Filed Under: Nikita

April 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

4/30/11	So apparently they had this big wedding yesterday, and insane people over here stayed up until all hours of the morning just to watch it on TV? Well, we can’t say that this makes any sense to us California folks, but then we’ve heard the same thing said about us from other parts of the country. Did you ever embrace a reflective moment and think about just how you ended up where you did in your life? Presumably people in prison do this with some regularity, but fortunately today we’re not talking about weddings or incarceration – either of these sad situations. Today we sit down with Shayla and consider the “Origins of Porn Woman” and be honestly thrilled that the entire world doesn’t watch everything we do. Seriously. That sounds icky, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Alexis DeVell, AEE 2011, Shayla LaVeaux, Julia Ann, Cheyenne Silver, Inari Vachs, Tori Black, Tanya Tate, Phoenix Marie, Bobbi Starr, Andy San Dimas, Jesse Jane, Shy Love, Selena Rose, Natasha Nice, Kayden Kross, Jessica Drake, Riley Steele, Dana DeArmond, Bree Olsen, Prinzzess, Lupe Fuentes, Joanna Angel, Anna Lovato, Jynx Maze, Kristen Rose, Lexi Belle, Breanne Benson, Nina Hartley, Monique Alexander, Stoya, Andy San Dimas, Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
4/28/11	You know what colloquialisms are we assume? OK. So most of us have at least heard the word, and we probably have some vague idea of the meaning, although that may or may not be true. After all, it’s not like you have occasion to throw that particular English language tidbit into a conversation every day. And if you have one thing, like a colloquialism, for example, don’t sound principles of physics dictate that its direct opposite be possible too? So what’s the opposite of a colloquialism? … If you’re confused, you’ve now perfectly prepared yourself to match our condition today, so all you Members can now feel free to enter. On the upside, we do have Renee Perez playing in the shower this time around, and basically that’s not very confusing at all. [FEATURED TAGS: Renee Perez Video, Michael Ninn]
4/22/11	There are many, many ways to say Happy Birthday across the globe, yet all of them mean, “Gosh, you’re even older than you were yesterday.” As our friends get older, we have noticed a tendency to buy them gifts that we hope to get back in inheritance, though, but that’s OK, right? We should be practical after all. Also, we’re going to stop writing now so that El Jefe doesn’t have enough clues to figure out which of us wrote this introduction. Practical … [FEATURED TAGS: Tanya Cox, “The Snatch Game” ]
4/21/11	Just in case you’re ever curious, you should know that the only people that ever win in a lawsuit are the lawyers. Legal fights beat you up financially, emotionally, and depending upon how long they drag on, even spiritually. They’re not fun. Sadly, however, they are sometimes necessary. As we understand it, you’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything. All in all, the only thing you really learn from lawsuits boils down to an addition to your list of people with whom you never want to have to see ever again in your life. Sometimes the lawyers don’t end up being first on that list, but they always make the list for sure. Even for attorneys, though, all good things must come to an end, and eventually even the most acrimonious of disputes reaches some form of resolution. Today would be such a day. … Whew. [FEATURED TAGS: Vicca, Nikita, Juli Ashton, Felecia, Anna Malle, Asia Carrera, Ron Jeremy, Ninn Video, Michael Ninn]
4/18/19	Most of us would agree that only a few things in life can annoy us as much as paying taxes. We all see the need for them in the abstract, and quite honestly see the value in government services and the philanthropic concepts of helping those less fortunate than ourselves. When theory crashes into personal reality, however, you can almost hear a universal whining. If you don’t believe that just listen to the richest 10% of the people in the country bellow and start talking about the President’s citizenship every time he dares suggest they should probably try to contribute a little more to help the country get out of its economic mess – that he didn’t create, by the way, but let’s not get too bogged down in politics. … In that non-political spirit we’re dishing up our own risque brand of tax relief today. We’d be willing to bet that if you love it or hate it, you’re decision will have nothing whatsoever to with your party affiliation. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Lylith LaVey]
4/15/11	Does anyone else wonder why today doesn’t qualify as Tax Day, even though it’s a Friday and not a weekend? Nope. We didn’t either. We just said, “Whoopie! We get extra time this year!” … Of course none of us really need the extra time because we always do our taxes in January so we don’t even have to worry about it anymore. Yep. That’s our story, and we’re stickin’ to it. … You’ll find other words (and pictures) of wisdom in A Dawning today as well. What an excellent Friday. [FEATURED TAGS: Audrey Hollander, Heather Vuur, Heather Vandeven, Jassie, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Michael Ninn]
4/12/11	We would love to say that we spend hours and hours thinking up clever titles for our ever-so-insightful commentary on the risque commune sites, but that wouldn’t technically be true. Generally someone just pops off with something, the others laugh, and that’s what we go with. Sometimes, though, a couple of very good ideas get thrown into the mix, and then we have a debate, granted about the silliest of things. (That’s what Americans do, as any analysis of professional sports or politics will clearly illustrate.) Today we had “Sheen without Luster” as well as “Sheen and Lust Her” as options that we just couldn’t reach consensus on. D.Minion said she’d decide, since it was her story, after all. … Naturally D.Minion picked a third title. … It’s good to be Queen. We’re not so sure about being a Goddess, however. [FEATURED TAGS: Capri Anderson, Bree Olsen Video]
4/6/11	Back before he started making sausage, Jimmy Dean recorded a song with a chorus that began, “I won’t go huntin’ with you, Jake, but I’ll go chasin’ women.” Most of you will probably be glad to hear that this does not happen to be the song in which you can find Shayla naked in the music video. That said, as between early 1950’s country music – Ice T’s “Body Count” – and sausage, we can’t honestly say which we’d like to see made less. Shayla dancing naked is always good, however. [FEATURED TAGS: Justine Joli]
4/3/11	Last night we learned the Butler did it, if UConn believe that. … And if you don’t follow college basketball, or if you happen to be reading this years from now, that will make no sense at all. Fortunately, sexy women do tend toward the timeless and universally understood, so don’t worry yourself too much about the “strangest of the strange” around here. Both Shayla LaVeaux and Cheyenne Silver give reports today on the most recent AEE, and 247AdultStars chimes in with “visitors” Lon and D.Minion as well. All it all it’s very confusing. So go slowly and remember to breathe. Ice cream might help too. … And for all you authors that hurried your reports in because we were going to publish this a couple of days ago … um … April Fool’s. (Hey we couldn’t have used the amazingly clever and hysterical Butler/UConn comment on April 1st. See? Things tend to work out.) [FEATURED TAGS: AEE 2011, Shayla LaVeaux, Cheyenne Silver, Cytherea, Katsuni, Prinzzess, Alektra Blue, Syren, Exclusive Video]

August 2010 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

8/31/10	Did you ever see The Wedding Crashers? … Well we can assure you that you’ve never seen the concept explored quite the way that Cytherea does it. Come to think of it, Cy’s little “version” might have made a wonderful addition to the actual movie, and would even have contributed some exceptional comedic tension. … Of course if they had included this Cytherea bit, the movie probably wouldn’t have played in as many theaters as it did. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea]
8/27/10	Let’s say you’d really enjoy a job where all you have to do all day long boils down to taking pictures of Shayla LaVeaux naked. In that case odds seem good that you’d feel like you have a pretty darned good job. It would also mean, of course, that you have D.Minion’s job, and if you’re curious – at least the way she explains it – you’ll have to pry the job out of her cold, dead, fingers. Of course that would be another issue altogether. Still it always makes us happy when we can work a Constitutional allegory into an adult web site introduction, and let’s face it, a naked Shayla LaVeaux pretty much makes everybody happy. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux]
8/25/10	As much as it seems like we try to avoid current events around here, sometimes we just can’t ignore them. To wit, Lon noticed an amazingly relevant article in his local Las Vegas paper that could have deeply personal ramifications for all of us at the January convention. It brings into play the potential for pithy commentary from our British arm, via the reporting of Dear Maverick, and it may quell feelings of despair for a situation that last year we felt portended ill for our favorite bargain lodging on the Strip. … To make it a little more interesting, assuming it be possible that you’re not planning on attending AVN’s annual shin-dig, we have also popped in a few rather sultry photos of Inari Vachs in bright yellow thigh-high boots that we’ve had floating around the office for some time. That always brightens a day, and, besides, how many times do you really get to say “to wit” in life? [FEATURED TAGS: Inari Vachs]
8/22/10	We have formally resolved, you may be glad to hear, to keep putting the “fun” back in dysfunctional. … OK. So as a technical matter that falls more into the “analysis of our usual situation made by a visiting friend this past week” than it does the “resolution” category. Still, we can’t see anything particularly wrong with this approach to life, and we certainly can’t argue with the assessment. If nothing else, today’s editorial and accompanying view of obscure architecture illustrates our philosophy perfectly. Don’t you just love it when that happens? [FEATURED TAGS: Tenaya Video, Erica McLean Video]
8/18/10	You English majors out there may remember that the final line of The Great Gatsby reads, “So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.” Now if you’ve actually read the book you’ll probably be a little worried here, but we can assure you that D.Minion’s fond account of Vicca and Nikita happens to be a whole lot more cheery than the resolution with Jay Gatsby (or Nick Carraway, if you’re a stickler for literary details). Let’s face it: If you feel a need to look back on life, having two beautiful Russian women in it helps a whole heck of a lot. [FEATURED TAGS: Vicca, Nikita, Juli Ashton, Doria,Savannah, Gina Stasia, Diva, Alexandra Silk, Shelly Jones, Angela Ayers]
8/13/10	Now supposing you had a “leader” (of some sort or another) whose parents gave him the name “Lucky” at birth. You might be inclined to think that Friday the 13^th could turn out to be atypically interesting days for folks that hang around with this chap, right? (Hey, after you’ve seen the name “Lucky” printed on an actual driver’s license, the whole leap into numerology and mythology really doesn’t take much. Trust us.) … At any rate, because of this special day, we decided to break our usual tradition and do back to back posts regarding the lovely Tenaya. It turns out the last entry stirred some feelings around here, and if an adult web site can’t share some stirring feelings with you, well what good are they anyway? [FEATURED TAGS: Tenaya]
8/9/10	Most of you know how much we love to celebrate holidays around here, so we just had to do something special this morning. … What holiday, you may wonder? … Why, naturally, it’s “eight, nine, ten” – and you don’t even have to be a history (or math) whiz to know that this just doesn’t happen very often. Odds are good we’ll be around for “nine, ten, eleven” and probably even “ten, eleven, twelve” – but after that all bets are off. If any of us are around for the next “eight, nine, ten” well, we’d better be a lot richer by then. That’s all we have to say. Well, except that we’re celebrating today with Tenaya. We should probably mention that. [FEATURED TAGS: Tenaya Video]
8/7/10	Kristal Summers makes a darned fine office assistant, an assessment you’ll likely agree with after today. Of course Kristal Summers makes a darned fine almost anything, so perhaps that’s not saying much. On the other hand, when you have an entire day devoted to Kristal, how much time do you really need to waste saying anything at all? [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers]
8/3/10	If you think of the lyrics “What EVA … Cocks Your Pistol, What EVA … Toots Your Whistle” and then you think of a clever parody of a classic Statler Brothers song, well, you’d have the same brain as exactly one person in the office here. If, however, when you think of EVA you think of “Angelina” why then you’d match everyone else. Depending upon whom you ask here, you’d either be a very savvy aficionado of adult movie fare, or woefully ignorant in your knowledge of 1970’s country music. You get to determine whether a failure in either area bothers you more as you go with D.Minion coincidentally on set with Eva Angelina. We should warn you: This will be one of those “better have a beer with you” sorts of posts. Maybe two. [FEATURED TAGS: Eva Angelina, Angela Stone, AJ Bailey, Joey Valentine, Wanda Curtis, Michael Ninn]

Stars:A.J. Bailey| Alexandra Silk| Angela Ayers| Angela Stone| Cytherea| Diva| Doria| Erica McLean| Eva Angelina| Gina Stasia| Inari Vachs| Joey Valentine| Juli Ashton| Kristal Summers| Michael Ninn| Nikita| Savannah| Shelly Jones| Tenaya| Vicca| Wanda Curtis

Year:2010

Month:August

May 2010 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

5/30/10	Can you look back at any particular group of days in your life and think, “You know, that was really, really good … “? We assume that almost all of us can do that, and if you can’t, well we’re sincerely very sorry for you. That said, you should really get about setting up one of those times for yourself, and we’ve helpfully provided some suggestions here today. Just as a hint: It helps if you can bring along a few beautiful porn stars. Having someone else foot the bill turns out to be important too. Things definitely don’t go better with broke. [FEATURED TAGS: Vicca, Nikita, Lola, Doria, Heather Hunter, Lexus Locklear]
5/28/10	Advertising Campaigns don’t usually set themselves up as themes in our little Risqué Commune world, but they do seem rather prevalent around here over the past month or so. Consequently, when we decided to keep plodding though all the Dee at KSEX Coverage, the slight (but ever-so-beautiful) bonus at the conclusion became interestingly appropriate. Also, assuming things go according to plan, we’ve now set the stage for a more significant Advertising Campaign Contribution in the future. Of course according to plan always seems to be the wild card around here. One thing about it, our lives are never boring. [FEATURED TAGS: KSEX Radio, Dee, Kinzie Kenner, Lexie L’Amour, Stella]
5/23/10	If you’ll pardon the potentially politically incorrect influence for a moment, we’ll tell you that although we’ve shown all manner of “chicks” around here, this might be the first time we’ve actually shown you chickens. And what, you might wonder, do chickens have to do with Maverick’s observations (and various levels of stalking) with Days 3 & 4 of the most recent AEE? Well, we would tell you, should we deign to answer such a reasonable question, not so much really. On the other hand in this case they do work as a metaphor for the condition that arises when you take a boy out of his normal element and he seeks to commune with nature. Being potentially politically incorrect can be pretty deep it seems. [FEATURED TAGS: AdultStars247.com, Lexi Love, Tori Black, Nyomi Banxxx, Gina Lynn, Nina Hartley, Bree Olsen, Sasha Grey, Jana Jordan, Belladonna, Sunny Lane, Kaylani Lei, Kayden Kross, Monique Alexander, Alexis Texas, Raven Alexis, Sunset Thomas, Shauna Sand, Kelli McCarty, Sunny Leone, AJ Bailey, Riley Steele, Julia Ann, Raylene, Teagan Presley, Exclusive Video]
5/20/10	I wanted to call this “Cytherea Flies Solo Anew” but D.Minion said that would be overly erudite. (Yeah, she talks like that.) Of course “anew” she wouldn’t go for it. … Now how’s that for not overly erudite? … We should probably get to the story. It’s always a bit scary when we start making editorial comments before the author even gets a chance to start the actual article about which we sit posed to comment. … Hmm. Maybe we can be overly erudite. … Ah, well, Too erudite is human. To eschew sublime. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Exclusive Video ]
5/14/10	Confounded you may be by the conceptual alliteration levied today, although you should find it fairly easy to ignore the intrusion into a part of your brain you weren’t seeking to stretch at this time. It’s the latest in the Shayla scenario, and that fairly well covers all the important part. Should you feel particularly erudite, you may also enjoy D.Minion’s Intelligence Quotient contribution, although we’ll tell you right up front that if you happen to be an English Major who grew up on a farm, it will enhance the likelihood of your success. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video, Brynn Tyler Video]
5/10/10	Quick to correct a cultural error, we are. And talk like Yoda, we might. On the other hand, in case you’re curious, we also understand The Trouble with Tribbles. Of course that doesn’t do much to explain the rather festive lesbian liaison we have on tap today between Paola Rey and Marlie Moore, but how much explaining does that really need anyway. Heck it’s probably in the part you just skip over anyway. For what it’s worth, we’d advise against that, honestly. “Once you start down the Dark Path, forever will it dominate your destiny. Consume you it will.” [FEATURED TAGS: Paola Rey, Marlie Moore]
5/8/10	Have you ever seriously considered doing something just because it sounds fun, even if pure logic would probably recommend against the idea? And then have you ever considered that this illogical idea probably sounds “fun” just because it will involve regular interaction with a spectacularly sexy woman? And have you cared? … Well, we’re big fans of sexy women around here, and although we haven’t quite “decided’ what precisely we’re going to do, odds seem good that you’ll enjoy the thought process here. [FEATURED TAGS: Audrey Hollander, Kimberly Kane, Madison Scott, Erica McLean]
5/5/10	Naturally we celebrate Cinco de Mayo every year around here. We’re deep believers in the benefits of cross-cultural understanding, the recognition of world history, and the progressive evolution that marks the ongoing transcendence of the human spirit as it seeks its peaceful nirvana. Also, we pretty much go for anything that includes a party with tequila and guacamole dip. Now our newest risqué office member put together the post for today, and we’ll freely admit that he may have missed the entirely accurate mark. Just as soon as we recover from the cerveza tomorrow we’re going to do a little bit of explaining to him too. Still, what we lack in technical accuracy we more than make up for in raucous conviviality. [FEATURED TAGS: Jessi Palmer Video]
5/2/10	Porn Stars can actually teach us a lot. Now we’d be the first to admit that not everything they can teach us will turn out to be extraordinarily valuable on a regular basis, but any artisan can tell you that a lot of truly fine work in the world starts with simply possessing the right tools for the job. And let’s face it: Who can really tell us better how to handle uncomfortable questions or situations than a Porn Star? And given Dee’s attire during the contribution today, we’re reasonably certain you won’t care if you ever have a reason to put any of the more erudite recommendations to use anyway. [FEATURED TAGS: Dee]

October 2008 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

10/28/08	Apparently the “business” Internet connections in the U.K. don’t function the same way as the ISPs do over here in civilization. Poor Maverick has waited almost a week to get his connection back, as they keep sending someone out to “try something” and then it doesn’t work so they just promise another technician will be by in 24-48 hours. … For our part we decided to help the chap out by posting his 247 update and telling everyone about it here. This method has the distinct benefit of allowing us to say pretty much whatever we want, and he can’t even check it to defend himself. We’re off to LA for the next “super-secret” shoot, but rumor has it that we’ll at least be able to talk about it next week, so that’s a plus. First thing we’ll do when we get back this weekend will be to make corrections to protect Mav’s reputation. … Probably. It would be wrong to title this Sandie Caine is Able, right? [FEATURED TAGS: 247AdultStars.com, Sandie Caine]
10/24/08	So it may not rank up there with Aristotle and the Round Earth theory, or Pythagoras and his Theorum(s), or Newton and the Apple on the some silly scale like “change the evolution of human thought and civilization” or anything, but today a new risqué author confronts a challenge of impressive proportions as he attempts to set about placing porn in relative perspective. That said, we will warn you: History is good — often sad, generally misremembered, and continually open to debate, but “good” in a wholesome sense of the word. Our dear historian here, however, should probably spend just a little more time on the language arts, however, at the very least learning a few more words. He should be more intrepid, for example. For our part, consider this a most winsome threesome. [FEATURED TAGS: Monique Alexander, Penny Flame, Charlie Laine]
10/20/08	It seems that the St. Louis Rams have suddenly decided that they’re a professional football team. Hmm. Apparently some things do change. Closer to home, D.Minion has decided that she’s a “very” big fan of Dee, Mr Marcus, and Juli Ashton. Hmm. … And apparently some things do not change. Now if you’ve decided not to watch the Broncos on Monday Night Football on ESPN this evening, because you really don’t care, you at least have some other — certainly more nude — forms of entertainment with which to fill your time. Naturally we don’t understand that decision, since these video clips will be here tomorrow too, but you do have that options. … See? Some things definitely do not change. [FEATURED TAGS: Juli Ashton Video, Dee Video, Taren Steele, Charlie, Nikita, Shayla LaVeaux, Rayveness, Vicca, Exclusive Video]
10/16/08	Maverick has a bit to say about Harry’s last party today, what with him being all in the party mood again with Vegas and mucho porn partying on the horizon. For our part we bring some party favors in the form of a delicate “Pink Package” to add to the festivities. That’s said, it’s still before Halloween here and before the Presidential Election, as you certainly can’t miss hearing about unless you’re living under a rock or something. Still, according to many, many television commercials, they’re even “finding the Internet” under remote rocks these days, so who knows? We do know that the candidates ought to address the resilient “truth in advertising” issue tonight, along with the more predictable “Economy” and “War” and “Ain’t this current President sucky?” comments. Thinking about Halloween, D.Minion has already begun buying candy (because she loves any excuse for sugar), and yesterday we ate an entire bag of Smarties in the office. You know that this morning not a one of us felt appreciably more intelligent at all? Fortunately, you don’t have to be really bright to know what “Pink Package” refers to. That’s handy. … [FEATURED TAGS: 247AdultStars.com, Wendy Divine, Chasey Lain]
10/9/08	Ah, but sometimes you just love the easy ones. Not that we’re saying you could consider Lorraine Sisco “easy” , of course. Because that would be wrong. But during her Tall Goddess days she certainly qualified as a daring and curious lass, and to her credit she hasn’t forgotten the fun of that type of — call it performance. Also when the entire focus today has to do with a refreshingly positive outlook on higher education in America, well, you take your respites when you can. If congress hasn’t taught us anything lately, we should at least try to remember that. Well, we should remember that and it’s very good to be an AIG executive. [FEATURED TAGS: Tall Goddess Video, Exclusive Video]
10/5/08	Juli Ashton celebrates a birthday today, and thus D.Minion happily compiled a celebration in her own odd way. Imagine that. … Then we pointed out that Juli shares a birthday with one of the original risqué contribution team, and yet D.Minion has overlooked him completely. As only DM can do, when faced with the apparent contradiction, she explained simply, “But it’s Juli.” Oh. That helps. We’ve given a more complete analysis of the — call it thought process — here, just in case you decide that watching the NFL seems like a good plan. [FEATURED TAGS: Juli Ashton, D.Minion]
10/3/08	You ever meet anyone that just can’t throw anything away? To these unusual creatures “old, obscure, and useless” somehow morphs in their brains into “retro, cool, and valuable,” and most of (read: sane among) us have no idea how this happens. Well, D.Minion has been a bit ill lately, giving her an unusual amount of time wandering the recesses of her … um … unique abode. Understanding that this place boasts overflowing shelves of Sonny and Cher dolls, you can see that it always frightens us when DM spends too much time there. The brain can only take so much 70’s influence before it starts rebelling, at least that’s our theory. Now consider the “super-secret extra collection” of risqué memorabilia she unearthed recently, and you have some idea of what you’re in for today. It won’t make anything easier to “grok” (since we’re using retro terms), but sometimes just trying to figure out how you got to a place can help. At least you can try to avoid the problem in the future. For our part we’ve issued an official memo forbidding D.Minion from ever getting sick again. [FEATURED TAGS: Keri Windsor, Rayveness, Alexis DeVell Juli Ashton, Taylor Hayes, Taren Steele, D.Minion]

Stars:Alexis DeVell Juli Ashton| Charlie| Charlie Laine| Chasey Lain| Dee| Keri Windsor| Monique Alexander| Nikita| Penny Flame| Rayveness| Sandie Caine| Shayla LaVeaux| Tall Goddess| Taren Steele| Taylor Hayes| Vicca| Wendy Divine

Year:2008

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