Filed Under: Renee Perez

December 2012 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

12/31/12	Who knew that by watching a highly anticipated (well, by some) football game you could be inundated with advertisements for a new television show on AMC featuring “Competitive Taxidermy” of all things? Who knew that taxidermy could be competitive? … Who knew they even still did taxidermy? We have some other thoughts on year’s end today, none of which feature dead animals, just in case you were curious. [FEATURED TAGS: Happy New Year!]
12/29/12	You may not have noticed, but if you put all the College Bowl Games together, you could have a heck of a party. You could wear Russel Athletics or New Era Pinstripes, if you knew what those were, maybe. You’d have Tostitos, Buffalo Wings, Idaho Potatoes, Chick-fil-A, Little Caesars Pizza, and even Beef ‘O’ Brady and Outback to eat. You could decorate the place with roses, sip orange juice while you get some sugar from your sweetie, and even stuff cotton in your ears if she started complaining that you were not fighting her hunger with Kraft sufficiently. You’d have wonderful things to talk about like insurance, or car care, wireless services, or taxes, mortgages, or Korean cars. You could even discuss what the heck scantily-clad women and beautiful race car drivers have to do with web domain registration. Best of all, you’d have a Bell Helicopter to escape if some folks started remembering the Alamo a bit too enthusiastically. … Fortunately, none of that had anything to do with even more Shayla today. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video]
12/27/12	Shayla has a special day today well worthy of celebrating. Also in our occasionally not completely behind efforts to bring the really old pages up to modern standards, we will run across some original photos now and again. We weren’t horribly disorganized back in those days, but if someone had told us the sites would last this long, we would have done things differently. … It’s sort of like that old saying, “You know, if I’d have known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.” … Except we still get Shayla naked. That helps a lot with most things. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Alexandra Silk, Missy]
12/25/12	We wish you a Merry Christmas. And if you do not happen to celebrate Christmas, well we wish you a merry day of the miscellaneous variety. We’re friendly that way. [FEATURED TAGS: Kylie Ireland]
12/24/12	Too often in life we lose old friends, whether that be to any of the Big Three options — Sex, Love, Money — or not. Of course “losing” implies a lot of stuff way too deep for discussion here, and sometimes you just want to dance around in a circle like some Charles M. Schultz character not yet burdened by anything really icky — like three dimensions. Say, for example, if you “lose old friends” but then they come back, were they really lost — or simply slapping you upside the face with preternatural insight? … Yeah. We don’t care either. … Basically Kylie makes everything better in our experience. Anything else, well that’s too deep for our pond. [FEATURED TAGS: Kylie Ireland, Anais Video]
12/21/12	We could hardly deny that we have been guilty of perpetrating some fairly tortured logic in our quests to tie miscellaneous bits of our lives together so that we might present it for your viewing pleasure. Of course all of this pales in comparison with trying to explicate poetry from 1788. Fortunately, you can easily enjoy Cytherea — in cam show and still form — as well as Kelly Kline, without any iambic pentameter at all. They are women without meter, after all. [FEATURED TAGS: Kelly Kline, Cytherea Exclusive Video]
12/18/12	We learned on some crime show the other night that a pig’s orgasm can last up to 30 minutes. Now we’re on enough weird Google Search lists somebody keeps compiled somewhere, so we chose not to really pursue the statement any further, but we did realize that if true this sort of adds a whole new dimension to the expression, “In a pig’s eye,” does it not? … Hey, you spend a few hours watching Dee do a DP and a fine Brit offer up Holiday greetings, and see how your brain feels. [FEATURED TAGS: Dee Video, Juli Ashton, May, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com, Michael Ninn]
12/17/12	You have to be careful how much you really think about things, because you can wind up somewhere no one actually intended. Of course we have found that beer does a dandy job in relieving a befuddled state — or at least it seems to — but if you have to drive somewhere, consider ice cream in its place. Whatever the case, you may find simply looking at (or watching) Shayla LaVeaux, as well as Wendy Divine, might be the best approach this time around. Either that or you might need a lot of ice cream. [FEATURED TAGS: Wendy Divine, Maya Divine, Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Capri Anderson Exclusive Video]
12/12/12	Naturally we had to do an update at 12:12 on 12/12/12 because otherwise D.Minion would be very sad. Worse yet, then we couldn’t make it up to her for 100 years, by which point she’d be not only officially peeved, but also really, really old. Fortunately Mr. Ninn and Cytherea happen by to help us reach our desired goal, even if the precise timing might be a bit difficult to prove in court or anything. If it’s always 5:00 somewhere, then it stands to reason that it’s always 12:12 somewhere too, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Jordan Video, Cassidey Video, Renee Perez Video, Brea Bennett Video, Nikki Kane Video, Shayla LaVeaux, Vicca, Shayla LaVeaux, Ashley Renee, Paisley Hunter, Payton Alexander, Ruby, Kortknee, Emanuelle, Jill Kelly, Michael Ninn]
12/10/12	In case any of you were thinking about moving into the middle of nowhere to be with Steve, he has some excellent news for you. Although the temperature outside when he woke up yesterday morning had only reached nine degrees, by mid day the thermometer had skyrocketed to a balmy ten on the Fahrenheit scale. … OR you could plan on meeting Kristal in Florida next time she visits. All in all, that might be warmer. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers Video]
12/7/12	Most of you have probably barely been able to contain your excitement at the prospect of catching even a glimpse of Cytherea’s personal valet, MrT, in some photographs. Well, we can happily tell you that your wait is finally over! Woo-HOO! … Now we did have to surround those two or three important photos with a bunch more of Cytherea shaving and getting tattoos applied to make her scars less distracting on video, of course. But you can just ignore all those annoying porn star images and enjoy MrT — at least his hands and the back of his head. In case you were curious, Cy does always use waterproof temporary tattoos. Turns out that’s a good thing. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Video, Cate Harrington Exclusive Video, Natalia Forrest Exclusive Video, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
12/4/12	You probably noticed that we have all now officially reached the season where we can start thinking about the cool presents we want other people to give us for free again. True, retailers seem to be making “this time of year” fall earlier and earlier on the calendar, but once we hit December it seems fair for all of us to acknowledge it in general. Even if next year they start advertising Christmas right after the 4th of July, we will still look forward to the holiday offerings from Sam Phillips, actually. She has a unique way, that Sam. [FEATURED TAGS: Sam Phillips, Tasha Reign, Breanne Benson, Sophia Knight]
12/2/12	Lamentations abound today regarding the rapid demise of Flash becoming more and more apparent. Less bothersome to our leadership at least will be the reference to the public disintegration of a heretofore quite pompous organization in the National Football League. On the off chance that neither of these two topics hold any interest for you, we sneak in an announcement that might, and if that doesn’t work we have over 30 minutes of video that might give you a pleasant “mind space” in which to ruminate — or whatever. [FEATURED TAGS: Dee Video, Kylie Ireland, Cytherea Video, Michael Ninn]

House of Perez

A House of Cards (as it turned out) by D.Minion DAY ONE — HOUSE OF PEREZ As I mentioned in my Sophia story, I believe that when humans announce their plans, God laughs. And I’m sure He was chuckling in Heaven as Lucky and I got ready to cover the last story of our Ninn […]

Stars:Jana Jordan, Renee Perez, Sophia

Location:Los Angeles

Setting:Movie Set

Technique:Professional

December 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

12/31/11	As near as we can tell, today happens to be New Year’s eve, and most places around the world happen to celebrate the new year with substantially more vigor and glee than they do any of those gift-giving holidays. Of course the vast majority of the world has at least a culture, but often an entire political system, that stems in no small degree from religious persecution, so maybe that makes sense. After all, it seems very wise to focus more on a day of the year you won’t get shot for celebrating, right? For our part, we have decided to stick to our roots as well. What they lack in historic violence and upheaval, they more than make up for in fun and nudity. This doesn’t set the bar very high, we understand, but as a rule we tend to prefer simple goals. (You members may have noticed.) And if D.Minion happens to discover our camouflaged secret, well, we plan on employing the exact same New Year’s Resolution we enjoy every year: Blame Maverick for everything. [FEATURED TAGS: Georgia Adair Video]
12/27/11	People do sometimes contribute to their own “Birthday Party” as Shayla has decided to do so today. True to at least our form, she chose to celebrate “Holliday” over the Holidays, and offers up some insights as to what it’s like being in the middle of 30 or 40 women all having sex together. Sadly, none of us here can really comment on this experience first-hand, but we do have a great many folks willing to learn. We value education, after all. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video, Kylie Ireland Video, Serenity Video, Juli Ashton Video, Nina Hartley Video, Shawna Lenee]
12/25/11	So did you sleep with thoughts of Sugar-Plums dancing through your head? Have you ever done that in your whole life? Would you even know a Sugar-Plum if it jumped out of the closet and bit you? And when is the last time you heard anyone exclaim, “My! What a clatter!” anyway? The fact that people around here spend time pondering such weighty issues serves as the only excuse I can think of for this Merry Christmas … um … Members’ Card. I worry about us sometimes. I really do. [FEATURED TAGS: Merry Christmas!]
12/24/11	You may not find it intuitive, but the adult movie industry happens to display a great deal of holiday cheer among its members. Of course you can’t really have a properly caroling environment without Ebenezer Scrooge, and thus we speak today with sincere affection for our friend Gregory Dark. True, we have chosen to do so with the able assistance of Juli Ashton, Kelly O’Dell, Felecia, and Serenity, but in our defense we claimed to be festive — not foolish. Why listen to some old fat guy that’s not planning on dropping down any chimneys tonight when you fill your silent nights with young ladies clearly coming about midnight? … There are way too many seasonal songs to consider. We’d best stop now. [FEATURED TAGS: Juli Ashton Video, Kelly O’Dell Video, Felecia Video, Serenity Video]
12/21/11	This is the time of year where we all get a little nostalgic; we all feel a little more optimistic, a little more peaceful. Benevolent tendencies, long hidden throughout the year, come closer to the surface, and we allow ourselves to pause a few more times during the day, just to feel a part of Mother Earth. … Or if you happen to be like us, you praise Rednecks everywhere, and wonder why everyone doesn’t celebrate the way we do. You forgive them, however, because let’s face it: If you go around saying everything you really think, no one is ever going to give you a gift — at least not one you’ll want to receive. [FEATURED TAGS: Anais, Georgia Adair, Angel Cassidy, Wanda Curtis, Michael Ninn, Bree Olsen Video, Sunny Leone Video]
12/19/11	We all know ‘Tis the Season of Giving, but let’s be honest, it’s pretty fun to get new things too. And with any luck they won’t be the sorts of things that will live in a closet until next year when we can give them again. In a typically benevolent re-gifting game, then, we have decided to offer up some holiday gift suggestions before we shuttle everyone off to enjoy Cytherea playing fauna amongst the flora. D.Minion “naturally” adds her special touch, although DM can be a lot like a gift from a distant relative: You honestly appreciate it, but you’re just not quite sure how to explain it to anyone. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video]
12/15/11	Rarely do we link directly to 247AdultStars.com — preferring rather to heighten anticipation, sweeten the experience, and generally make it more pleasantly pithy. … It’s either that or we pretty much like any excuse to show off more naked women. Theories may vary. All of this goes by the wayside this season, however, as Dear Maverick, being from London and thus used to a depressing Christmas season until the very last minute, has seen fit to visit a few ghosts on a couple of Brit Porn Stars and convince them to film a special holiday greeting for the members. You know what? … God Bless Us, Every One … [FEATURED TAGS: Anna Joy Exclusive Video, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
12/10/11	Contrary to D.Minion’s contention in the office, after making egg nog, they do not in fact use the rest of the animal to create Naugahyde seat covers. We try to be helpful with our insights here, just so no one gets confused as they go through life. You might consider, then, taking D.Minion’s view of Day Two of Ninn Worx’ House of Jordan shoot with a grain of salt — if not an entire spice rack. None of this detracts, however, from the 241 stellar photographs. … And how do we know these to be stellar photographs? Why all these women are stars, of course. [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Jordan, Alexis Love, Tiffany Sweet, Carli Banks, Michael Ninn]
12/7/11	You know those kind of “entertainment” things where folks get really sort of devious and sneak in little bits and pieces that presumably will teach us something? Sure, they couch it all in some general “Oh, my goodness, but this is a lot of fun!” sort of way, but it always sort of sounds like Tom Sawyer and that fence painting job? … You will be happy to know that for our part we are simply celebrating Chasey Lain’s birthday today, and if anyone learns anything, well, dang that ain’t our fault. How can porno be educational anyway? [FEATURED TAGS: Chasey Lain, Alexis DeVell, Shayla LaVeaux, Kaylan Nicole, Jewel, Emma Nixon]
12/4/11	We’ve heard a horrible rumor that some places out there have to deal with this bizarre phenomenon called “snow” — which basically sounds like a euphemism for “frozen water that can make life hell” if you want to know the truth. Having seen pictures of it on the news, we can tell you: It looks icky. We did want you to know, however, that we do have how own version of Snow out here, though, although admittedly ours happens to be of the “Aurora Snow” variety. … So you know what we call our Northern Lights? … Yep! … Aurora Areolas. (Sorry. We blame the cold — wherever it may be.) [FEATURED TAGS: Aurora Snow, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Phoenix Ray, Jessica Drake]
12/1/11	Anyone can do an interview, but very, very few people can do a “Ninnterview” as you’ll see easily. Also, anyone can crash a wedding, but only Cytherea can do it … well … like Cytherea does. And if these two quick introductions don’t make you want to see what’s on tap for today, then perhaps you should make an appointment with your family physician. You don’t feel well. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Brea Bennett Video, Jana Jordan Video, Renee Perez Video, Cassidey Video, Nikki Kane Video, Jennifer Dark, Alexis Love, Michael Ninn]

November 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

11/27/11	However you define it, we have a lot to be thankful for around here this year. Shayla and Cytherea have launched themselves into their sites with happy (and often naked) abandon. Maverick continues to evolve with 247AdultStars.com, and Michael finally won his David and Goliath battle against the (allegedly) evil 800-lb gorilla of a corporate powerhouse. D.Minion continues in her inimitable way, which turns out to be fairly safe to say, because as far as we know, no one has ever tried to imitate her, actually. … As for this end of our first (and with any luck last) Thanksgiving Weekend Blast, we’re spreading a little Love today. Now we all look forward to going back to work, because this vacation has been killing us. … By the way, if you read the last four (large) first letters of each post, it turns out it spells “Ho Ho” proving a long-held philosophy around here: At the very least, we amuse ourselves. [STAR TAGS: Heather Vuur Video, Heather Vandeven Video, Justine Joli Video, Faith Leon Video, Exclusive Video, Michael Ninn]
11/26/11	Out in the “real world” it can be pretty difficult to find someone that will staunchly defend the intellect of a person that has chosen a profession in the adult industry. You show us a parent thrilled that their daughter picked “Porn Star” as a career choice, and we’ll show you someone in dire need of rehab of one sort or another. Of course, almost none of these “real” people have ever met Shayla LaVeaux, and that’s a pity. Now naturally we realize the irony in pitying someone that at best pities us, but we enjoy irony. It gets rid of all the wrinkles. [STAR TAGS: Haley Paige Video]
11/25/11	Honestly we don’t even know if the term “Black Friday” qualifies as Politically Correct anymore, although the media seems comfortable enough with it. Apparently we can use colors to describe anything except people — unless they’re white, in which case some other set of rules apply entirely. Of course that being the case has probably caused all the confusion and distress in the first place, so there’s that. Well, we happily avoid this controversy completely today, as we welcome Maverick and 247AdultStars with an entirely new section of his site, although as far as we know he has not as yet assigned a color to it. Best we should remember that the last item in Pandora’s Box happened to be “Hope” perhaps. Although thankfully whether or not that falls into the “Evil” category also remains outside our little scope on this day. [STAR TAGS: Cate Harrington, 247AdultStars.com]
11/24/11	Only in Los Angeles can you see a bumper sticker that reads, “Enjoy your Health. Eat Organic!” as you ride behind a 30-yr-old foreign car belching malodorous black smoke into the air. … On the other hand, there happen to be many different things that we can in fact be thankful for today, so that will be our plan. [STAR TAGS: Happy Thanksgiving!]
11/19/11	So the plan was to put up this “get ready for Vegas in January” post at 11:11 on 11/11/11, since those don’t happen very often. It was a great plan, devised with meticulous care, cultivated with rapt devotion, and prepared fully for bountiful harvest. (See? Sometimes we don’t mix metaphors.) …Yeah, well, and then we forgot. It seems we prepared too early and scared ourselves. … That happens. … Consequently we decided to put it up at 11:19 on 11/19/11 because, hey, it’s still full of prime numbers. That has to count for something. We’ll try to pay more attention on the next 11/11/11. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Cytherea Exclusive Video, Cheyenne Silver Exclusive Video]
11/17/11	We would have to admit that Much Ado About Nothing has significantly more literary merit than you will likely find inside the Members’ Area today. That said, our own “Much Ado About Cytherea” has a heck of a lot more to offer in terms of pure illustration. Also, we find reason to give you some really sneaky news about one of our friends, and we tap Renee Perez to do so — also very illustrative, by the way. … OK, so “pure” might not be the appropriate adjective, perhaps, but we’ve never been big on being appropriate anyway. What’s the point? [STAR TAGS: Renee Perez Video, Cytherea, Michael Ninn]
11/12/11	Most of us are too young to remember reading the instructions on one of the world’s very first video games, but we have recently learned that they provided the following guidance: 1. Insert quarter. 2. Avoid Klingons. … A unique beauty can exist in simplicity, can it not? So with that humble aim in mind, we wish our good friend Wendy Divine a Happy Birthday today. As for D.Minion’s contribution, well, let’s just go with “unique” for that as well. [STAR TAGS: Wendy Divine]
11/9/11	If you have any chance at all of taking the day off tomorrow so that you can see Cytherea venture into the Cam Show world at 11:00 am (California time), you might want to take that step. Obviously we can never be sure when someone may read these little notices, what with them staying up historically for more than a decade, so just to be clear: Thursday, November 10, 2011 – 2:00 pm EST – Cytherea CAM SHOW! Get there from the “Sweet Fantasy Cams” link on her site. Oh, and if you’re waiting around for the show to start, you might want to consider Film School as our buddy Lorraine Sisco has done. [STAR TAGS: Adriana Sage]
11/6/11	Today happens to be D.Minion’s favorite day of the year — at least as far as days go where she doesn’t get to order milk in a bar and embarrass the rest of us. As you may or may not have noticed, the majority of American clocks “fell back” early this morning, thus meaning that DM could sleep an extra hour (at least without feeling guilty). … Now this may seem an odd introduction, but if you come up with a better one to talk about Shayla playing with whips and chains, you just send it on in. We’ll switch this one out. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video, Roxanne Hall Video]
11/3/11	Just when you think you’ve heard everything, right? … Apparently a professional football player got arrested in Boston on Halloween night for “indecent battery” as the media reported it. Now pro athletes doing monumentally stupid, even illegal, things comes as no surprise to anyone, and you certainly can’t go around groping whomever you feel like on a dance floor, but did the state of Massachusetts ever consider that having such a law on the books seems to imply that such a thing as “decent battery” exists? Fortunately someone allegedly much smarter than those of us around here has to figure all that out while we can concentrate on the actual A.J. Bailey and Capri Anderson. For what it’s worth, we’ll let you know now that their groping is a whole lot better than decent. [STAR TAGS: Capri Anderson Video, AJ Bailey Video, Michael Ninn]