Filed Under: Lupe Fuentes

April 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

4/30/11	So apparently they had this big wedding yesterday, and insane people over here stayed up until all hours of the morning just to watch it on TV? Well, we can’t say that this makes any sense to us California folks, but then we’ve heard the same thing said about us from other parts of the country. Did you ever embrace a reflective moment and think about just how you ended up where you did in your life? Presumably people in prison do this with some regularity, but fortunately today we’re not talking about weddings or incarceration – either of these sad situations. Today we sit down with Shayla and consider the “Origins of Porn Woman” and be honestly thrilled that the entire world doesn’t watch everything we do. Seriously. That sounds icky, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Alexis DeVell, AEE 2011, Shayla LaVeaux, Julia Ann, Cheyenne Silver, Inari Vachs, Tori Black, Tanya Tate, Phoenix Marie, Bobbi Starr, Andy San Dimas, Jesse Jane, Shy Love, Selena Rose, Natasha Nice, Kayden Kross, Jessica Drake, Riley Steele, Dana DeArmond, Bree Olsen, Prinzzess, Lupe Fuentes, Joanna Angel, Anna Lovato, Jynx Maze, Kristen Rose, Lexi Belle, Breanne Benson, Nina Hartley, Monique Alexander, Stoya, Andy San Dimas, Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
4/28/11	You know what colloquialisms are we assume? OK. So most of us have at least heard the word, and we probably have some vague idea of the meaning, although that may or may not be true. After all, it’s not like you have occasion to throw that particular English language tidbit into a conversation every day. And if you have one thing, like a colloquialism, for example, don’t sound principles of physics dictate that its direct opposite be possible too? So what’s the opposite of a colloquialism? … If you’re confused, you’ve now perfectly prepared yourself to match our condition today, so all you Members can now feel free to enter. On the upside, we do have Renee Perez playing in the shower this time around, and basically that’s not very confusing at all. [FEATURED TAGS: Renee Perez Video, Michael Ninn]
4/22/11	There are many, many ways to say Happy Birthday across the globe, yet all of them mean, “Gosh, you’re even older than you were yesterday.” As our friends get older, we have noticed a tendency to buy them gifts that we hope to get back in inheritance, though, but that’s OK, right? We should be practical after all. Also, we’re going to stop writing now so that El Jefe doesn’t have enough clues to figure out which of us wrote this introduction. Practical … [FEATURED TAGS: Tanya Cox, “The Snatch Game” ]
4/21/11	Just in case you’re ever curious, you should know that the only people that ever win in a lawsuit are the lawyers. Legal fights beat you up financially, emotionally, and depending upon how long they drag on, even spiritually. They’re not fun. Sadly, however, they are sometimes necessary. As we understand it, you’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything. All in all, the only thing you really learn from lawsuits boils down to an addition to your list of people with whom you never want to have to see ever again in your life. Sometimes the lawyers don’t end up being first on that list, but they always make the list for sure. Even for attorneys, though, all good things must come to an end, and eventually even the most acrimonious of disputes reaches some form of resolution. Today would be such a day. … Whew. [FEATURED TAGS: Vicca, Nikita, Juli Ashton, Felecia, Anna Malle, Asia Carrera, Ron Jeremy, Ninn Video, Michael Ninn]
4/18/19	Most of us would agree that only a few things in life can annoy us as much as paying taxes. We all see the need for them in the abstract, and quite honestly see the value in government services and the philanthropic concepts of helping those less fortunate than ourselves. When theory crashes into personal reality, however, you can almost hear a universal whining. If you don’t believe that just listen to the richest 10% of the people in the country bellow and start talking about the President’s citizenship every time he dares suggest they should probably try to contribute a little more to help the country get out of its economic mess – that he didn’t create, by the way, but let’s not get too bogged down in politics. … In that non-political spirit we’re dishing up our own risque brand of tax relief today. We’d be willing to bet that if you love it or hate it, you’re decision will have nothing whatsoever to with your party affiliation. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Lylith LaVey]
4/15/11	Does anyone else wonder why today doesn’t qualify as Tax Day, even though it’s a Friday and not a weekend? Nope. We didn’t either. We just said, “Whoopie! We get extra time this year!” … Of course none of us really need the extra time because we always do our taxes in January so we don’t even have to worry about it anymore. Yep. That’s our story, and we’re stickin’ to it. … You’ll find other words (and pictures) of wisdom in A Dawning today as well. What an excellent Friday. [FEATURED TAGS: Audrey Hollander, Heather Vuur, Heather Vandeven, Jassie, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Michael Ninn]
4/12/11	We would love to say that we spend hours and hours thinking up clever titles for our ever-so-insightful commentary on the risque commune sites, but that wouldn’t technically be true. Generally someone just pops off with something, the others laugh, and that’s what we go with. Sometimes, though, a couple of very good ideas get thrown into the mix, and then we have a debate, granted about the silliest of things. (That’s what Americans do, as any analysis of professional sports or politics will clearly illustrate.) Today we had “Sheen without Luster” as well as “Sheen and Lust Her” as options that we just couldn’t reach consensus on. D.Minion said she’d decide, since it was her story, after all. … Naturally D.Minion picked a third title. … It’s good to be Queen. We’re not so sure about being a Goddess, however. [FEATURED TAGS: Capri Anderson, Bree Olsen Video]
4/6/11	Back before he started making sausage, Jimmy Dean recorded a song with a chorus that began, “I won’t go huntin’ with you, Jake, but I’ll go chasin’ women.” Most of you will probably be glad to hear that this does not happen to be the song in which you can find Shayla naked in the music video. That said, as between early 1950’s country music – Ice T’s “Body Count” – and sausage, we can’t honestly say which we’d like to see made less. Shayla dancing naked is always good, however. [FEATURED TAGS: Justine Joli]
4/3/11	Last night we learned the Butler did it, if UConn believe that. … And if you don’t follow college basketball, or if you happen to be reading this years from now, that will make no sense at all. Fortunately, sexy women do tend toward the timeless and universally understood, so don’t worry yourself too much about the “strangest of the strange” around here. Both Shayla LaVeaux and Cheyenne Silver give reports today on the most recent AEE, and 247AdultStars chimes in with “visitors” Lon and D.Minion as well. All it all it’s very confusing. So go slowly and remember to breathe. Ice cream might help too. … And for all you authors that hurried your reports in because we were going to publish this a couple of days ago … um … April Fool’s. (Hey we couldn’t have used the amazingly clever and hysterical Butler/UConn comment on April 1st. See? Things tend to work out.) [FEATURED TAGS: AEE 2011, Shayla LaVeaux, Cheyenne Silver, Cytherea, Katsuni, Prinzzess, Alektra Blue, Syren, Exclusive Video]

February 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

2/27/11	Of course we could have just let everyone know that Maverick has his new post up on 247AdultStars.com but then we would have missed out to talk about Cheyenne Silver some more. With all the various negotiations going on around the country, not all of them as newsworthy as the NFL CBA probably, we’ve been refreshing our memories on the classic strategy recommended for “The Prisoner’s Dilemma” around here. Theoretically we should have some news to finally relate in the coming month, but for now you can See How Silver Shines and try not to feel too sorry about when millionaires have to fight with billionaires. For our part, we’ll continue to hope that we won’t have to bone up on Sun Tzu and Machiavelli. [FEATURED TAGS:AEE 2011, Cheyenne Silver, Faye Reagan, Gianna Michaels, Gina Lynn, Bree Olsen, Tanya Tate, Kaylani Lei, Lupe Fuentes, Jessica Drake, Bobbi Starr, Lexi Belle, Nina Hartley, Inari Vachs, Tara Lynn Foxx, Tori Black, Riley Steele, Jesse Jane,Asa Akira, JustineJoli, MoniqueAlexander, Adrenalynn, Alexis Ford, Kayden Kross,Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
2/24/11	New words enter the English language all the time. We all now use “tweet” in a way entirely different from its traditional associations, for example. Some words appear entirely out of nowhere. You’d be hard pressed to find a person on the planet now that doesn’t know “Google” as both a noun and a verb now. Heck, they even had a big televised “event” when the Oxford American College Dictionary added Rachel Ray’s “EVOO” (Extra-Virgin Olive Oil) to its listings a couple of years ago. Still, with all of that it would be a mistake to ignore some rarely used, yet nevertheless classic, words when they fit a situation. Take for example Matriarch. And then apply it to Shayla LaVeaux. That’s what we do today at least. … And after you’re done enjoying the story (and probably the lesbian videos featuring Shayla, Juli Ashton, Keri Windsor, and Dee) then you can think about what “Extra-Virgin” might mean in our context. That seems to be a tricky one. [FEATURED TAGS:Cheyenne Silver, Shayla LaVeaux Video,Jessica Drake, Rayveness, Skye Blue, Juli Ashton Video, Keri Windsor Video, Dee Video]
2/21/11	All of us recognize Los Angeles as pretty much the Land of Celebrities, but that fact can still be rather surprising on occasion. For example, we’re not sure exactly which celebrities we might have expected to see sitting courtside at the NBA All-Star Game yesterday, but honestly Stevie Wonder would have been really far down the list of potentials. Of course he did have a guy next to him that seemed to be providing a personal play by play. Still, it does seem an odd choice, even for a rich guy. Now should he have wanted to sit courtside while Cytherea masturbates in a stairwell, that would have made perfect sense to us. Life’s just a matter of perspective, isn’t it? [FEATURED TAGS:Cytherea]
2/19/11	Have you ever driven through a particularly bad thunderstorm and had it break a brand new windshield? Well, if you haven’t we can assure you that it makes for a rather disconcerting conclusion of a journey. Sometimes you just have to deal with unpleasantness in life. Of course, when you work in the adult movie business, terms like “uncomfortable” can take on a dynamically different meaning as today’s example with Sasha Heart should demonstrate. On the other hand, the experience did provide us with a handy title for the episode: Oh, Hail No! … If you can’t make lemonade out of life’s little quirks, at least try to smile through the refraction. [FEATURED TAGS:Ron Jeremy, Sasha Heart, Video, Erica McLean]
2/17/11	Remember how happy you were when you finally reached the light at the end of the tunnel and it did not in fact turn out to be a train? Well our conclusion of the Dee at KSEX Saga falls into that category, since now we can move along to if not more interesting, at least different, episodes in the Life of Dee. Also, it happens to be her birthday today, and this seemed like a wonderful way to celebrate it. After all we want to keep Dee happy since we might want to get on another ride with her soon. Face it: Not all tunnels are created equal. [FEATURED TAGS:KSEX Radio, Dee Video, Juli Ashton Video]
2/14/11	Our not yet venerable, but certainly less than spry D.Minion weighs in on love this time around, and predictably you’ll need to wade through a bit of the “aren’t puppies wonderful” prose. On the upside, those parts remain amazingly easy to skip. We also get a little insight into porn star love courtesy, Juli Ashton, Julia Ann, Devinn Lane, and one quite fortunate fellow, and that beats the heck out of Puppy Love, truth be told. Finally we should wish 247AdultStars.com an official Happy Birthday today, which sort of wraps the whole love and happiness bit up into a nice adorable package. Of course “nice, adorable, package” isn’t ever what a guy really wants to hear from any woman, let alone one he loves. However, if she has beautiful porn star friends, we’re willing to forgive a lot. Men are so easy. [FEATURED TAGS:Julia Ann Exclusive Video, Melissa Monet, Devinn Lane, Juli Ashton]
2/10/11	Think about how much nicer it would be if it were really warm where you are. And then think about Shayla and three of her naked female friends joining you to cool off (or heat up, whatever). … And then think about Jeannie C. Riley. … Yeah, it confused us too. But the tropical lesbian fest makes sense, and it’s easy enough to ignore all the silly prose from the aging ones around here. In the spirit of things today, however, we did decide to offer up a thumbnail link that has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with D.Minion’s topic of the day – but it fits the Shayla one perfectly. Of course clearly it’s easy to get along with Shayla. [FEATURED TAGS:Shayla LaVeaux, Felecia, Selena Steele, Janie]
2/6/11	You know what’s really cool about membership areas (well, at least when you have access to them)? You can look at these little bitty, admittedly quite confusing thumbnail images and at least hope they’ll be some explanation for them inside. While the NFL estimates somewhere over 150,000,000 will be watching the Super Bowl today, we don’t anticipate being quite that crowded. On the other hand, they just have a bunch of sweaty men, and we have a sweaty Cytherea. We win. … We also have perhaps the very best video ever taken of “Life at a Convention” – admittedly enhanced with some very festive polka music. Gosh, we win again. [FEATURED TAGS:Dee, Cytherea Exclusive Video, Jessica Drake Exclusive Video]
2/1/11	Apparently over 100 million people find themselves bracing for a brutal winter storm today. And not one of them works in the office here in Southern California. Imagine that. Almost all of us have families elsewhere that generally refer to our place of domicile with some variation of the “Land of Fruits and Nuts” comment, though. (And they don’t mean anything at all having to do with healthy food items, in case you couldn’t tell.) Still, the whole “cultural” issue came to mind, and seemed like a fine launching point for today. If nothing else, our “Jean Pool” approach will distract you from shoveling snow. People still do that we hear. … Odd. [FEATURED TAGS:Shayla LaVeaux Video, Juli Ashton, Keri Windsor, Gary Gray (Helmetcam Man)]