Filed Under: Wendy Divine

October 2013 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

10/31/13

One of our telecommuting team members apparently has a tradition in his neighborhood where when the kids say “Trick or Treat” they get candy — while the adults get a shot of some sort, and not the kind that protects you from the flu. Now none of us has ever been to that particular neighborhood, but the kids probably run from house to house because it won’t be too long before mom and dad need to head home because they’re too drunk to walk much more. You’ll have to provide your own shots this evening but we have provided some dandy treats with Cytherea, Kylie Ireland, Syren Sexton, and even Summer Knight. There’s a story in there somewhere, and we will likely tell it. [STAR TAGS: Cytherea, Kylie Ireland Video, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, Summer Knight Video, Bonnie Rotten, 247AdultStars.com ]

Nice Costume, but She Might Get Chilly
10/26/13

It seems like referencing Harold Hill in an adult web site might be a bit unusual, yet we happily do just that this time around. As you may know, however, we have not historically been all that concerned with “usual” in any of our approaches to life. On the other hand, we also pay tribute to a $1,500 sex toy, which falls closer to the adult members’ site norm. Of course we did title the current article, “Oh, We Got Treble.” So there’s that. To quote our leader in today’s post, “We’re just weird.” [STAR TAGS: Jeska Vardinski Video, Asa Akira Video]

A Clef Highlighting a Cleft
10/22/13

Never one to worry much about her own wardrobe, we were a bit surprised when D.Minion showed up in the office insisting that everyone check out her new shirt. It says, “I have CDO, which is like OCD but in alphabetical order — as it should be.” … Suddenly everything made more sense, a bit like when you discover that a professional model might often make a darned good photographer. We use Dee as an example of this last theory, because overall she might hold more universal interest than D.Minion, even with the funny shirt. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers, Dee Video, Michelle Lay Video]

Dee Peeks at Kristal Summers
10/17/13

Consider the concept of the Practical Homonym, these being words that may not technically “sound the same” but given the actualities of our speech patterns do in fact come across as identical to the ear. For example, Bijou spearheaded a track today which ended up being entitled “Minstrel Machinations,” but when she tried to explain the idea to the rest of us, we heard “Menstrual Machinations.” … Those seem different, really. … Fortunately we’re going with the former of those two concepts, so fear not. And if you think we made up the concept of the practical homonym, we can prove that we did not. Think about it: Country Music would not exist without it. So there. [STAR TAGS: Dee Exclusive Video, Kristal Summers Video, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Wendy Divine, Kylie Ireland Video] 

Merry Risque Minstrels
10/13/13

Name a famous anthropologist. OK. Now name one that never had anything to do with primates. Better yet, name a famous “-ologist” of any kind, not including the fictional ones on television or in books. Fortunately, around here we can illustrate our “-ologies” with all sorts of interesting things, for example Keri Windsor, or even the still happily married Wendy Divine and Eric Masterson. In fact, you can happily pretend you have never learned anything as a member here. Should that turn out to be true, however, and you at some point meet any of us in person, please lie about it. We’re fine with that, so long as you have fun. [STAR TAGS: Wendy Divine, Keri Windsor Video]

Keri Windsor … with a Secret
10/11/13

Everyone needs a friend they can go to with the really tough questions. And this friend should be available for most any emergency, at most any time. Well, not all of us can claim Dee fits into that category for them, but we can happily do so. She does seem a little confused when we call to ask her what kind of yellow mustard to buy or something — as if we’d call just to hear her voice or anything — but as long as she picks up the phone she sounds as adorable as ever. It has been going to voice mail a lot lately, though, so hopefully we won’t have anything other than condiment emergencies for a while. We should probably stop beginning every conversation with, “What are you wearing?” … [STAR TAGS: Dee, Cytherea]

Cytherea Without a Condiment Emergency
10/8/13

When Kristal Summers asks you do do something, you pretty much just agree quickly. When Kristal Summers asks you to do something that involves her being naked, well, you jump right to the task of helping the Selfie Supreme Diva. AND, when Kristal Summers asks you to do something that involves you getting naked with her … well, we honestly have no idea what happens then, because so far Kristal has been lacking in that department, truth be told. Hope springs eternal in Kristal’s breasts, though. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers, Chasey Lain, Anna Joy Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]

 

Kristal Summers on Herself
10/5/13

Today could have been all about our leader’s brother. Or it could have been all about our editor’s best friend from college, since both of them have birthdays today. On the other hand, Juli Ashton also has a birthday today, and without any empirical evidence to verify the claim, we’re pretty sure Juli looks better naked than either of those two fine gentlemen we mentioned. Even the illustrious Ms. Ashton had a beginning it appears, and D.Minion takes the opportunity to talk about it. Truth be told, D.Minion does not need much of an excuse to talk about Juli; when she has a real reason, it can get crazy. [STAR TAGS: Juli Ashton Video]

Juli Ashton
10/1/13

What do you call words that rhyme, but don’t look like they would? Take ”plaid” and “fad” for example. … Or what do you call words that could rhyme, but may not, depending upon how you pronounce one of them? You know, “lead” could rhyme with “fed” or we could “lead” you to Lake Meade. Fortunately your knowledge of semantic nuance makes absolutely no difference at all today, as you can consider plaid a fad, or not consider it at all. We do have various concurrent contributions from Cytherea, Shayla LaVeaux, Kylie Ireland, Summer Knight, Angela Stone, and a couple of amateur lesbians from Canberra to help as tour guides, by the way. Follow where they lead. Or lead others to where they lead. Or fed. Or whatever. [STAR TAGS: Cytherea, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Kylie Ireland Video, Summer Knight Video, Angela Stone Video, Sarah Blake, Thereza Love, Dani Woodward]

Sarah Blake, Not Wearing Plaid

April 2013 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

4/29/13 How many adult web sites can you think of that spend any time at all talking about the weather? Well, this one does, but in all honesty we have historically shunned any attempts to find out if people ever question our sanity. Seriously, what good can ever come of a question like that? At best you learn what you already know, and at worst … well, let’s just get on with our weather forecast with Keri Windsor, shall we? … Beats the heck out of some graphical map with a bunch of “Ls” and “Hs” all over it. [STAR TAGS: Kylie Ireland Video, Keri Windsor Video]
Good Forecast
4/25/13 Apparently the NFL Draft begins tonight, with all sort of people simply thrilled beyond belief that they will have something new to talk about in a sport that will not even see competitive action for another five months or so. Of course these same people have been spending time listening to a radio station where people call in and ask what might hypothetically happen if any number of a lengthy string of variables turn out in one precise way. So there’s that. … All in all, the whole Ménage à Trois competition seems easier to understand, so we mainly consider that instead. [STAR TAGS: Meghan Sweet, Hanna Reilly, Jenna Jameson Video, Eva Tiffany Video]
football
4/21/13 April 22nd — a fine day in many regards — also happens to celebrate Earth Day once again, so we should be fruitful and multiply, or multiply some fruit trees, or conifers or something. You should probably not try to be overly fruitful with conifers in private, however, as that sounds like it might hurt. In our Risqué Business efforts to contribute to a Green Earth, we have thoughtfully provided some soothing activities for afterwards courtesy of Shayla LaVeaux and Wendy Divine, actually. Heck, you probably won’t even have time to look up the word deciduous. [STAR TAGS: Wendy Divine, Maya Divine, Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video]
Divine Relaxation Methods
4/20/13 Helen Keller said, “The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched – they must be felt with the heart.’ … With all due respect to the wonderful contributions to the world made by Ms. Keller, it still seems like it might be better to be able to see TJ Hart and Randy Spears today. Seriously, “heartfelt” takes on a whole new dimension. In the vein (speaking of hearts, and all), we would like to publicly thank Kylie Ireland for her ever-unique contributions to our little group. Also, we would like to apologize for our pundit influence on her team. … Um … Oops. [STAR TAGS: TJ Hart Video]
Shot through the hear, and we're to blame.
4/15/13 It would seem appropriate on this particular date in America to offer up some decidedly non-taxable benefits for our members. We even go so far as to tip our hats to the Living Art of Cytherea — happily without needing to declare those tips, per se. We fully intended to work the U.K. taxation system into this introduction as well until we realized that even as a group we understand their methodology even less than we understand our own. We did come up with a question, however: If you decide to masturbate in the “Loo,” does that make you Looney? [STAR TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, Shayla LaVeaux, 247AdultStars.com]
Shayla LaVeaux
4/9/13 Protracted political observations highlight our insights today, certainly destined to keep you awake at night trying to reconcile centuries-old principles with policy for a modern and progressive America. Or you might prefer to look at the fun photos Kristal Summers sends in from her cell phone, or even watch Kristal and Shayla in nude preparation for — well, predictable — future interaction. We of course think you should spend valuable time thinking about contemporary political issues, but have provided handy-dandy icons to skip over those wordy parts — just in case. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Kristal Summers Exclusive Video]
Kristal Showing Both Sides.
4/6/13 We had a deeply thought-provoking and erudite (at least in a music history sense) introduction ready today, involving legends Tina Turner and Rod Stewart pairing for a grand display. Then someone (We will not mention who, but it rhymes with C.Minion) pointed out that Donny and Marie also sang It Takes Two. Basically that killed the whole idea. One can in fact know too much music history as it turns out. You will have to fill in your own intro for “What’s in Two Names?” Sorry about that. [STAR TAGS: Madison Chandler, Jeanie Marie Sullivan Video]
Lee Stone and Jeanie Marie
4/1/13 Somewhere along the line we all learned that “fools rush in where brave men fear to tread.” Of course none of us really “tread” all that much anymore, preferring to mosey, chill, blend, or some other term you have to be freshly out of your teens to even know. Those with skills born of long experience among us may even saunter, but nobody treads. Of course by the time you may be reading this, we have no idea what the current expression for “hanging out” will be, but you should be doing that as you read some righteous news today. Groovy. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Sunny Leone, Julie Cash, Kylie Ireland Video, Julia Ann Video, Michael Ninn]
Strong Useful Friends

December 2012 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

12/31/12

Who knew that by watching a highly anticipated (well, by some) football game you could be inundated with advertisements for a new television show on AMC featuring “Competitive Taxidermy” of all things? Who knew that taxidermy could be competitive? … Who knew they even still did taxidermy? We have some other thoughts on year’s end today, none of which feature dead animals, just in case you were curious. [FEATURED TAGS: Happy New Year!]

Things to Ponder
12/29/12

You may not have noticed, but if you put all the College Bowl Games together, you could have a heck of a party. You could wear Russel Athletics or New Era Pinstripes, if you knew what those were, maybe. You’d have Tostitos, Buffalo Wings, Idaho Potatoes, Chick-fil-A, Little Caesars Pizza, and even Beef ‘O’ Brady and Outback to eat. You could decorate the place with roses, sip orange juice while you get some sugar from your sweetie, and even stuff cotton in your ears if she started complaining that you were not fighting her hunger with Kraft sufficiently. You’d have wonderful things to talk about like insurance, or car care, wireless services, or taxes, mortgages, or Korean cars. You could even discuss what the heck scantily-clad women and beautiful race car drivers have to do with web domain registration. Best of all, you’d have a Bell Helicopter to escape if some folks started remembering the Alamo a bit too enthusiastically. … Fortunately, none of that had anything to do with even more Shayla today. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video]

Shayla — Does Not Care About College Bowl Games.
12/27/12

Shayla has a special day today well worthy of celebrating. Also in our occasionally not completely behind efforts to bring the really old pages up to modern standards, we will run across some original photos now and again. We weren’t horribly disorganized back in those days, but if someone had told us the sites would last this long, we would have done things differently. … It’s sort of like that old saying, “You know, if I’d have known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.” … Except we still get Shayla naked. That helps a lot with most things. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Alexandra Silk, Missy]

Ride 'Em Cowgirl
12/25/12

We wish you a Merry Christmas. And if you do not happen to celebrate Christmas, well we wish you a merry day of the miscellaneous variety. We’re friendly that way. [FEATURED TAGS: Kylie Ireland]

Ho Ho
12/24/12

Too often in life we lose old friends, whether that be to any of the Big Three options — Sex, Love, Money — or not. Of course “losing” implies a lot of stuff way too deep for discussion here, and sometimes you just want to dance around in a circle like some Charles M. Schultz character not yet burdened by anything really icky — like three dimensions. Say, for example, if you “lose old friends” but then they come back, were they really lost — or simply slapping you upside the face with preternatural insight? … Yeah. We don’t care either. … Basically Kylie makes everything better in our experience. Anything else, well that’s too deep for our pond. [FEATURED TAGS: Kylie Ireland, Anais Video]

What Ho! … Ho-Ho! …
12/21/12

We could hardly deny that we have been guilty of perpetrating some fairly tortured logic in our quests to tie miscellaneous bits of our lives together so that we might present it for your viewing pleasure. Of course all of this pales in comparison with trying to explicate poetry from 1788. Fortunately, you can easily enjoy Cytherea — in cam show and still form — as well as Kelly Kline, without any iambic pentameter at all. They are women without meter, after all. [FEATURED TAGS: Kelly Kline, Cytherea Exclusive Video]

Cytherea Lives! Woo-HOO!
12/18/12

We learned on some crime show the other night that a pig’s orgasm can last up to 30 minutes. Now we’re on enough weird Google Search lists somebody keeps compiled somewhere, so we chose not to really pursue the statement any further, but we did realize that if true this sort of adds a whole new dimension to the expression, “In a pig’s eye,” does it not? … Hey, you spend a few hours watching Dee do a DP and a fine Brit offer up Holiday greetings, and see how your brain feels. [FEATURED TAGS: Dee Video, Juli Ashton, May, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com, Michael Ninn]

Juli Ashton, Dee, & May
12/17/12

You have to be careful how much you really think about things, because you can wind up somewhere no one actually intended. Of course we have found that beer does a dandy job in relieving a befuddled state — or at least it seems to — but if you have to drive somewhere, consider ice cream in its place. Whatever the case, you may find simply looking at (or watching) Shayla LaVeaux, as well as Wendy Divine, might be the best approach this time around. Either that or you might need a lot of ice cream. [FEATURED TAGS: Wendy Divine, Maya Divine, Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Capri Anderson Exclusive Video]

Wendy
12/12/12

Naturally we had to do an update at 12:12 on 12/12/12 because otherwise D.Minion would be very sad. Worse yet, then we couldn’t make it up to her for 100 years, by which point she’d be not only officially peeved, but also really, really old. Fortunately Mr. Ninn and Cytherea happen by to help us reach our desired goal, even if the precise timing might be a bit difficult to prove in court or anything. If it’s always 5:00 somewhere, then it stands to reason that it’s always 12:12 somewhere too, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Jordan Video, Cassidey Video, Renee Perez Video, Brea Bennett Video, Nikki Kane Video, Shayla LaVeaux, Vicca, Shayla LaVeaux, Ashley Renee, Paisley Hunter, Payton Alexander, Ruby, Kortknee, Emanuelle, Jill Kelly, Michael Ninn]

Bride of Ninnenstein
12/10/12

In case any of you were thinking about moving into the middle of nowhere to be with Steve, he has some excellent news for you. Although the temperature outside when he woke up yesterday morning had only reached nine degrees, by mid day the thermometer had skyrocketed to a balmy ten on the Fahrenheit scale. … OR you could plan on meeting Kristal in Florida next time she visits. All in all, that might be warmer. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers Video]

Nice Weather for Skimply Clothing
12/7/12

Most of you have probably barely been able to contain your excitement at the prospect of catching even a glimpse of Cytherea’s personal valet, MrT, in some photographs. Well, we can happily tell you that your wait is finally over! Woo-HOO! … Now we did have to surround those two or three important photos with a bunch more of Cytherea shaving and getting tattoos applied to make her scars less distracting on video, of course. But you can just ignore all those annoying porn star images and enjoy MrT — at least his hands and the back of his head. In case you were curious, Cy does always use waterproof temporary tattoos. Turns out that’s a good thing. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Video, Cate Harrington Exclusive Video, Natalia Forrest Exclusive Video, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]

Butterfles are Whee!
12/4/12

You probably noticed that we have all now officially reached the season where we can start thinking about the cool presents we want other people to give us for free again. True, retailers seem to be making “this time of year” fall earlier and earlier on the calendar, but once we hit December it seems fair for all of us to acknowledge it in general. Even if next year they start advertising Christmas right after the 4th of July, we will still look forward to the holiday offerings from Sam Phillips, actually. She has a unique way, that Sam. [FEATURED TAGS: Sam Phillips, Tasha Reign, Breanne Benson, Sophia Knight]

Not Sam Phillips
12/2/12

Lamentations abound today regarding the rapid demise of Flash becoming more and more apparent. Less bothersome to our leadership at least will be the reference to the public disintegration of a heretofore quite pompous organization in the National Football League. On the off chance that neither of these two topics hold any interest for you, we sneak in an announcement that might, and if that doesn’t work we have over 30 minutes of video that might give you a pleasant “mind space” in which to ruminate — or whatever. [FEATURED TAGS: Dee Video, Kylie Ireland, Cytherea Video, Michael Ninn]

Kylie, Dee, and Steve

February 2012 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

1/30/12

Years ago now, our dear friend SteveH decided to move back to his home town of Bumfuck, Missouri to chase some woman — although we cannot swear to this being the exact name of the town, honestly. Still, it did give us a chance to finally stop using “SteveD” to indicate the Other Steve in the office, as we progressed quickly through “Just Steve” to simply “Steve” when we refered to him. … And then the Original Steve decided to come out and visit us for the show this year, creating the Steve Confusion all over again. On the other hand, it did give all of us the chance to talk about “that woman” whom Original Steve eventually caught out in Missouri. Then we got to oft repeat one of our favorite adages: “Be careful what you wish for … .” What are friends for, after all? As for the New Steve, who became Just Steve after the Old, Original Steve left, well, his timing continued to be less than he might have hoped as you shall see. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video]

Not the Best Plan to Get Laid
1/26/11

We recently learned from The Big Bang that you call a person that studies flags a vexillologist. This of course would not be the same “Big Bang Theory” that arrived to all of us courtesy of Georges Lemaître, but all in all the television series is a whole lot funnier. We can see how Fundamentalist Christians might be offended by both, however. Of course neither of these things have anything whatsoever to do with Becca, or Kristal Summers, or Kira, or Wendy … but we did want to mention them, because honestly how often do you see an adult web site admitting they understand anything at all about Fundamentalist Christians? [FEATURED TAGS: Juli Ashton Video, Kristal Summers Video, Wendy Divine Video, Becca Video, Cytherea, Kira Reed]

Fun at the Office
1/16/12

Some people would argue that a “business” should not even exist that essentially bases its success on naked people. Apparently when these folks left the Garden of Eden they quickly bid it, “Good Riddance!” and took off with a whole tree’s worth of fig leaves for themselves. Of course some people also believe that if “their team” fumbled the ball at an inopportune time over the weekend, the world might indeed end — or at least be no better than a really depressing place for a few months. … You just can’t please some people. What can you do? … Well in our case, on the eve of our annual trek to the AEE in Vegas, we decided this year to take a moment to reflect upon the upstart in the industry, this of course being XBIZ. At first glance, the new approach seems quite a bit different from the older one, but then AVN has an entirely new plan this year as well, so we will see. If nothing else, we have learned to laugh — an important lesson in life.  [FEATURED TAGS: XBIZ LA Convention, Brittney Skye Video]

Ice Cream with Sprinkles. Seriously.
1/15/12

Unless you happen to be a fan of one of the four teams that will remain in the championship race in the NFL after today, you might find a common thought running through your brain incessantly: What to do? What to do? … Of course a very slim chance exists that you happen to be one of those people that does not follow professional football, but worry not about that: We still have that Fifth Amendment thing, and no one can make you admit that. More significant this time around would be Tenaya’s contributions to our traditionally “uncommon thoughts” on life in the XXX Business. Now “valuable” one could argue, but “uncommon” seems self-evident. Tenaya, and Shayla, and Capri? Obviously, they would all be both. [FEATURED TAGS: Tenaya, Misty Rivers, Capri Anderson Video, Shayla LaVeaux, Bianca Video, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]

We Be Team Tenaya
1/11/12

One of the best things about attending the annual AVN convention in Las Vegas has to be that you get a chance to see a lot of friends in the business that you may not have run across on set in a few months. Given that this year’s event has all the indications of being a massive … well, we won’t say because we happen to like the AVN people a lot — but think “massive amounts of copulation in a tightly bunched group” — we plan on having a lot to talk about with them as we all sit around waiting for the organization to catch up with us. All in all, we’re going to have a good time regardless, and honestly the regular conversations with Jenna Haze always rank highly on our good memories list. Speaking of Jenna and good memories, we have a few with D.Minion — and surprisingly few dogs, truth be told. [FEATURED TAGS: Jenna Haze Exclusive Video, Kortney Kane Exclusive Video] 

Jenna Haze – In a bit of a “Haze” – actually.
1/7/12

Travel looms. Technically, loads and loads of travel looms. … What with XBIZ being on the schedule for the first time this year, and AVN deciding that they don’t need all those pesky CES attendees to fill up its convention halls, we will find ourselves living out of suitcases more often than not over the next couple of weeks. Naturally that got us to thinking about earlier times when this has come to pass in our world, and you know what? Come to find out, sometimes it really isn’t all that bad. Porn stars tend to be entertaining travel-mates as it turns out, even if there will likely be not near as much mating as one might hope. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Dee, Inari Vachs, Devinn Lane]  

Dee. A Most Excellent Roommate.
1/3/12

If you rap about a wrap party, is that redundant? What if they play rap music? Worse yet, what if the party involves absolutely no nudity, even though Julia Ann and Inari Vachs are there and so you “rip” it? Well, a wrap party by definition marks the end of something, and in that case R.I.P. would be perfectly in order, right, even if you happen not to be disappointed at all? Who knew what chaos could spring from words with just three little letters? … Hey, you should see what we can do with Cytherea and some of those $10 words. We have been waiting literally years and years for the perfect opportunity to roll out supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. “Fantastic” huh? [FEATURED TAGS: Julia Ann, Inari Vachs, Cytherea]

Dog, Julia, & Inari. Say Goodnight Gracie.
1/1/12

Ringing in the New Year always brings a lot of joy around here. And doing so with Shayla LaVeaux and Kristal Summers (sadly separately this time) adds a predictable enhancement to the experience. All in all the first of the year invariably brings even more chaos to our existence than even we generally experience. That said, you really can’t complain too much if the bedlam in your life involves a plethora of naked women. If it occasionally involves beds too, well, you get the picture … [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers, Shayla LaVeaux Video]

Design Master Kristal Summers