, overworked, webmasters focused on task. Of course, should any web minions make an error, a zealous Member might jump upon the oversight, resulting in general feelings of sadness around the office. Over the years we have found a rapid and complete lapse into Denial to be quite a benefit in the recovery process — even if only in the psychological sense. In addition, a quick ratchet into righteous indignation can be helpful. In this case, alas, the intelligent, insightful, and interested Member might actually be correct, so after hours and hours of anguish and pointed despair, we arrived at a fitting Official Response: “Whoops. Dang.” … Honestly descending into proper angst really takes much more devotion and dedicated attention than we were willing to devote to the project. We have many naked women to document; we’re really busy. [FEATURED TAGS: Athena Angel, Shayla LaVeaux Video] 

The Answer is Blowing in the “Win”

Every once in awhile, no matter how long you’ve been doing something professionally, you can still be surprised — at least if you have fun doing what you do for a living. Differently in this job, most likely, you can accidentally run across a beautiful woman masturbating and it doesn’t result in some mandatory report to Human Resources (a title which takes on an entirely different connotation when you put it in terms of masturbation, actually). Should Aurora Snow be such a woman you might be inclined to comment upon how many people in the country would welcome a little “snow” in their lives right about now. But that wouldn’t be necessary, really. “Beautiful Woman Masturbating” pretty much gets people’s attention without much elaboration. [FEATURED TAGS: Aurora Snow Video, Michael Ninn]

Aurora Snow - Cool, right?

The intricate process of becoming a beautiful model — with professional-level skills — took Anais, well, maybe five or six seconds as it turned out. Some people just seem to be born for the camera. And wouldn’t you know it, we just seem to always have a collection of cameras with us. Ain’t serendipity cool? … Now since this complete (this time) collection of “first time as a professional on camera” photos happened to take place in a fancy bathroom, and since we’re set to the task of reminding everyone to check because Shayla does some bizarre stuff over there, well, this all seemed perfect. Truth be told, though, we honestly can’t remember when an excuse to see Anais (and Shayla) naked came up that didn’t seem perfect. Odd. … [FEATURED TAGS: Anais, Shayla LaVeaux Video]

Still Not Missing the Milk

Chaos surrounds us! France has turned out not to be that reliable of an ally, and people have suddenly realized that the stock market may not be something that we should just play around with on a daily basis. Gosh, who knew? To provide a calming influence, we’re doing a bit of “Dee Constructing” today, providing pithy economic lessons, critical utopian philosophy, and beautiful naked women. Seriously, where can you find a better combination — even on the big ol’ World Wide Web? [FEATURED TAGS: Dee, Inari Vachs, Alektra Blue Video, Jessica Drake Video, Kirsten Price Video, Kaylani Lei Video, Mikayla Mendez Video]

Dee Constructing - Well

Did you happen to know that a flibbertigibbet refers to what you might more easily recognize as an “airhead” if you tried to have a conversation with one? Now the fact that we’re ruminating upon the vast array of adjectives that have evolved throughout civilization simply to describe stupid people should not worry you at this point. You can just ignore us as usual, and get to the more centered reality of our typical discourse, that being life in the adult movie business. … Yep. Not a flibbertigibbet around here anywhere. We’re a very serious lot. What does “serious” mean again? [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Cassidey, Anna Joy, The Four Trailer Video, Michael Ninn]

Interesting Office Position

Kristal called in the other day, very excited about a series of “Wrestling Videos” she’s set to do with our old friend Tanya Danielle. Rather than correct Dear Ms. Summers by pointing out that “video” would probably not be the technically correct term anymore, D.Minion immediately recalled that she had a photo set of Kristal and Tanya from way back, ironically at another time in her life when our Dear Kristal Summers fell into the Eager Beaver category. Granted we probably didn’t correct Kristal because many of us here still use the term “video” to describe a shoot, but it could have been the thought of soon getting to see Kristal and Tanya naked again. That can be very distracting all on its own you know. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers, Tanya Danielle, Lola, Jade Marcella]

They DO Look Eager, Right?