Filed Under: Katsuni

August 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

8/28/11	The best way to test the skills of a person trying to do a new job tends to be comparing the way they do the exact same thing as someone else has done. Like most philosophical principles, however, it tends to be difficult to test, since setting up the “exact” same task can be functionally impossible. Life simply has too many variables. Fortunately for us at risque.com some constants do exist, and we have people who have been around long enough to remember them. We’d never be so boring as to attempt a mere “Apples to Apples” analysis, however. Nope. We much prefer the “Cytherea to Cytherea” algorithm. We’re clever that way. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Missy Monroe, Jenna Presley, Angela Stone, Michael Ninn]
8/27/11	Occasionally in life you find yourself in a situation where your most sophisticated intellectual response follows generally along the lines of, “Huh. That’s odd. I wonder what in the world possessed them to do that.” … And then hopefully you do something worthwhile, like eat chocolate chocolate-chip ice cream or something. Today just might be one of those days, but when you have Shayla LaVeaux, Raquel Devine and various other miscellaneous pretty people to help you with your ruminations, you probably won’t mind very much. You will need to supply your own ice cream, however. We can only do so much. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Raquel Devine, Katsuni, Miko Lee, Olivia Del Rio Video]
8/23/11	Be careful what you wish for. And while we’re on the topic of simple advice that people almost never listen to, you might be careful about the examples you’re setting for others in life. Dedicated (or perhaps more Devious) students might take advantage of an opening to provide some teaching of their own — which the teacher will almost certainly ignore, of course. Could it be that Lessons Learned are not in fact like Bridges Burned; or could it be that “learned” doesn’t really mean what we think it means? … It’s a good thing we don’t do philosophy for a living on risque. It’s hard. … Well, we do “do” hard, but that’s a different story. [FEATURED TAGS: Renee Perez Video, Sabrina Rose Video, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com, Michael Ninn]
8/20/11	Well a warden didn’t throw a party in the county jail — at least not for anyone we know, which doesn’t say much because we don’t actually know anyone in the country jail — so we had to modify the song allusion to “Jailhouse Walk” for our purposes today. If Elvis had not died back in 1977 he would be 76 now, as all of those people remembering the anniversary of his death kept telling us this week. Of course we responded by pointing out that if Duke Albert of Austria hadn’t died on the same date, he’d be 653 today. None of that has anything whatsoever to do with Cytherea or Katja Kean, however, a fact that probably makes members feel a lot better about coming inside. [FEATURED TAGS: Katja Kean, Cytherea Video, Michael Ninn]
8/17/11	One of the exceptional benefits of having an intelligent, insightful, and interested Membership base stems from the fact that it tends to keep poor, overworked, webmasters focused on task. Of course, should any web minions make an error, a zealous Member might jump upon the oversight, resulting in general feelings of sadness around the office. Over the years we have found a rapid and complete lapse into Denial to be quite a benefit in the recovery process — even if only in the psychological sense. In addition, a quick ratchet into righteous indignation can be helpful. In this case, alas, the intelligent, insightful, and interested Member might actually be correct, so after hours and hours of anguish and pointed despair, we arrived at a fitting Official Response: “Whoops. Dang.” … Honestly descending into proper angst really takes much more devotion and dedicated attention than we were willing to devote to the project. We have many naked women to document; we’re really busy. [FEATURED TAGS: Athena Angel, Shayla LaVeaux Video]
8/14/11	Every once in awhile, no matter how long you’ve been doing something professionally, you can still be surprised — at least if you have fun doing what you do for a living. Differently in this job, most likely, you can accidentally run across a beautiful woman masturbating and it doesn’t result in some mandatory report to Human Resources (a title which takes on an entirely different connotation when you put it in terms of masturbation, actually). Should Aurora Snow be such a woman you might be inclined to comment upon how many people in the country would welcome a little “snow” in their lives right about now. But that wouldn’t be necessary, really. “Beautiful Woman Masturbating” pretty much gets people’s attention without much elaboration. [FEATURED TAGS: Aurora Snow Video, Michael Ninn]
8/13/11	The intricate process of becoming a beautiful model — with professional-level skills — took Anais, well, maybe five or six seconds as it turned out. Some people just seem to be born for the camera. And wouldn’t you know it, we just seem to always have a collection of cameras with us. Ain’t serendipity cool? … Now since this complete (this time) collection of “first time as a professional on camera” photos happened to take place in a fancy bathroom, and since we’re set to the task of reminding everyone to check Shayla.com because Shayla does some bizarre stuff over there, well, this all seemed perfect. Truth be told, though, we honestly can’t remember when an excuse to see Anais (and Shayla) naked came up that didn’t seem perfect. Odd. … [FEATURED TAGS: Anais, Shayla LaVeaux Video]
8/10/11	Chaos surrounds us! France has turned out not to be that reliable of an ally, and people have suddenly realized that the stock market may not be something that we should just play around with on a daily basis. Gosh, who knew? To provide a calming influence, we’re doing a bit of “Dee Constructing” today, providing pithy economic lessons, critical utopian philosophy, and beautiful naked women. Seriously, where can you find a better combination — even on the big ol’ World Wide Web? [FEATURED TAGS: Dee, Inari Vachs, Alektra Blue Video, Jessica Drake Video, Kirsten Price Video, Kaylani Lei Video, Mikayla Mendez Video]
8/6/11	Did you happen to know that a flibbertigibbet refers to what you might more easily recognize as an “airhead” if you tried to have a conversation with one? Now the fact that we’re ruminating upon the vast array of adjectives that have evolved throughout civilization simply to describe stupid people should not worry you at this point. You can just ignore us as usual, and get to the more centered reality of our typical discourse, that being life in the adult movie business. … Yep. Not a flibbertigibbet around here anywhere. We’re a very serious lot. What does “serious” mean again? [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Cassidey, Anna Joy, The Four Trailer Video, Michael Ninn]
8/3/11	Kristal called in the other day, very excited about a series of “Wrestling Videos” she’s set to do with our old friend Tanya Danielle. Rather than correct Dear Ms. Summers by pointing out that “video” would probably not be the technically correct term anymore, D.Minion immediately recalled that she had a photo set of Kristal and Tanya from way back, ironically at another time in her life when our Dear Kristal Summers fell into the Eager Beaver category. Granted we probably didn’t correct Kristal because many of us here still use the term “video” to describe a shoot, but it could have been the thought of soon getting to see Kristal and Tanya naked again. That can be very distracting all on its own you know. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers, Tanya Danielle, Lola, Jade Marcella]

April 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

4/30/11	So apparently they had this big wedding yesterday, and insane people over here stayed up until all hours of the morning just to watch it on TV? Well, we can’t say that this makes any sense to us California folks, but then we’ve heard the same thing said about us from other parts of the country. Did you ever embrace a reflective moment and think about just how you ended up where you did in your life? Presumably people in prison do this with some regularity, but fortunately today we’re not talking about weddings or incarceration – either of these sad situations. Today we sit down with Shayla and consider the “Origins of Porn Woman” and be honestly thrilled that the entire world doesn’t watch everything we do. Seriously. That sounds icky, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Alexis DeVell, AEE 2011, Shayla LaVeaux, Julia Ann, Cheyenne Silver, Inari Vachs, Tori Black, Tanya Tate, Phoenix Marie, Bobbi Starr, Andy San Dimas, Jesse Jane, Shy Love, Selena Rose, Natasha Nice, Kayden Kross, Jessica Drake, Riley Steele, Dana DeArmond, Bree Olsen, Prinzzess, Lupe Fuentes, Joanna Angel, Anna Lovato, Jynx Maze, Kristen Rose, Lexi Belle, Breanne Benson, Nina Hartley, Monique Alexander, Stoya, Andy San Dimas, Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
4/28/11	You know what colloquialisms are we assume? OK. So most of us have at least heard the word, and we probably have some vague idea of the meaning, although that may or may not be true. After all, it’s not like you have occasion to throw that particular English language tidbit into a conversation every day. And if you have one thing, like a colloquialism, for example, don’t sound principles of physics dictate that its direct opposite be possible too? So what’s the opposite of a colloquialism? … If you’re confused, you’ve now perfectly prepared yourself to match our condition today, so all you Members can now feel free to enter. On the upside, we do have Renee Perez playing in the shower this time around, and basically that’s not very confusing at all. [FEATURED TAGS: Renee Perez Video, Michael Ninn]
4/22/11	There are many, many ways to say Happy Birthday across the globe, yet all of them mean, “Gosh, you’re even older than you were yesterday.” As our friends get older, we have noticed a tendency to buy them gifts that we hope to get back in inheritance, though, but that’s OK, right? We should be practical after all. Also, we’re going to stop writing now so that El Jefe doesn’t have enough clues to figure out which of us wrote this introduction. Practical … [FEATURED TAGS: Tanya Cox, “The Snatch Game” ]
4/21/11	Just in case you’re ever curious, you should know that the only people that ever win in a lawsuit are the lawyers. Legal fights beat you up financially, emotionally, and depending upon how long they drag on, even spiritually. They’re not fun. Sadly, however, they are sometimes necessary. As we understand it, you’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything. All in all, the only thing you really learn from lawsuits boils down to an addition to your list of people with whom you never want to have to see ever again in your life. Sometimes the lawyers don’t end up being first on that list, but they always make the list for sure. Even for attorneys, though, all good things must come to an end, and eventually even the most acrimonious of disputes reaches some form of resolution. Today would be such a day. … Whew. [FEATURED TAGS: Vicca, Nikita, Juli Ashton, Felecia, Anna Malle, Asia Carrera, Ron Jeremy, Ninn Video, Michael Ninn]
4/18/19	Most of us would agree that only a few things in life can annoy us as much as paying taxes. We all see the need for them in the abstract, and quite honestly see the value in government services and the philanthropic concepts of helping those less fortunate than ourselves. When theory crashes into personal reality, however, you can almost hear a universal whining. If you don’t believe that just listen to the richest 10% of the people in the country bellow and start talking about the President’s citizenship every time he dares suggest they should probably try to contribute a little more to help the country get out of its economic mess – that he didn’t create, by the way, but let’s not get too bogged down in politics. … In that non-political spirit we’re dishing up our own risque brand of tax relief today. We’d be willing to bet that if you love it or hate it, you’re decision will have nothing whatsoever to with your party affiliation. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Lylith LaVey]
4/15/11	Does anyone else wonder why today doesn’t qualify as Tax Day, even though it’s a Friday and not a weekend? Nope. We didn’t either. We just said, “Whoopie! We get extra time this year!” … Of course none of us really need the extra time because we always do our taxes in January so we don’t even have to worry about it anymore. Yep. That’s our story, and we’re stickin’ to it. … You’ll find other words (and pictures) of wisdom in A Dawning today as well. What an excellent Friday. [FEATURED TAGS: Audrey Hollander, Heather Vuur, Heather Vandeven, Jassie, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Michael Ninn]
4/12/11	We would love to say that we spend hours and hours thinking up clever titles for our ever-so-insightful commentary on the risque commune sites, but that wouldn’t technically be true. Generally someone just pops off with something, the others laugh, and that’s what we go with. Sometimes, though, a couple of very good ideas get thrown into the mix, and then we have a debate, granted about the silliest of things. (That’s what Americans do, as any analysis of professional sports or politics will clearly illustrate.) Today we had “Sheen without Luster” as well as “Sheen and Lust Her” as options that we just couldn’t reach consensus on. D.Minion said she’d decide, since it was her story, after all. … Naturally D.Minion picked a third title. … It’s good to be Queen. We’re not so sure about being a Goddess, however. [FEATURED TAGS: Capri Anderson, Bree Olsen Video]
4/6/11	Back before he started making sausage, Jimmy Dean recorded a song with a chorus that began, “I won’t go huntin’ with you, Jake, but I’ll go chasin’ women.” Most of you will probably be glad to hear that this does not happen to be the song in which you can find Shayla naked in the music video. That said, as between early 1950’s country music – Ice T’s “Body Count” – and sausage, we can’t honestly say which we’d like to see made less. Shayla dancing naked is always good, however. [FEATURED TAGS: Justine Joli]
4/3/11	Last night we learned the Butler did it, if UConn believe that. … And if you don’t follow college basketball, or if you happen to be reading this years from now, that will make no sense at all. Fortunately, sexy women do tend toward the timeless and universally understood, so don’t worry yourself too much about the “strangest of the strange” around here. Both Shayla LaVeaux and Cheyenne Silver give reports today on the most recent AEE, and 247AdultStars chimes in with “visitors” Lon and D.Minion as well. All it all it’s very confusing. So go slowly and remember to breathe. Ice cream might help too. … And for all you authors that hurried your reports in because we were going to publish this a couple of days ago … um … April Fool’s. (Hey we couldn’t have used the amazingly clever and hysterical Butler/UConn comment on April 1st. See? Things tend to work out.) [FEATURED TAGS: AEE 2011, Shayla LaVeaux, Cheyenne Silver, Cytherea, Katsuni, Prinzzess, Alektra Blue, Syren, Exclusive Video]

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