Filed Under: Renee Perez

December 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

12/31/11	As near as we can tell, today happens to be New Year’s eve, and most places around the world happen to celebrate the new year with substantially more vigor and glee than they do any of those gift-giving holidays. Of course the vast majority of the world has at least a culture, but often an entire political system, that stems in no small degree from religious persecution, so maybe that makes sense. After all, it seems very wise to focus more on a day of the year you won’t get shot for celebrating, right? For our part, we have decided to stick to our roots as well. What they lack in historic violence and upheaval, they more than make up for in fun and nudity. This doesn’t set the bar very high, we understand, but as a rule we tend to prefer simple goals. (You members may have noticed.) And if D.Minion happens to discover our camouflaged secret, well, we plan on employing the exact same New Year’s Resolution we enjoy every year: Blame Maverick for everything. [FEATURED TAGS: Georgia Adair Video]
12/27/11	People do sometimes contribute to their own “Birthday Party” as Shayla has decided to do so today. True to at least our form, she chose to celebrate “Holliday” over the Holidays, and offers up some insights as to what it’s like being in the middle of 30 or 40 women all having sex together. Sadly, none of us here can really comment on this experience first-hand, but we do have a great many folks willing to learn. We value education, after all. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video, Kylie Ireland Video, Serenity Video, Juli Ashton Video, Nina Hartley Video, Shawna Lenee]
12/25/11	So did you sleep with thoughts of Sugar-Plums dancing through your head? Have you ever done that in your whole life? Would you even know a Sugar-Plum if it jumped out of the closet and bit you? And when is the last time you heard anyone exclaim, “My! What a clatter!” anyway? The fact that people around here spend time pondering such weighty issues serves as the only excuse I can think of for this Merry Christmas … um … Members’ Card. I worry about us sometimes. I really do. [FEATURED TAGS: Merry Christmas!]
12/24/11	You may not find it intuitive, but the adult movie industry happens to display a great deal of holiday cheer among its members. Of course you can’t really have a properly caroling environment without Ebenezer Scrooge, and thus we speak today with sincere affection for our friend Gregory Dark. True, we have chosen to do so with the able assistance of Juli Ashton, Kelly O’Dell, Felecia, and Serenity, but in our defense we claimed to be festive — not foolish. Why listen to some old fat guy that’s not planning on dropping down any chimneys tonight when you fill your silent nights with young ladies clearly coming about midnight? … There are way too many seasonal songs to consider. We’d best stop now. [FEATURED TAGS: Juli Ashton Video, Kelly O’Dell Video, Felecia Video, Serenity Video]
12/21/11	This is the time of year where we all get a little nostalgic; we all feel a little more optimistic, a little more peaceful. Benevolent tendencies, long hidden throughout the year, come closer to the surface, and we allow ourselves to pause a few more times during the day, just to feel a part of Mother Earth. … Or if you happen to be like us, you praise Rednecks everywhere, and wonder why everyone doesn’t celebrate the way we do. You forgive them, however, because let’s face it: If you go around saying everything you really think, no one is ever going to give you a gift — at least not one you’ll want to receive. [FEATURED TAGS: Anais, Georgia Adair, Angel Cassidy, Wanda Curtis, Michael Ninn, Bree Olsen Video, Sunny Leone Video]
12/19/11	We all know ‘Tis the Season of Giving, but let’s be honest, it’s pretty fun to get new things too. And with any luck they won’t be the sorts of things that will live in a closet until next year when we can give them again. In a typically benevolent re-gifting game, then, we have decided to offer up some holiday gift suggestions before we shuttle everyone off to enjoy Cytherea playing fauna amongst the flora. D.Minion “naturally” adds her special touch, although DM can be a lot like a gift from a distant relative: You honestly appreciate it, but you’re just not quite sure how to explain it to anyone. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video]
12/15/11	Rarely do we link directly to 247AdultStars.com — preferring rather to heighten anticipation, sweeten the experience, and generally make it more pleasantly pithy. … It’s either that or we pretty much like any excuse to show off more naked women. Theories may vary. All of this goes by the wayside this season, however, as Dear Maverick, being from London and thus used to a depressing Christmas season until the very last minute, has seen fit to visit a few ghosts on a couple of Brit Porn Stars and convince them to film a special holiday greeting for the members. You know what? … God Bless Us, Every One … [FEATURED TAGS: Anna Joy Exclusive Video, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
12/10/11	Contrary to D.Minion’s contention in the office, after making egg nog, they do not in fact use the rest of the animal to create Naugahyde seat covers. We try to be helpful with our insights here, just so no one gets confused as they go through life. You might consider, then, taking D.Minion’s view of Day Two of Ninn Worx’ House of Jordan shoot with a grain of salt — if not an entire spice rack. None of this detracts, however, from the 241 stellar photographs. … And how do we know these to be stellar photographs? Why all these women are stars, of course. [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Jordan, Alexis Love, Tiffany Sweet, Carli Banks, Michael Ninn]
12/7/11	You know those kind of “entertainment” things where folks get really sort of devious and sneak in little bits and pieces that presumably will teach us something? Sure, they couch it all in some general “Oh, my goodness, but this is a lot of fun!” sort of way, but it always sort of sounds like Tom Sawyer and that fence painting job? … You will be happy to know that for our part we are simply celebrating Chasey Lain’s birthday today, and if anyone learns anything, well, dang that ain’t our fault. How can porno be educational anyway? [FEATURED TAGS: Chasey Lain, Alexis DeVell, Shayla LaVeaux, Kaylan Nicole, Jewel, Emma Nixon]
12/4/11	We’ve heard a horrible rumor that some places out there have to deal with this bizarre phenomenon called “snow” — which basically sounds like a euphemism for “frozen water that can make life hell” if you want to know the truth. Having seen pictures of it on the news, we can tell you: It looks icky. We did want you to know, however, that we do have how own version of Snow out here, though, although admittedly ours happens to be of the “Aurora Snow” variety. … So you know what we call our Northern Lights? … Yep! … Aurora Areolas. (Sorry. We blame the cold — wherever it may be.) [FEATURED TAGS: Aurora Snow, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Phoenix Ray, Jessica Drake]
12/1/11	Anyone can do an interview, but very, very few people can do a “Ninnterview” as you’ll see easily. Also, anyone can crash a wedding, but only Cytherea can do it … well … like Cytherea does. And if these two quick introductions don’t make you want to see what’s on tap for today, then perhaps you should make an appointment with your family physician. You don’t feel well. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Brea Bennett Video, Jana Jordan Video, Renee Perez Video, Cassidey Video, Nikki Kane Video, Jennifer Dark, Alexis Love, Michael Ninn]

November 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

11/27/11	However you define it, we have a lot to be thankful for around here this year. Shayla and Cytherea have launched themselves into their sites with happy (and often naked) abandon. Maverick continues to evolve with 247AdultStars.com, and Michael finally won his David and Goliath battle against the (allegedly) evil 800-lb gorilla of a corporate powerhouse. D.Minion continues in her inimitable way, which turns out to be fairly safe to say, because as far as we know, no one has ever tried to imitate her, actually. … As for this end of our first (and with any luck last) Thanksgiving Weekend Blast, we’re spreading a little Love today. Now we all look forward to going back to work, because this vacation has been killing us. … By the way, if you read the last four (large) first letters of each post, it turns out it spells “Ho Ho” proving a long-held philosophy around here: At the very least, we amuse ourselves. [STAR TAGS: Heather Vuur Video, Heather Vandeven Video, Justine Joli Video, Faith Leon Video, Exclusive Video, Michael Ninn]
11/26/11	Out in the “real world” it can be pretty difficult to find someone that will staunchly defend the intellect of a person that has chosen a profession in the adult industry. You show us a parent thrilled that their daughter picked “Porn Star” as a career choice, and we’ll show you someone in dire need of rehab of one sort or another. Of course, almost none of these “real” people have ever met Shayla LaVeaux, and that’s a pity. Now naturally we realize the irony in pitying someone that at best pities us, but we enjoy irony. It gets rid of all the wrinkles. [STAR TAGS: Haley Paige Video]
11/25/11	Honestly we don’t even know if the term “Black Friday” qualifies as Politically Correct anymore, although the media seems comfortable enough with it. Apparently we can use colors to describe anything except people — unless they’re white, in which case some other set of rules apply entirely. Of course that being the case has probably caused all the confusion and distress in the first place, so there’s that. Well, we happily avoid this controversy completely today, as we welcome Maverick and 247AdultStars with an entirely new section of his site, although as far as we know he has not as yet assigned a color to it. Best we should remember that the last item in Pandora’s Box happened to be “Hope” perhaps. Although thankfully whether or not that falls into the “Evil” category also remains outside our little scope on this day. [STAR TAGS: Cate Harrington, 247AdultStars.com]
11/24/11	Only in Los Angeles can you see a bumper sticker that reads, “Enjoy your Health. Eat Organic!” as you ride behind a 30-yr-old foreign car belching malodorous black smoke into the air. … On the other hand, there happen to be many different things that we can in fact be thankful for today, so that will be our plan. [STAR TAGS: Happy Thanksgiving!]
11/19/11	So the plan was to put up this “get ready for Vegas in January” post at 11:11 on 11/11/11, since those don’t happen very often. It was a great plan, devised with meticulous care, cultivated with rapt devotion, and prepared fully for bountiful harvest. (See? Sometimes we don’t mix metaphors.) …Yeah, well, and then we forgot. It seems we prepared too early and scared ourselves. … That happens. … Consequently we decided to put it up at 11:19 on 11/19/11 because, hey, it’s still full of prime numbers. That has to count for something. We’ll try to pay more attention on the next 11/11/11. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Cytherea Exclusive Video, Cheyenne Silver Exclusive Video]
11/17/11	We would have to admit that Much Ado About Nothing has significantly more literary merit than you will likely find inside the Members’ Area today. That said, our own “Much Ado About Cytherea” has a heck of a lot more to offer in terms of pure illustration. Also, we find reason to give you some really sneaky news about one of our friends, and we tap Renee Perez to do so — also very illustrative, by the way. … OK, so “pure” might not be the appropriate adjective, perhaps, but we’ve never been big on being appropriate anyway. What’s the point? [STAR TAGS: Renee Perez Video, Cytherea, Michael Ninn]
11/12/11	Most of us are too young to remember reading the instructions on one of the world’s very first video games, but we have recently learned that they provided the following guidance: 1. Insert quarter. 2. Avoid Klingons. … A unique beauty can exist in simplicity, can it not? So with that humble aim in mind, we wish our good friend Wendy Divine a Happy Birthday today. As for D.Minion’s contribution, well, let’s just go with “unique” for that as well. [STAR TAGS: Wendy Divine]
11/9/11	If you have any chance at all of taking the day off tomorrow so that you can see Cytherea venture into the Cam Show world at 11:00 am (California time), you might want to take that step. Obviously we can never be sure when someone may read these little notices, what with them staying up historically for more than a decade, so just to be clear: Thursday, November 10, 2011 – 2:00 pm EST – Cytherea CAM SHOW! Get there from the “Sweet Fantasy Cams” link on her site. Oh, and if you’re waiting around for the show to start, you might want to consider Film School as our buddy Lorraine Sisco has done. [STAR TAGS: Adriana Sage]
11/6/11	Today happens to be D.Minion’s favorite day of the year — at least as far as days go where she doesn’t get to order milk in a bar and embarrass the rest of us. As you may or may not have noticed, the majority of American clocks “fell back” early this morning, thus meaning that DM could sleep an extra hour (at least without feeling guilty). … Now this may seem an odd introduction, but if you come up with a better one to talk about Shayla playing with whips and chains, you just send it on in. We’ll switch this one out. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video, Roxanne Hall Video]
11/3/11	Just when you think you’ve heard everything, right? … Apparently a professional football player got arrested in Boston on Halloween night for “indecent battery” as the media reported it. Now pro athletes doing monumentally stupid, even illegal, things comes as no surprise to anyone, and you certainly can’t go around groping whomever you feel like on a dance floor, but did the state of Massachusetts ever consider that having such a law on the books seems to imply that such a thing as “decent battery” exists? Fortunately someone allegedly much smarter than those of us around here has to figure all that out while we can concentrate on the actual A.J. Bailey and Capri Anderson. For what it’s worth, we’ll let you know now that their groping is a whole lot better than decent. [STAR TAGS: Capri Anderson Video, AJ Bailey Video, Michael Ninn]

Year:2011

Month:November

Finally “Fore” on The Four

We promised our good friends over at Adam & Eve that we would sneak in a mention here that if you know where to look, you can actually get your own copy of Michael Ninn’s The Four a full couple of months before it officially becomes available. … Not to be TOO sneaky about it, […]

Stars:Renee Perez

Location:Los Angeles

Setting:Movie Set

Technique:Professional

October 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

10/31/11	Remember when the “Little Monsters” visiting us this evening just meant there were a bunch of small people in costume going door to door obtaining free candy under threat of dirty deeds? Now, according to some of the … let’s go with less aged … among our office staff, a “Little Monster” might mean simply that the individual in question happens to be a fan of Lady Gaga. When did that happen? We missed the memo. … If you want to have some fun tonight, when the beggars come ringing your doorbell with their already sugar-filled bags thrust forward, choose “Trick!” and see what happens. If you can’t educate the young, what fun is life anyway? … Of course if you’d rather have an altogether different kind of fun tonight, just give ’em the candy so you can get back to our “Gothic Cheerleader” courtesy of Cytherea. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video]
10/29/11	No one here will admit responsibility for the apparent “poetry bug” that has bitten the writers around here, but as is our custom, we have made it quite easy to just skip to the … let’s go with more visual … presentations. After all, while it may take some education to adequately consider Shakespeare, it hardly takes a college degree to see the benefits of Shayla LaVeaux and Olivia Del Rio “virtually” … let’s go with working. Come to think of it, let’s just go … . [FEATURED TAGS: Eddie Van Halen, Jassie, Heather Vurr, Heather Vandeven, Monica Mayhem, Michael Ninn, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Olivia Del Rio Video ]
10/26/11	Certainly most of us would come to the aid of a Damsel in Distress — at least one would hope. Yet what percentage of us would take the time to explain Distress in Damsels when at the end of the written explanation comes Monique Alexander and Tori Black? … See? Don’t you just hate those philosophical puzzles? … Fortunately there will be no test today. Truthfully you don’t even need to pay attention to all the pesky words in the way of the beautiful women (although please don’t tell the copywriters because they’re very sensitive). And since we are being honest, we should mention that we find it pretty hard to imagine either Monique or Tori being in “distress” for very long. Right? [FEATURED TAGS: Monique Alexander Video, Tori Black Video, Michael Ninn]
10/23/11	Apparently “blonds have more fun” as they go through life. Assuming that true, then Jaclyn Smith (followed recently by Minka Kelly) would be much more alluring would they only dye their hair, right? Uh-huh. Have we mentioned the beautiful ocean-front property just outside of Denver we’re trying to sell? … Well, we don’t often get the chance to talk about one woman with experience in both “lifestyles” in adult movies, but when we do, we jump at the chance. OK. So that fact that A.J. Bailey happens to be brilliant too doesn’t hurt anything. Hey, when she gets old, she’ll still be smart. [FEATURED TAGS: AJ Bailey Video, Capri Anderson Video, Helmetcam Audio, Michael Ninn]
10/22/11	Theoretically, taking “the road less travelled” will make all the difference. Of course, have you ever noticed that no one ever mentions whether or not that difference will turn out to be a good thing? Life comes down to a matter of defining your perspective and then setting priorities; it’s really not any more complicated than that. For our part, we always seem to choose the path filled with naked women. They’re probably more philosophical or something. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Dee Video, Georgia Adair Video, Tasha Reign, Sarah Vandella, Kagney Linn Karter, Alexis Texas, Michael Ninn]
10/18/11	So a Haiku, a Fairy Tale, and a Limerick walk into a web site … No, really. … That’s what actually happens today. … We can’t really say “why” necessarily, because that would involve trying to understand D.Minion’s rationale, and we can assure you: Down that road disaster lies. … On a more — let’s go with typically sane — route, we do at least get to show off Shayla cavorting in our small town on California’s Central Coast. Better yet, Shayla has chosen to do so with a distinct lack of clothing for the most part, although she does seem to take advantage of batteries purchased locally. We’ve even thrown in some of those fancy “movin’ pictures” displaying a similar sort of cavorting, even though the scene has nothing technically to do with the poems. Internally we’ve entitled this bit of fun “The Lingerie Toss and Other Tales” but you may be more interested in the “Pure Gold Pussy” once all is said and done. Basically we know what we’ve done, but we have no idea what DM has said. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video]
10/16/11	All things considered, we have a pretty good life around here. Granted the abundance of beautiful naked women around does tend to slant the playing field in our favor, but we have deeply spiritual — metaphysically philosophical, even — reasons to be grateful for our lot in life. Well, at least we plan on having those, just as soon as the beautiful naked women stop working as sole justification. Hey, without a plan, how can you tell when you’ve fallen horribly short? … And the plan for today? Georgia Adair and Dee, beautiful and naked as you likely expected. Honestly, adding enough deeply spiritual and metaphysical philosophy, it adds a whole new interpretation to the concept of the NFL “bye” week. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Dee Video, Georgia Adair Video, Michael Ninn]
10/10/11	Columbus Day seemed like the perfect opportunity to talk about the potential benefits of exploration, particularly as they may pertain to Cytherea. Truth be told, we cannot be 100% sure what exactly we will “discover” on our trek, but we remain optimistic. According to Mr. Orwell, should we strive to be admirable writers, we need “let the meaning choose the word, and not the other way about.” As to the effectiveness of our efforts today, we shall let the members decide. … And just a bit of advice for members and non-members alike: Remember what we have learned from Mr. Columbus. Be really careful if you’re screwing the Queen. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Jana Jordan Video, Alana Langford Video, Michael Ninn]
10/7/11	For a long time now, we’ve been planning to celebrate the release of the next Michael Ninn movie we can talk about and show off with the last Michael Ninn movies (we could talk about and show off) — these happening right before new Ninn Worx management felt “uncomfortable” with our presence. Consequently, on the precipice of some very select customers in the U.S. being able to obtain a copy of Michael’s The Four, we bring you for the first time D.Minion’s observations of the first day of House of Jordan. We’ve entitled this episode “Who Let the Dogs Out?” — which will make a lot more sense once you read it. … OK. So that may not be entirely true. … It will make as much sense as we usually make. There. [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Jordan, Renee Perez, Lena Nicole, Marlie Moore, Alana Langford, Michael Ninn]
10/2/11	Sigh. The plan was to put this up on Sunday night … and then … depression set in. On the stripes of the gridiron the only thing that makes the Colorado professional football team better than Colorado’s biggest college football team is that the college team has played one more game, thus recording one more loss. Many might assume that being from a state even colder than Colorado, say, Wisconsin, would be a fine reason for depression of an entirely more aggregate view. But you if you happen to be a football fan, Wisconsin’s not a bad place to be. … Still, we’re trying to cope the way we do. Too bad Uncle Gibby’s not allowed to look at the video here. He would have liked it — a lot. [FEATURED TAGS: Lexi Belle, Monique Alexander, Anais Video, Michael Ninn]