by Henry Patrick
[On the members’ side, these photos show up as one part of one evening in the epic that became “Chantelle Fox Comes to America.” We’re not sure how much of it will eventually end up on the risque free side, but she did spend a lot of time in public with us, so we ended up with lots of photos and videos where she actually had clothes on. That doesn’t happen every day around here.]
| 2/27/15 |  You see all sorts of popular crime shows on television using an almost trite “Mob” theme to build in the necessary tension to satisfy, well, technically about 42 minutes. When you hear about Nikita and the Rushin’ Mob, today, however, that may stay with you for years to come. Think about it, though, who would you rather remember for a long time, Tony Soprano, or Nikita? [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video, Nikita Video, PJ Sparxx Video, Danielle Rodgers Video] |
| 2/25/15 | 
KylieIreland We Could Connect to Ourselves … (#15)[STAR TAGS: Kylie Ireland Audio] |
| 2/21/15 | 
247AdultStars Seeing the Forrest for the Please[STAR TAGS: Natalia Forrest Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com] |
| 2/20/15 |  Having done some rough calculations, we put the number of upcoming stories involving Chantelle Fox at about 1,000. … OK. So we won’t really have that many entries about our new U.K. friend, but we could. She’s exceptional, even with her clothes on. And you can’t say that about just anyone. You’ll begin to get a glimpse as Lon teaches Chantelle and Maverick about being truly High Rollers in Vegas. [STAR TAGS: Chantelle Fox Exclusive Video] |
| 2/17/15 |  In an era where a major lingerie supplier can take the “push your boobs together so it looks like you have a lot of cleavage” concept and turn it into an advertising campaign promising “anti-gap shaping” you can pretty much expect anything intended for public display to be long on misdirection. Around here, however, we celebrate Dee’s Birthday with certainly her most famous television experience — the one where she chose a woman to have sex with her husband and then … well, possibly regretted it. You get nothing but absolutely real emotion here, although we really can’t say the same thing about all of our cleavage. [STAR TAGS: Dee Video, Juli Ashton Video, Ginny Video] |
| 2/15/15 |
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| 2/14/15 | 
KylieIreland Oh, My Darling Please Surrender …[STAR TAGS: Kylie Ireland Video]
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| 2/8/15 | 
Shayla Power to the People[STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Chantelle Fox Exclusive Video] |
| 2/5/15 | 
KylieIreland She CAN Always Get What She Wants[STAR TAGS: Kylie Ireland Video]
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| 2/4/15 |  Never really the point of the operation here, we nevertheless do a good bit of Photoshop work on some photos, and even employ structurally similar techniques on a lot of the video you can see. We exist in essence as a fantasy entertainment business, after all, and even porn stars may not always be quite as perfect as they would like. So we help them look their best if need be, although probably a lot less than people in the “regular world” might believe. Then there’s Julia Ann — who needs no help at all. Ever. … We think we might have figured out the reason, but you’ll need to read to see it. Or you can just look at her. People seem to like that too. [STAR TAGS: Julia Ann Video] |
| 2/1/15 | 
247AdultStars And the Awards Go …[STAR TAGS: 2015 AVN Awards, Chantelle Fox, 247AdultStars.com] |
| 1/31/15 | 
CythereasWetWorld Tanning the Tub[STAR TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video] |
| 1/29/15 |
KylieIreland Doing Janine … (#7)[STAR TAGS: Kylie Ireland, Ginger Lynn] |
| 1/28/15 |  In a completely uncharacteristic burst of timeliness and relevance, we have returned from the “2015 Adult Entertainment Expo” in Las Vegas with our observations. OK. So technically we brought back well over 200GB of data from shoots and such, and it will take a bit of time to get all of that organized, but we do have written observations, which we have enhanced with Sarah Blake and Breanne Benson for those people that prefer the more traditional observations. Spend some time considering lofty issues, you know, while watching lesbian sex on a rooftop in downtown LA. [STAR TAGS: Sarah Blake Video, Breanne Benson Video] |
| 1/26/15 | 
247AdultStars We Shan’t Tell … Presumably[STAR TAGS: Chantelle Fox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com] |
| 1/26/15 | 
Shayla Just a Little Therapy[STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video]
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| 1/18/15 |  Being the exceptionally clever sorts, it occurred to us that we should probably put up the coverage of last year’s AVN Awards show before we left for Las Vegas to attend the one this year. Yeah, sometimes we display a truly dizzying intellect. As we prepare this time, though, we have more than 50 years of combined experience, so we know exactly what to do. In fact, our ledger that shows the posting schedule lays out the plan perfectly: It says, and you will notice the quotes here: “VEGAS BABY! … Eat Ice Cream … Get Fat … Don’t Care. … So there.” And now you know how the professionals do it. … See y’all in a week. [STAR TAGS: 2015 AVN Awards, Chanel Preston, Samantha Saint, Remy LaCroix, Alexandra Silk Video]
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| 1/17/15 |  People come in from all over the world to hang with us at the Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas. Each year you will find us amazed at how many people we have never even met will schedule often expensive trips just hoping to buy us a beer. Of course some less enlightened folks might think that all of these strangers have traveled to the “City of Lights” to see all the porn stars, but we’re pretty sure that can’t be it. And we’re never wrong — at least that we can remember. [STAR TAGS: Chantelle Fox Exclusive Video, Bliss Dulce, Karmen Karma, 247AdultStars.com] |
| 1/16/15 | 
247AdultStars Fox in Socks — The Adult Version[STAR TAGS: Chantelle Fox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com] |
| 1/15/15 | 
Shayla Carnival of Shayla Knowledge[STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video, PJ Sparxx Video, Kylie Ireland] |
| 1/14/15 | 
KylieIreland Gettin’ Some “Strange”[STAR TAGS: Kylie Ireland Video, Jada Fire Video] |
| 1/12/15 |  Everybody needs a way to take a little break sometimes, a way to get away from the simple weight of the world. While we can think of 13 reasons not to get away today, we can think of 24 reasons that we absolutely should stop thinking about reality so much. Of course we do not mean to imply that 24-13 has any significance at all after the playoff games this past weekend. … Nope. … Can’t remember a thing. Been thinking about Taren Steele and Dee. [STAR TAGS: Taren Steele Video, Kylie Ireland Video, Dana Vespoli Video, Capri Anderson Video, Tiffany Mynx Video, Dee]
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| 1/10/15 | 
247AdultStars Definitely More Than a Handful[STAR TAGS: Chantelle Fox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com] |
| 1/9/15 |  So we’re sleeping, and right in the middle of a good dream, like all at once we wake up, from something that keeps knocking at the brain. Before we go insane we hold a pillow to our heads, and spring up in our beds, screaming out our favorite spread. We know we love Dee. … And if you recognize that song reference, D.Minion loves you too. The rest of us are just a little worried about you, however. [STAR TAGS: Dee Exclusive Video, Juli Ashton Exclusive Video] |
| 1/8/15 | 
Shayla Haven’t You Missed Me?[STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video] |
| 1/6/15 |  Slipping someone a “mickey” — in case you have never read old detective novels or been a film noir fan — generally means putting something in their drink designed to knock them out. Now presumably this happens for nefarious intent, because, after all, when was the last time you thought to yourself, “You know, this would be a lot of fun if only so-and-so were unconscious?” … Alright, so now that we think about it, that happens every time you take a fan of the opposing team to a sporting event, but that’s not important now. Now we will consider Slipping Mickey a Hmm … [STAR TAGS: Taren Steele Video] |
| 1/4/15 |
KylieIreland A Certain Incident at a Booth … (#44)[STAR TAGS: Kylie Ireland, Cricket] |
| 1/3/15 | 
Shayla The Unlocked Door[STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video] |
| 1/1/15 |  Next year we want to be on the college bowl selection committee. Honestly we couldn’t care less which teams actually play in the games; we just want to help pick the names of the bowls themselves. Of course we understand that sponsorship means money to these places, but it can get silly. We’re starting to get them named after duck call manufacturers, if you can believe that. We have some that appear to be just colors, which seems confusing, because who pays for those? And when was that last time you associated anything “new era” with pinstripes? What, do they sew the little lines with itty-bitty binary code or something? … While we Welcome in the New Year in the fashion people pretty much care nothing about imitating anyway, you can think about what you might like to see in the next college football season. So far we know we want a mini-championship that we could use like every month or something, just rotating teams. We’ll call it the Serial Bowl. [STAR TAGS: Faye Taylor, 247AdultStars.com] |
| 1/1/15 | 
247AdultStars Faye Taylor – Lady in Red[STAR TAGS: Faye Taylor, 247AdultStars.com] |
| 9/28/14 |
Cytherea has a birthday this weekend, and consequently we must celebrate in an appropriate fashion. Of course having been out with Cytherea on multiple occasions over the years, we can say that “appropriate fashion” leaves a lot of leeway for us. We stuck with the traditional beautiful naked shots, however, proving both that we appreciate Cytherea and she can scare us a little. [STAR TAGS: Cytherea Video] |
| 9/24/14 |
Honestly we have no idea why an entire religious faith would have one special day dedicated to hurrying along one specific woman, but we try to be accepting of most beliefs around here. Consequently, in honor of our good buddy Lon, who happens to understand this religious faith, we humbly offer Rushing Hannah. [STAR TAGS: Kylie Ireland Video, Jenna Jameson Video, Felicia Video, Cheyenne Silver] |
| 9/22/14 |
A couple of us were up in San Francisco last week and happened to notice two concurrent events going on. Amidst the artwork and rebellion illustrated by the “Tattoo Expo” planners had also decided to put on the “Beerfest” celebration. … Yeah, what could possibly go wrong? … In our particular case today, neither Paola Rey, Celeste Star, nor Holly Morgan look in the least bit inebriated. One of them might have tattoos, but honestly we forgot to look. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Chantelle Fox Exclusive Video, Paola Rey Video, Celeste Star Video, Holly Morgan Video, 247AdultStars.com] |
| 9/17/14 |
Consider the sobriquet. While that was to be the original plan today, courtesy toward friends closed off that avenue of inspection. We considered a more subtle analysis of the word itself, seemingly a blend of sober and briquettes, bringing to mind an altogether unsatisfying BBQ without beer, but that seemed an approach to Georgia Jones and Jana Jordan too obtuse even for us. Suddenly D.Minion roared into the room shouting, “Hey! They have the last season of Bones on Netflix now!” … And at that point we simply decided to let people figure it out for themselves. Amidst all the glitz of this world, you often find the most basic searches for human happiness. [STAR TAGS: Jana Jordan Video, Georgia Jones Video, Faye Reagan, Michael Ninn] |
| 9/12/14 |
According to a psychology text book a ChickaDee brought into the office today, “Some form of hunger, love, hate, fear, hope or ambition gives rise to every human emotion and every human thought.” … While we hate to disagree with any sacred tomes used in our institutions of higher education, this cannot be correct. Clearly they have forgotten sleepy as an attribute. We have other thoughts today too, substantially enhanced by the application of naked women to the arguments. Come to think of it, sexual tension should be on that list too, unless they think no one ever has sex unless they’re in love, of course. [STAR TAGS: Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com] |
| 9/11/14 |
Somewhere in the neighborhood of 11,000 new citizens will be born in America today, and they will never know a world not under the enveloping threat of terrorism. We do what we can to continue our lives without being incapacitated by fear — the skill of cognizant ignorance being one many in the world consider the United States a champion. Kristal Summers helps us out again in a rare serious commentary from D.Minion. If you’d prefer to just have the short answer, we can give you that here: It’s sad that so many people will never know the feeling that came when flying was part of the fun of vacation. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers] |
| 9/7/14 |
Presumably D.Minion’s love of cheerleaders spurs her to announce the opening weekend of the NFL season, although it could simply be her love of paychecks. Colorado natives Shayla and Kylie add to the celebration along with “transplant Bronco fan” Cytherea. Truth be told, the female fans at risqué may not actually even know if their team happens to be playing, but everybody like Peyton, so they figure it counts. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers, Kylie Ireland Video, Ashlyn Gere, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Juli Ashton Video, Cytherea Exclusive Video, Nina Hartley Video, Taren Steele Video, Toni James Video] |
| 9/4/14 |
As the 2014 NFL Season launches tonight, we have come up with a simple solution for this silly “Do we have to change the name of the Washington Redskins because some people find it offensive?” debate. Rather than get all bogged down in ever-evolving Political Correctness, D.Minion has theorized that they can simply leave the name alone and change the mascot to a potato. We have never seen even one offended potato running around with lobbyists, and every game program could feature a nice recipe, like roasting with garlic and rosemary. … See? Thinking outside the box. We do that — with the assistance of Michelle Maylene this time around. … Someone call Roger Goodell. [STAR TAGS: Michelle Maylene Video] |
| 9/1/14 |
Much like parenting, you can never have favorites among your offspring. Also just like parenting, every manager has favorite clients, regardless of whether or not she or he ever admits it out loud. So as we close D.Minion’s final look at Georgia Adair’s final movie, we intend no implication of favoritism here. All clients are equal. Georgia was just a little more equal. … She became. She saw. She opted out of conquering. [STAR TAGS: Georgia Adair, Sue Diamond, Marlene, Victoria Sin, Michael Ninn] |
We basically operate under an “if you can’t say anything funny, you probably shouldn’t bother saying anything” sort of philosophy around here. We do 
