Filed Under: Shayla LaVeaux

October 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

10/31/11	Remember when the “Little Monsters” visiting us this evening just meant there were a bunch of small people in costume going door to door obtaining free candy under threat of dirty deeds? Now, according to some of the … let’s go with less aged … among our office staff, a “Little Monster” might mean simply that the individual in question happens to be a fan of Lady Gaga. When did that happen? We missed the memo. … If you want to have some fun tonight, when the beggars come ringing your doorbell with their already sugar-filled bags thrust forward, choose “Trick!” and see what happens. If you can’t educate the young, what fun is life anyway? … Of course if you’d rather have an altogether different kind of fun tonight, just give ’em the candy so you can get back to our “Gothic Cheerleader” courtesy of Cytherea. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video]
10/29/11	No one here will admit responsibility for the apparent “poetry bug” that has bitten the writers around here, but as is our custom, we have made it quite easy to just skip to the … let’s go with more visual … presentations. After all, while it may take some education to adequately consider Shakespeare, it hardly takes a college degree to see the benefits of Shayla LaVeaux and Olivia Del Rio “virtually” … let’s go with working. Come to think of it, let’s just go … . [FEATURED TAGS: Eddie Van Halen, Jassie, Heather Vurr, Heather Vandeven, Monica Mayhem, Michael Ninn, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Olivia Del Rio Video ]
10/26/11	Certainly most of us would come to the aid of a Damsel in Distress — at least one would hope. Yet what percentage of us would take the time to explain Distress in Damsels when at the end of the written explanation comes Monique Alexander and Tori Black? … See? Don’t you just hate those philosophical puzzles? … Fortunately there will be no test today. Truthfully you don’t even need to pay attention to all the pesky words in the way of the beautiful women (although please don’t tell the copywriters because they’re very sensitive). And since we are being honest, we should mention that we find it pretty hard to imagine either Monique or Tori being in “distress” for very long. Right? [FEATURED TAGS: Monique Alexander Video, Tori Black Video, Michael Ninn]
10/23/11	Apparently “blonds have more fun” as they go through life. Assuming that true, then Jaclyn Smith (followed recently by Minka Kelly) would be much more alluring would they only dye their hair, right? Uh-huh. Have we mentioned the beautiful ocean-front property just outside of Denver we’re trying to sell? … Well, we don’t often get the chance to talk about one woman with experience in both “lifestyles” in adult movies, but when we do, we jump at the chance. OK. So that fact that A.J. Bailey happens to be brilliant too doesn’t hurt anything. Hey, when she gets old, she’ll still be smart. [FEATURED TAGS: AJ Bailey Video, Capri Anderson Video, Helmetcam Audio, Michael Ninn]
10/22/11	Theoretically, taking “the road less travelled” will make all the difference. Of course, have you ever noticed that no one ever mentions whether or not that difference will turn out to be a good thing? Life comes down to a matter of defining your perspective and then setting priorities; it’s really not any more complicated than that. For our part, we always seem to choose the path filled with naked women. They’re probably more philosophical or something. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Dee Video, Georgia Adair Video, Tasha Reign, Sarah Vandella, Kagney Linn Karter, Alexis Texas, Michael Ninn]
10/18/11	So a Haiku, a Fairy Tale, and a Limerick walk into a web site … No, really. … That’s what actually happens today. … We can’t really say “why” necessarily, because that would involve trying to understand D.Minion’s rationale, and we can assure you: Down that road disaster lies. … On a more — let’s go with typically sane — route, we do at least get to show off Shayla cavorting in our small town on California’s Central Coast. Better yet, Shayla has chosen to do so with a distinct lack of clothing for the most part, although she does seem to take advantage of batteries purchased locally. We’ve even thrown in some of those fancy “movin’ pictures” displaying a similar sort of cavorting, even though the scene has nothing technically to do with the poems. Internally we’ve entitled this bit of fun “The Lingerie Toss and Other Tales” but you may be more interested in the “Pure Gold Pussy” once all is said and done. Basically we know what we’ve done, but we have no idea what DM has said. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video]
10/16/11	All things considered, we have a pretty good life around here. Granted the abundance of beautiful naked women around does tend to slant the playing field in our favor, but we have deeply spiritual — metaphysically philosophical, even — reasons to be grateful for our lot in life. Well, at least we plan on having those, just as soon as the beautiful naked women stop working as sole justification. Hey, without a plan, how can you tell when you’ve fallen horribly short? … And the plan for today? Georgia Adair and Dee, beautiful and naked as you likely expected. Honestly, adding enough deeply spiritual and metaphysical philosophy, it adds a whole new interpretation to the concept of the NFL “bye” week. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Dee Video, Georgia Adair Video, Michael Ninn]
10/10/11	Columbus Day seemed like the perfect opportunity to talk about the potential benefits of exploration, particularly as they may pertain to Cytherea. Truth be told, we cannot be 100% sure what exactly we will “discover” on our trek, but we remain optimistic. According to Mr. Orwell, should we strive to be admirable writers, we need “let the meaning choose the word, and not the other way about.” As to the effectiveness of our efforts today, we shall let the members decide. … And just a bit of advice for members and non-members alike: Remember what we have learned from Mr. Columbus. Be really careful if you’re screwing the Queen. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Jana Jordan Video, Alana Langford Video, Michael Ninn]
10/7/11	For a long time now, we’ve been planning to celebrate the release of the next Michael Ninn movie we can talk about and show off with the last Michael Ninn movies (we could talk about and show off) — these happening right before new Ninn Worx management felt “uncomfortable” with our presence. Consequently, on the precipice of some very select customers in the U.S. being able to obtain a copy of Michael’s The Four, we bring you for the first time D.Minion’s observations of the first day of House of Jordan. We’ve entitled this episode “Who Let the Dogs Out?” — which will make a lot more sense once you read it. … OK. So that may not be entirely true. … It will make as much sense as we usually make. There. [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Jordan, Renee Perez, Lena Nicole, Marlie Moore, Alana Langford, Michael Ninn]
10/2/11	Sigh. The plan was to put this up on Sunday night … and then … depression set in. On the stripes of the gridiron the only thing that makes the Colorado professional football team better than Colorado’s biggest college football team is that the college team has played one more game, thus recording one more loss. Many might assume that being from a state even colder than Colorado, say, Wisconsin, would be a fine reason for depression of an entirely more aggregate view. But you if you happen to be a football fan, Wisconsin’s not a bad place to be. … Still, we’re trying to cope the way we do. Too bad Uncle Gibby’s not allowed to look at the video here. He would have liked it — a lot. [FEATURED TAGS: Lexi Belle, Monique Alexander, Anais Video, Michael Ninn]

September 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

9/27/11	You take your basic adult video site, and you start talking about video of “pie” and all kinds of naughty things most likely come to mind. While Cytherea and her CyCAM certainly fit that bill, we will warn you that D.Minion has once again outdone herself with her “Eye in the Pie” interpretation. Don’t worry too much, however, as we can assure you that even this oddness has nothing whatsoever to do with 3.14159265 … [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video]
9/24/11	We theorize that you members have been keeping up with all the Risque Commune sites over the past week and a half. Because you have learned this a valuable effort, you have thus already seen Cytherea playing naturally au naturel in nature, Shayla being her naturally friendly self while “Going Down, Down Under” … and Maverick of 247AdultStars fame (yeah, well, sort of) turning a quite natural shade of purple in the presence of naked females. You have already seen all this so we don’t even need to mention it. If you have somehow lost your mind recently and have not been paying commune-wide attention, well fear not, we have linked you pleasantly today. And we’ve thrown in a study of Bijou Not Being Bitter as well. We think maybe she doesn’t understand that word. … And in case you’re wondering, we “theorize” all of this because we know what “assume” can do. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Jessica Drake Video, Dolorean Video, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, Dee, Wendy Divine, Kristal Summers, Keri Windsor, 247AdultStars.com]
9/13/11	Gloom has befallen fully half of the NFL fans as of very late last night, or very early this morning, depending upon where you call home. The other half of the fans, as one might expect, find themselves rejuvenated, thoughts of evil union disputes pushed far into the ancient history parts of there minds. … Then there are the other people who have somehow managed to avoid the clutches of American Football Frenzy and find accounts of lesbian sexual interaction far more appealing. Sometimes it can be hard to understand any of these extremes, however, but if you think about it, it remains far easier to contemplate why someone might be interested in beautiful naked females than it does to fathom how some people can get distressingly worked up over a game. Those people should probably search for “Gloom, despair, and agony on me” replays on YouTube. [FEATURED TAGS: Angie Savage Exclusive Video, Angelina Valentine Exclusive Video, Holly Sampson, Juelz Ventura]
9/10/11	As it turns out, no one was keeping the home fires burning during our recent trip to cover Adam & Eve’s Dallas — experience. On the other hand, some attentive person decided to provide a great deal of fire for us at our temporary location. Honestly in this case we’d rather not have relied on the kindness of strangers. And for a town named “Sweet Water” they sure didn’t seem to have much of it actually available locally. Go figure. [FEATURED TAGS: Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
9/7/11	Depending upon when you happen to be reading this, you may find that we are technically “before” September 7th. However, since we’re taking all the new folks in the office down to L.A. to cover the Adam & Eve “Parody” of Dallas this week, we thought we’d get this up before we left so people weren’t sad in our absence. Of course you could be reading this at some point in the future, so this distinction won’t mean anything at all to you. Just understand that time remains a wholly relative concept around here, and you’ll be fine. If you find yourself still confused, ask “eno” on the Message Board. He can explain it. … Oh! Cougars & Coeds – part 1. … [FEATURED TAGS: Shyla Styles, Ruby Rayes]
9/4/11	Someone told us recently that “It’s better to be implacable than wise.” He claims to have read it in a book, and it may even be true. Were we wise enough to know what implacable means, we might even be able to comment with more insight, but sadly most of us here lack the tenacity necessary to go and find a dictionary these days. Even dictionary.com takes valuable time away from YouTube where we might enjoy classic Jennifer Beals videos. We all make tough decisions in life. For the record, though, when we grow up, we want to be Uncle Gibby. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Ashton Moore, Dru Berrymore, Jenna Haze, Laurie Wallace, Michelle Michaels, Shay Sights, Star E. Knight, Tanya Danielle, Wanda Curtis, Lexi Belle, Monique Alexander, Nikki Delano, Breanne Benson, Capri Anderson, Sunny Leone, Exxxotica Chicago 2011 Exclusive Video, Michael Ninn]
9/1/11	Finally we find ourselves but one round of meaningless games away from the real NFL season. … That’s what we’re all thinking, right? … It certainly couldn’t be that we have once again in our lives been distracted by large-breasted females. That couldn’t happen yet again, could it? … No way. We are dedicated and seasoned professionals, in no way susceptible to confusion generated by simple biological quirks. … And if you believe that, you really needn’t bother with today’s post. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Michael Ninn]

August 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

8/28/11	The best way to test the skills of a person trying to do a new job tends to be comparing the way they do the exact same thing as someone else has done. Like most philosophical principles, however, it tends to be difficult to test, since setting up the “exact” same task can be functionally impossible. Life simply has too many variables. Fortunately for us at risque.com some constants do exist, and we have people who have been around long enough to remember them. We’d never be so boring as to attempt a mere “Apples to Apples” analysis, however. Nope. We much prefer the “Cytherea to Cytherea” algorithm. We’re clever that way. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Missy Monroe, Jenna Presley, Angela Stone, Michael Ninn]
8/27/11	Occasionally in life you find yourself in a situation where your most sophisticated intellectual response follows generally along the lines of, “Huh. That’s odd. I wonder what in the world possessed them to do that.” … And then hopefully you do something worthwhile, like eat chocolate chocolate-chip ice cream or something. Today just might be one of those days, but when you have Shayla LaVeaux, Raquel Devine and various other miscellaneous pretty people to help you with your ruminations, you probably won’t mind very much. You will need to supply your own ice cream, however. We can only do so much. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Raquel Devine, Katsuni, Miko Lee, Olivia Del Rio Video]
8/23/11	Be careful what you wish for. And while we’re on the topic of simple advice that people almost never listen to, you might be careful about the examples you’re setting for others in life. Dedicated (or perhaps more Devious) students might take advantage of an opening to provide some teaching of their own — which the teacher will almost certainly ignore, of course. Could it be that Lessons Learned are not in fact like Bridges Burned; or could it be that “learned” doesn’t really mean what we think it means? … It’s a good thing we don’t do philosophy for a living on risque. It’s hard. … Well, we do “do” hard, but that’s a different story. [FEATURED TAGS: Renee Perez Video, Sabrina Rose Video, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com, Michael Ninn]
8/20/11	Well a warden didn’t throw a party in the county jail — at least not for anyone we know, which doesn’t say much because we don’t actually know anyone in the country jail — so we had to modify the song allusion to “Jailhouse Walk” for our purposes today. If Elvis had not died back in 1977 he would be 76 now, as all of those people remembering the anniversary of his death kept telling us this week. Of course we responded by pointing out that if Duke Albert of Austria hadn’t died on the same date, he’d be 653 today. None of that has anything whatsoever to do with Cytherea or Katja Kean, however, a fact that probably makes members feel a lot better about coming inside. [FEATURED TAGS: Katja Kean, Cytherea Video, Michael Ninn]
8/17/11	One of the exceptional benefits of having an intelligent, insightful, and interested Membership base stems from the fact that it tends to keep poor, overworked, webmasters focused on task. Of course, should any web minions make an error, a zealous Member might jump upon the oversight, resulting in general feelings of sadness around the office. Over the years we have found a rapid and complete lapse into Denial to be quite a benefit in the recovery process — even if only in the psychological sense. In addition, a quick ratchet into righteous indignation can be helpful. In this case, alas, the intelligent, insightful, and interested Member might actually be correct, so after hours and hours of anguish and pointed despair, we arrived at a fitting Official Response: “Whoops. Dang.” … Honestly descending into proper angst really takes much more devotion and dedicated attention than we were willing to devote to the project. We have many naked women to document; we’re really busy. [FEATURED TAGS: Athena Angel, Shayla LaVeaux Video]
8/14/11	Every once in awhile, no matter how long you’ve been doing something professionally, you can still be surprised — at least if you have fun doing what you do for a living. Differently in this job, most likely, you can accidentally run across a beautiful woman masturbating and it doesn’t result in some mandatory report to Human Resources (a title which takes on an entirely different connotation when you put it in terms of masturbation, actually). Should Aurora Snow be such a woman you might be inclined to comment upon how many people in the country would welcome a little “snow” in their lives right about now. But that wouldn’t be necessary, really. “Beautiful Woman Masturbating” pretty much gets people’s attention without much elaboration. [FEATURED TAGS: Aurora Snow Video, Michael Ninn]
8/13/11	The intricate process of becoming a beautiful model — with professional-level skills — took Anais, well, maybe five or six seconds as it turned out. Some people just seem to be born for the camera. And wouldn’t you know it, we just seem to always have a collection of cameras with us. Ain’t serendipity cool? … Now since this complete (this time) collection of “first time as a professional on camera” photos happened to take place in a fancy bathroom, and since we’re set to the task of reminding everyone to check Shayla.com because Shayla does some bizarre stuff over there, well, this all seemed perfect. Truth be told, though, we honestly can’t remember when an excuse to see Anais (and Shayla) naked came up that didn’t seem perfect. Odd. … [FEATURED TAGS: Anais, Shayla LaVeaux Video]
8/10/11	Chaos surrounds us! France has turned out not to be that reliable of an ally, and people have suddenly realized that the stock market may not be something that we should just play around with on a daily basis. Gosh, who knew? To provide a calming influence, we’re doing a bit of “Dee Constructing” today, providing pithy economic lessons, critical utopian philosophy, and beautiful naked women. Seriously, where can you find a better combination — even on the big ol’ World Wide Web? [FEATURED TAGS: Dee, Inari Vachs, Alektra Blue Video, Jessica Drake Video, Kirsten Price Video, Kaylani Lei Video, Mikayla Mendez Video]
8/6/11	Did you happen to know that a flibbertigibbet refers to what you might more easily recognize as an “airhead” if you tried to have a conversation with one? Now the fact that we’re ruminating upon the vast array of adjectives that have evolved throughout civilization simply to describe stupid people should not worry you at this point. You can just ignore us as usual, and get to the more centered reality of our typical discourse, that being life in the adult movie business. … Yep. Not a flibbertigibbet around here anywhere. We’re a very serious lot. What does “serious” mean again? [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Cassidey, Anna Joy, The Four Trailer Video, Michael Ninn]
8/3/11	Kristal called in the other day, very excited about a series of “Wrestling Videos” she’s set to do with our old friend Tanya Danielle. Rather than correct Dear Ms. Summers by pointing out that “video” would probably not be the technically correct term anymore, D.Minion immediately recalled that she had a photo set of Kristal and Tanya from way back, ironically at another time in her life when our Dear Kristal Summers fell into the Eager Beaver category. Granted we probably didn’t correct Kristal because many of us here still use the term “video” to describe a shoot, but it could have been the thought of soon getting to see Kristal and Tanya naked again. That can be very distracting all on its own you know. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers, Tanya Danielle, Lola, Jade Marcella]

July 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

7/31/11	We could call this something philosophical today – like “Net Benefit” – but that would imply way too much economic thought when considering Maverick’s forays into the summertime debauchery that many, many beers in London can bring if you hang out with porn stars. Come to think of it, we should have learned after all these years not to even try to qualify Maverick with mere words. Pictures are better, and some of the videos aren’t even hopelessly dark. Bonus! [FEATURED TAGS: Sophie O’Brien Exclusive Video, Kimmy Haze, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, Valentina Cruz Exclusive Video, Tracey Lain, Faye Rampton Exclusive Video, Syren Sexton Video, 247AdultStars.com]
7/27/11	So most adult web sites probably don’t mention either Eugene O’Neill or Michael Landon in their typical discourse, and they certainly don’t weave them into the same conversation we’re guessing. That said, we’ve never made any claims to be on even the same planet as typical in this world, and we do talk about Nikki Kane enough that you can just ignore the old dead guys. That would certainly be cheerier. [FEATURED TAGS: Nikki Kane, Michael Ninn]
7/22/11	Many types of people end up in the “adult business” although many of them seem quite unwilling to accept it, or at least acknowledge it publicly. A quick trip through the latest “Novelty” convention has highlighted this little fact that we seem to forget, while Shayla choosing an outfit in which to attend a small-town produce “Festival” seems to demonstrate how seamlessly we adapt to the “regular” world. Overall, we seem to have an easier time with them than they do with us. You’d think they’d take lessons, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux]
7/16/11	You just know you’ve made it as a major society in the History of the World when road construction in one of your major cities makes the international news. Either that, or you know it has been an amazingly slow news day. Well, you’ve got a much less painful option to consider over the weekend, and you won’t even have to think about “Carmageddon” in LA at all. The CyCAM makes its episodic debut today, and while potentially as noteworthy as shutting down the major North/South interstate in Los Angeles, it probably won’t make the television news anywhere. Pity, that. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video]
7/14/11	Possibilities abound in this business in general, and unique potential multiplies geometrically around the risque communes. For example, sometimes the people that came up with the plan for a post don’t happen to be around when the time comes for other people to actually do the work. And sometimes that can be just a tad confusing. On the upside, this particular confusion involves Wendy Divine, Shayla LaVeaux, Aurora Snow, and Jenna Haze all in various states of nakedness. Come to think of it, we could more accurately have described “all of the various states” as completely. That would have worked too. See how confused we get? [FEATURED TAGS: Erotica Los Angeles 2004, Julia Ann, Mika Tan, Nina Hartley, Brittney Skye, Wendy Divine, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Jenna Haze Video, Aurora Snow Video, Michael Ninn]
7/10/11	As the temperatures rise across the country, getting wet seems like a wonderful idea a great deal of the time. Of course when you consider the juxtaposition of Cytherea and “wet” in a single sentence, the relevance of the outside temperature doesn’t really matter all that much. Now if with this introduction you might be forming an opinion as to Cytherea being a meteorologist of some sort, well, you clearly don’t know Cytherea all that well. Take heart (or whatever) in hand, though, for today you may learn much more about her. She loves D.Minion, you know. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Michael Ninn]
7/8/11	Some of us consider our civic duty as males to play the chivalrous role, offering strength, comfort, guidance, and support to any lass potentially in a less than favorable situation. The fact that Uncle Gibby just happened to find himself called into action at a strip club where Bree Olson was headlining, well, that’s just a coincidence. He’s a dedicated lad, that Gibby. Rumor has it he’s also thinking of changing his name to “Jimmy” but you’ll have to follow along inside to understand his rationale. [FEATURED TAGS: Bree Olson Video]
7/4/11	We attended a workshop at a conference once where the speaker began his talk by saying, “We only walk by continually beginning to fall forward.” While we can’t really speak to the relevance for that specific workshop to what followed in our professional careers, since none of us can even remember which one it was – or even what city we were in when we heard it – we have employed the sentiment on occasion. For example, we can see how the theory applies to the freedoms celebrated in America on July 4^th, even if many of us face $2,000 fines should we seek to create our own Rocket’s Red Glare instead of simply enjoying those of the government-sponsored variety. Perhaps most of all, however, Freedom (with a capital “F” don’t you know) allows us to voice introspection and illustrate our points with beautiful naked women. All in all that does seem safer than potentially blowing off your hand or burning the town down. [FEATURED TAGS: Anais, Shayla LaVeaux, Jassie, Marie Luv, Daisy Marie, Faith Leon, Kimberly Kane, Adriana Sage, Britney Manson, Emily Marilyn, Michael Ninn]
7/1/11	Everybody should pop on over to JuliaAnn.com and say hello. You should also probably join Julia’s site so you can see all the cool stuff. If you decide upon this course of action, however, you should probably be aware that there might be nudity there, and even possibly representations of sex out of wedlock. Then again if moral issues seem to be a stumbling block for you, what the heck are you doing here anyway? … So how’d we do Julia? Subtle enough? [FEATURED TAGS: Julia Ann Video]

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