Filed Under: Juli Ashton

December 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

12/31/11	As near as we can tell, today happens to be New Year’s eve, and most places around the world happen to celebrate the new year with substantially more vigor and glee than they do any of those gift-giving holidays. Of course the vast majority of the world has at least a culture, but often an entire political system, that stems in no small degree from religious persecution, so maybe that makes sense. After all, it seems very wise to focus more on a day of the year you won’t get shot for celebrating, right? For our part, we have decided to stick to our roots as well. What they lack in historic violence and upheaval, they more than make up for in fun and nudity. This doesn’t set the bar very high, we understand, but as a rule we tend to prefer simple goals. (You members may have noticed.) And if D.Minion happens to discover our camouflaged secret, well, we plan on employing the exact same New Year’s Resolution we enjoy every year: Blame Maverick for everything. [FEATURED TAGS: Georgia Adair Video]
12/27/11	People do sometimes contribute to their own “Birthday Party” as Shayla has decided to do so today. True to at least our form, she chose to celebrate “Holliday” over the Holidays, and offers up some insights as to what it’s like being in the middle of 30 or 40 women all having sex together. Sadly, none of us here can really comment on this experience first-hand, but we do have a great many folks willing to learn. We value education, after all. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video, Kylie Ireland Video, Serenity Video, Juli Ashton Video, Nina Hartley Video, Shawna Lenee]
12/25/11	So did you sleep with thoughts of Sugar-Plums dancing through your head? Have you ever done that in your whole life? Would you even know a Sugar-Plum if it jumped out of the closet and bit you? And when is the last time you heard anyone exclaim, “My! What a clatter!” anyway? The fact that people around here spend time pondering such weighty issues serves as the only excuse I can think of for this Merry Christmas … um … Members’ Card. I worry about us sometimes. I really do. [FEATURED TAGS: Merry Christmas!]
12/24/11	You may not find it intuitive, but the adult movie industry happens to display a great deal of holiday cheer among its members. Of course you can’t really have a properly caroling environment without Ebenezer Scrooge, and thus we speak today with sincere affection for our friend Gregory Dark. True, we have chosen to do so with the able assistance of Juli Ashton, Kelly O’Dell, Felecia, and Serenity, but in our defense we claimed to be festive — not foolish. Why listen to some old fat guy that’s not planning on dropping down any chimneys tonight when you fill your silent nights with young ladies clearly coming about midnight? … There are way too many seasonal songs to consider. We’d best stop now. [FEATURED TAGS: Juli Ashton Video, Kelly O’Dell Video, Felecia Video, Serenity Video]
12/21/11	This is the time of year where we all get a little nostalgic; we all feel a little more optimistic, a little more peaceful. Benevolent tendencies, long hidden throughout the year, come closer to the surface, and we allow ourselves to pause a few more times during the day, just to feel a part of Mother Earth. … Or if you happen to be like us, you praise Rednecks everywhere, and wonder why everyone doesn’t celebrate the way we do. You forgive them, however, because let’s face it: If you go around saying everything you really think, no one is ever going to give you a gift — at least not one you’ll want to receive. [FEATURED TAGS: Anais, Georgia Adair, Angel Cassidy, Wanda Curtis, Michael Ninn, Bree Olsen Video, Sunny Leone Video]
12/19/11	We all know ‘Tis the Season of Giving, but let’s be honest, it’s pretty fun to get new things too. And with any luck they won’t be the sorts of things that will live in a closet until next year when we can give them again. In a typically benevolent re-gifting game, then, we have decided to offer up some holiday gift suggestions before we shuttle everyone off to enjoy Cytherea playing fauna amongst the flora. D.Minion “naturally” adds her special touch, although DM can be a lot like a gift from a distant relative: You honestly appreciate it, but you’re just not quite sure how to explain it to anyone. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video]
12/15/11	Rarely do we link directly to 247AdultStars.com — preferring rather to heighten anticipation, sweeten the experience, and generally make it more pleasantly pithy. … It’s either that or we pretty much like any excuse to show off more naked women. Theories may vary. All of this goes by the wayside this season, however, as Dear Maverick, being from London and thus used to a depressing Christmas season until the very last minute, has seen fit to visit a few ghosts on a couple of Brit Porn Stars and convince them to film a special holiday greeting for the members. You know what? … God Bless Us, Every One … [FEATURED TAGS: Anna Joy Exclusive Video, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
12/10/11	Contrary to D.Minion’s contention in the office, after making egg nog, they do not in fact use the rest of the animal to create Naugahyde seat covers. We try to be helpful with our insights here, just so no one gets confused as they go through life. You might consider, then, taking D.Minion’s view of Day Two of Ninn Worx’ House of Jordan shoot with a grain of salt — if not an entire spice rack. None of this detracts, however, from the 241 stellar photographs. … And how do we know these to be stellar photographs? Why all these women are stars, of course. [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Jordan, Alexis Love, Tiffany Sweet, Carli Banks, Michael Ninn]
12/7/11	You know those kind of “entertainment” things where folks get really sort of devious and sneak in little bits and pieces that presumably will teach us something? Sure, they couch it all in some general “Oh, my goodness, but this is a lot of fun!” sort of way, but it always sort of sounds like Tom Sawyer and that fence painting job? … You will be happy to know that for our part we are simply celebrating Chasey Lain’s birthday today, and if anyone learns anything, well, dang that ain’t our fault. How can porno be educational anyway? [FEATURED TAGS: Chasey Lain, Alexis DeVell, Shayla LaVeaux, Kaylan Nicole, Jewel, Emma Nixon]
12/4/11	We’ve heard a horrible rumor that some places out there have to deal with this bizarre phenomenon called “snow” — which basically sounds like a euphemism for “frozen water that can make life hell” if you want to know the truth. Having seen pictures of it on the news, we can tell you: It looks icky. We did want you to know, however, that we do have how own version of Snow out here, though, although admittedly ours happens to be of the “Aurora Snow” variety. … So you know what we call our Northern Lights? … Yep! … Aurora Areolas. (Sorry. We blame the cold — wherever it may be.) [FEATURED TAGS: Aurora Snow, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Phoenix Ray, Jessica Drake]
12/1/11	Anyone can do an interview, but very, very few people can do a “Ninnterview” as you’ll see easily. Also, anyone can crash a wedding, but only Cytherea can do it … well … like Cytherea does. And if these two quick introductions don’t make you want to see what’s on tap for today, then perhaps you should make an appointment with your family physician. You don’t feel well. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Brea Bennett Video, Jana Jordan Video, Renee Perez Video, Cassidey Video, Nikki Kane Video, Jennifer Dark, Alexis Love, Michael Ninn]

April 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

4/30/11	So apparently they had this big wedding yesterday, and insane people over here stayed up until all hours of the morning just to watch it on TV? Well, we can’t say that this makes any sense to us California folks, but then we’ve heard the same thing said about us from other parts of the country. Did you ever embrace a reflective moment and think about just how you ended up where you did in your life? Presumably people in prison do this with some regularity, but fortunately today we’re not talking about weddings or incarceration – either of these sad situations. Today we sit down with Shayla and consider the “Origins of Porn Woman” and be honestly thrilled that the entire world doesn’t watch everything we do. Seriously. That sounds icky, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Alexis DeVell, AEE 2011, Shayla LaVeaux, Julia Ann, Cheyenne Silver, Inari Vachs, Tori Black, Tanya Tate, Phoenix Marie, Bobbi Starr, Andy San Dimas, Jesse Jane, Shy Love, Selena Rose, Natasha Nice, Kayden Kross, Jessica Drake, Riley Steele, Dana DeArmond, Bree Olsen, Prinzzess, Lupe Fuentes, Joanna Angel, Anna Lovato, Jynx Maze, Kristen Rose, Lexi Belle, Breanne Benson, Nina Hartley, Monique Alexander, Stoya, Andy San Dimas, Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
4/28/11	You know what colloquialisms are we assume? OK. So most of us have at least heard the word, and we probably have some vague idea of the meaning, although that may or may not be true. After all, it’s not like you have occasion to throw that particular English language tidbit into a conversation every day. And if you have one thing, like a colloquialism, for example, don’t sound principles of physics dictate that its direct opposite be possible too? So what’s the opposite of a colloquialism? … If you’re confused, you’ve now perfectly prepared yourself to match our condition today, so all you Members can now feel free to enter. On the upside, we do have Renee Perez playing in the shower this time around, and basically that’s not very confusing at all. [FEATURED TAGS: Renee Perez Video, Michael Ninn]
4/22/11	There are many, many ways to say Happy Birthday across the globe, yet all of them mean, “Gosh, you’re even older than you were yesterday.” As our friends get older, we have noticed a tendency to buy them gifts that we hope to get back in inheritance, though, but that’s OK, right? We should be practical after all. Also, we’re going to stop writing now so that El Jefe doesn’t have enough clues to figure out which of us wrote this introduction. Practical … [FEATURED TAGS: Tanya Cox, “The Snatch Game” ]
4/21/11	Just in case you’re ever curious, you should know that the only people that ever win in a lawsuit are the lawyers. Legal fights beat you up financially, emotionally, and depending upon how long they drag on, even spiritually. They’re not fun. Sadly, however, they are sometimes necessary. As we understand it, you’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything. All in all, the only thing you really learn from lawsuits boils down to an addition to your list of people with whom you never want to have to see ever again in your life. Sometimes the lawyers don’t end up being first on that list, but they always make the list for sure. Even for attorneys, though, all good things must come to an end, and eventually even the most acrimonious of disputes reaches some form of resolution. Today would be such a day. … Whew. [FEATURED TAGS: Vicca, Nikita, Juli Ashton, Felecia, Anna Malle, Asia Carrera, Ron Jeremy, Ninn Video, Michael Ninn]
4/18/19	Most of us would agree that only a few things in life can annoy us as much as paying taxes. We all see the need for them in the abstract, and quite honestly see the value in government services and the philanthropic concepts of helping those less fortunate than ourselves. When theory crashes into personal reality, however, you can almost hear a universal whining. If you don’t believe that just listen to the richest 10% of the people in the country bellow and start talking about the President’s citizenship every time he dares suggest they should probably try to contribute a little more to help the country get out of its economic mess – that he didn’t create, by the way, but let’s not get too bogged down in politics. … In that non-political spirit we’re dishing up our own risque brand of tax relief today. We’d be willing to bet that if you love it or hate it, you’re decision will have nothing whatsoever to with your party affiliation. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Lylith LaVey]
4/15/11	Does anyone else wonder why today doesn’t qualify as Tax Day, even though it’s a Friday and not a weekend? Nope. We didn’t either. We just said, “Whoopie! We get extra time this year!” … Of course none of us really need the extra time because we always do our taxes in January so we don’t even have to worry about it anymore. Yep. That’s our story, and we’re stickin’ to it. … You’ll find other words (and pictures) of wisdom in A Dawning today as well. What an excellent Friday. [FEATURED TAGS: Audrey Hollander, Heather Vuur, Heather Vandeven, Jassie, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Michael Ninn]
4/12/11	We would love to say that we spend hours and hours thinking up clever titles for our ever-so-insightful commentary on the risque commune sites, but that wouldn’t technically be true. Generally someone just pops off with something, the others laugh, and that’s what we go with. Sometimes, though, a couple of very good ideas get thrown into the mix, and then we have a debate, granted about the silliest of things. (That’s what Americans do, as any analysis of professional sports or politics will clearly illustrate.) Today we had “Sheen without Luster” as well as “Sheen and Lust Her” as options that we just couldn’t reach consensus on. D.Minion said she’d decide, since it was her story, after all. … Naturally D.Minion picked a third title. … It’s good to be Queen. We’re not so sure about being a Goddess, however. [FEATURED TAGS: Capri Anderson, Bree Olsen Video]
4/6/11	Back before he started making sausage, Jimmy Dean recorded a song with a chorus that began, “I won’t go huntin’ with you, Jake, but I’ll go chasin’ women.” Most of you will probably be glad to hear that this does not happen to be the song in which you can find Shayla naked in the music video. That said, as between early 1950’s country music – Ice T’s “Body Count” – and sausage, we can’t honestly say which we’d like to see made less. Shayla dancing naked is always good, however. [FEATURED TAGS: Justine Joli]
4/3/11	Last night we learned the Butler did it, if UConn believe that. … And if you don’t follow college basketball, or if you happen to be reading this years from now, that will make no sense at all. Fortunately, sexy women do tend toward the timeless and universally understood, so don’t worry yourself too much about the “strangest of the strange” around here. Both Shayla LaVeaux and Cheyenne Silver give reports today on the most recent AEE, and 247AdultStars chimes in with “visitors” Lon and D.Minion as well. All it all it’s very confusing. So go slowly and remember to breathe. Ice cream might help too. … And for all you authors that hurried your reports in because we were going to publish this a couple of days ago … um … April Fool’s. (Hey we couldn’t have used the amazingly clever and hysterical Butler/UConn comment on April 1st. See? Things tend to work out.) [FEATURED TAGS: AEE 2011, Shayla LaVeaux, Cheyenne Silver, Cytherea, Katsuni, Prinzzess, Alektra Blue, Syren, Exclusive Video]

March 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

3/30/11	Today turns out to be a wealth of information. We’ve got visits to porn sets, secret hints regarding major industry players, anal sex insights, bootleg video, puns, alliteration, personal life retrospective on famous porn directors, a new camera … oh, and Bobbi Starr and Cheyenne Silver naked. When you’ve got all that going for you, it would probably be smart to just get to the point. For once, we’ll take our own advice. [FEATURED TAGS: Cheyenne Silver, Bobbi Starr Exclusive Video]
3/27/11	Supposedly we should always associate more importance with the journey rather than the destination. Understanding that, however, when you happen to be travelling to Cytherea’s house, “the journey” has a tough task ahead of itself if it presumes to actually secure its level of preeminent significance. While we can’t honestly say that the Honorable Journey turned out to be “better” than hanging out with Cy, it did completely entertain all the Geeks in the car. Of course we happen to proponents of the theory that basically anything having to do with Cytherea will be a lot of fun. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Sandie Caine Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
3/23/11	As it turned out, today seems a rather odd day to be “Flying Under the Radar” as was our plan. We lost a Hollywood legend this morning, and odd as it seems we’ve often used Elizabeth Taylor as an example to risque clients that there certainly exists a way to be both sexy and classy. (Then we usually follow that comment by noting that you really don’t have to get married eight times just to enjoy sex with different people, but that’s sort of off-topic right now.) We’re sorry she’s gone around here, but she can still serve as a fine example of pure, strong, womanhood for some years to come we expect. Perhaps she even added to her aura in her later years. One thing about Ms. Taylor, she certainly did not go gentle into that good night. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video, Sunny Lane Video, Nicki Hunter Video, Emy Reyes, Megan Foxx Video, Tessa Taylor Video, Sasha Heart Video, Nick Manning Video, Ron Jeremy Video, Erica McLean Video]
3/20/11	Over the years we have admittedly made some fairly dubious “musical” references on this site. This time, however, we’ve stooped to George Michael (if you can forgive us that). Regardless of the quality of the music (or arguably a distinct lack thereof), sometimes a title just fits a risque situation too perfectly to ignore. What can we say? You Gotta Have Faith … [FEATURED TAGS: Faith Leon Video, Daisy Layne, Michael Ninn]
3/17/11	We cherish America’s position in the world as the staunch symbol of Freedom, belief in the rights of every person to speak without fear of reprisal, and the fount of the wellspring of hope that diligent effort, combined with a strong moral compass, can result in a position in life practically unavailable other places on the planet. We relish our Melting Pot status, secure in our confidence that the very diversity of citizenry that many fear could tear apart the very fabric of society in fact bonds us all to a common goal of an improved life in aggregate. And on those occasions such as today, we give humble regard and open reverence, not only for St. Patrick and all he accomplished and still stands for in Irish lore, but also for his position in history as an excuse to create green beer. Suitably for us, it seems then, we warmly offer you Erin Go Braless. … We’re like that. [FEATURED TAGS: Julia Ann, Jana Jordan, Sunny Lane, Karlie Montana, Nevaeh, Angie Savage, Capri Anderson]
3/15/11	Unlike Mr. Ceasar, we have no need to beware the Ides of March. In fact, we sort of go “WHEE!” … as in AngIE, KarlIE, and MarlIE – although Ms. Savage, Ms. Montana, and Ms. Moore don’t happen to spell their names that way. In addition we endeavor mightily (the best way to endeavor, truth be told) to maintain a promised confidence. If you “C” anything otherwise, well, oops. We can’t be blamed, you know: Because “I” and “E” always come before “C” – right? We are all a wratchild at heart. [FEATURED TAGS: Marlie Moore Video, Karlie Montana Video, Angie Savage Video, Micheal Ninn]
3/12/11	Most of you probably haven’t spent much time looking at web traffic statistics, because, let’s face it: Why in the world would you want to do something as horribly geeky as that? Well, some of us around here actually enjoy that sort of thing, and sometimes we’ll notice just the oddest trends. Over the last couple of weeks, for example, we’ve been getting a lot of searches for Heather Vuur. (She was Vandeven. Then she was Vuur. Then she went back to Vandeven again. People and their names in this business … .) Now we wouldn’t consider it “odd” because people are interested in Heather, because that makes perfect sense to us, but considering what we may be able to talk about soon, today’s story of D.Minion’s first foray “Oh, Vuur” the hills to visit with Heather seemed to make a lot of sense, so we decided to sort of throw it in out of order here. You’ll find it much easier to browse through the 150 or so photos of Heather with our new system, and you might begin to give some thought to what we “may” be able to talk about soon. Honestly, that’s a lot more interesting than thinking about web stats. [FEATURED TAGS: Heather Vuur, Heather Vandeven, Michael Ninn]
3/11/11	Nary as mystical a thing exists for a typical male as a “Girls Night Out” – well, except a “Girls Night In” probably. When new risque compatriots Shayla LaVeaux, Cytherea, and Cheyenne Silver bond together one late night in Las Vegas, you can imagine what delicious decadence could transpire. Don’t get overly excited here, though. Nothing like that happened. Actually we didn’t see evidence of any lingerie at all, and not even one pillow fight. We really have to have a talk with these ladies. On the other hand, maybe porn stars are regular people too. They just don’t have the same shy gene as the rest of us. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video, Cytherea, Cheyenne Silver, Juli Ashton Video, Dee Video, Keri Windsor Video]
3/7/11	The Message Board over on the Members’ Side has been going gangbusters, which seems a little counter-intuitive if you think about it, actually. People have been getting quite excited about our upcoming visit to Las Vegas to record the ever-nubile Cytherea this week. Local fans have deluged us with a myriad of suggestions regarding potential locations for the shoot, which, considering it does happen to be Cytherea we’re talking about, seems quite logical in the scheme. Oddly, almost all of those ideas involve having Cytherea “visit” at the homes of the local fans. We figure they must all be very hopeful as regards the growing success of CythereasWetWorld.com. Yeah, that’s gotta be it. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Capri Anderson]
3/5/11	Assuming you’re not consumed with Sirius radio’s 24-hour marathon station they’ve called “Tigerblood” today, you might have time to consider that Estiercol de Caballo Solamente means Horse Manure Only in Spanish. Not that we attempt to editorially equate those two things, of course, but the phrase does come into play with the first day on the set of The Flying Pink Pig, courtesy of D.Minion. Honestly, she has an actual photo included – of the phrase, not the organic substance. Long-time members will recall what being on set with D.Minion can mean, and we’ll warn you that she had Shayla LaVeaux, Sunny Lane, Nicki Hunter, and Erica McLean to play with on this day, not to mention a menagerie of dogs and horses. You’ll need a nice frosty beverage to make it through this one. Come to think of it, you’ll probably need two. Maybe three. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Sunny Lane Exclusive Video, Nicki Hunter, Nick Manning Exclusive Video, Erica McLean]
3/1/11	Historically, even those of us without “Tiger Blood and Adonis DNA” seem to have managed our lives just fine. (That’s a reference to the chaos that has become Charlie Sheen which – hopefully – will have dropped from public consciousness at some point, so we thought we’d explain it.) Very smart people, in fact, have learned that spending quality time with the Risqué Commune can bring a little happiness to our lives, regardless of the state of our hemoglobin neighborhood. And while you enjoy the latest playtime from our own resident “Rock Stars from Mars” Shayla LaVeaux and Cytherea, you can take solace in a core ambition in life: If you can’t be a good example, at least try to be a horrible warning. Live a little. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Juli Ashton, Keri Windsor, Dee, Cytherea Exclusive Video]

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