Maya Divine Archives

4/29/13	How many adult web sites can you think of that spend any time at all talking about the weather? Well, this one does, but in all honesty we have historically shunned any attempts to find out if people ever question our sanity. Seriously, what good can ever come of a question like that? At best you learn what you already know, and at worst … well, let’s just get on with our weather forecast with Keri Windsor, shall we? … Beats the heck out of some graphical map with a bunch of “Ls” and “Hs” all over it. [STAR TAGS: Kylie Ireland Video, Keri Windsor Video]
4/25/13	Apparently the NFL Draft begins tonight, with all sort of people simply thrilled beyond belief that they will have something new to talk about in a sport that will not even see competitive action for another five months or so. Of course these same people have been spending time listening to a radio station where people call in and ask what might hypothetically happen if any number of a lengthy string of variables turn out in one precise way. So there’s that. … All in all, the whole Ménage à Trois competition seems easier to understand, so we mainly consider that instead. [STAR TAGS: Meghan Sweet, Hanna Reilly, Jenna Jameson Video, Eva Tiffany Video]
4/21/13	April 22^nd — a fine day in many regards — also happens to celebrate Earth Day once again, so we should be fruitful and multiply, or multiply some fruit trees, or conifers or something. You should probably not try to be overly fruitful with conifers in private, however, as that sounds like it might hurt. In our Risqué Business efforts to contribute to a Green Earth, we have thoughtfully provided some soothing activities for afterwards courtesy of Shayla LaVeaux and Wendy Divine, actually. Heck, you probably won’t even have time to look up the word deciduous. [STAR TAGS: Wendy Divine, Maya Divine, Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video]
4/20/13	Helen Keller said, “The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched – they must be felt with the heart.’ … With all due respect to the wonderful contributions to the world made by Ms. Keller, it still seems like it might be better to be able to see TJ Hart and Randy Spears today. Seriously, “heartfelt” takes on a whole new dimension. In the vein (speaking of hearts, and all), we would like to publicly thank Kylie Ireland for her ever-unique contributions to our little group. Also, we would like to apologize for our pundit influence on her team. … Um … Oops. [STAR TAGS: TJ Hart Video]
4/15/13	It would seem appropriate on this particular date in America to offer up some decidedly non-taxable benefits for our members. We even go so far as to tip our hats to the Living Art of Cytherea — happily without needing to declare those tips, per se. We fully intended to work the U.K. taxation system into this introduction as well until we realized that even as a group we understand their methodology even less than we understand our own. We did come up with a question, however: If you decide to masturbate in the “Loo,” does that make you Looney? [STAR TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, Shayla LaVeaux, 247AdultStars.com]
4/9/13	Protracted political observations highlight our insights today, certainly destined to keep you awake at night trying to reconcile centuries-old principles with policy for a modern and progressive America. Or you might prefer to look at the fun photos Kristal Summers sends in from her cell phone, or even watch Kristal and Shayla in nude preparation for — well, predictable — future interaction. We of course think you should spend valuable time thinking about contemporary political issues, but have provided handy-dandy icons to skip over those wordy parts — just in case. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Kristal Summers Exclusive Video]
4/6/13	We had a deeply thought-provoking and erudite (at least in a music history sense) introduction ready today, involving legends Tina Turner and Rod Stewart pairing for a grand display. Then someone (We will not mention who, but it rhymes with C.Minion) pointed out that Donny and Marie also sang It Takes Two. Basically that killed the whole idea. One can in fact know too much music history as it turns out. You will have to fill in your own intro for “What’s in Two Names?” Sorry about that. [STAR TAGS: Madison Chandler, Jeanie Marie Sullivan Video]
4/1/13	Somewhere along the line we all learned that “fools rush in where brave men fear to tread.” Of course none of us really “tread” all that much anymore, preferring to mosey, chill, blend, or some other term you have to be freshly out of your teens to even know. Those with skills born of long experience among us may even saunter, but nobody treads. Of course by the time you may be reading this, we have no idea what the current expression for “hanging out” will be, but you should be doing that as you read some righteous news today. Groovy. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Sunny Leone, Julie Cash, Kylie Ireland Video, Julia Ann Video, Michael Ninn]

12/31/12	Who knew that by watching a highly anticipated (well, by some) football game you could be inundated with advertisements for a new television show on AMC featuring “Competitive Taxidermy” of all things? Who knew that taxidermy could be competitive? … Who knew they even still did taxidermy? We have some other thoughts on year’s end today, none of which feature dead animals, just in case you were curious. [FEATURED TAGS: Happy New Year!]
12/29/12	You may not have noticed, but if you put all the College Bowl Games together, you could have a heck of a party. You could wear Russel Athletics or New Era Pinstripes, if you knew what those were, maybe. You’d have Tostitos, Buffalo Wings, Idaho Potatoes, Chick-fil-A, Little Caesars Pizza, and even Beef ‘O’ Brady and Outback to eat. You could decorate the place with roses, sip orange juice while you get some sugar from your sweetie, and even stuff cotton in your ears if she started complaining that you were not fighting her hunger with Kraft sufficiently. You’d have wonderful things to talk about like insurance, or car care, wireless services, or taxes, mortgages, or Korean cars. You could even discuss what the heck scantily-clad women and beautiful race car drivers have to do with web domain registration. Best of all, you’d have a Bell Helicopter to escape if some folks started remembering the Alamo a bit too enthusiastically. … Fortunately, none of that had anything to do with even more Shayla today. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video]
12/27/12	Shayla has a special day today well worthy of celebrating. Also in our occasionally not completely behind efforts to bring the really old pages up to modern standards, we will run across some original photos now and again. We weren’t horribly disorganized back in those days, but if someone had told us the sites would last this long, we would have done things differently. … It’s sort of like that old saying, “You know, if I’d have known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.” … Except we still get Shayla naked. That helps a lot with most things. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Alexandra Silk, Missy]
12/25/12	We wish you a Merry Christmas. And if you do not happen to celebrate Christmas, well we wish you a merry day of the miscellaneous variety. We’re friendly that way. [FEATURED TAGS: Kylie Ireland]
12/24/12	Too often in life we lose old friends, whether that be to any of the Big Three options — Sex, Love, Money — or not. Of course “losing” implies a lot of stuff way too deep for discussion here, and sometimes you just want to dance around in a circle like some Charles M. Schultz character not yet burdened by anything really icky — like three dimensions. Say, for example, if you “lose old friends” but then they come back, were they really lost — or simply slapping you upside the face with preternatural insight? … Yeah. We don’t care either. … Basically Kylie makes everything better in our experience. Anything else, well that’s too deep for our pond. [FEATURED TAGS: Kylie Ireland, Anais Video]
12/21/12	We could hardly deny that we have been guilty of perpetrating some fairly tortured logic in our quests to tie miscellaneous bits of our lives together so that we might present it for your viewing pleasure. Of course all of this pales in comparison with trying to explicate poetry from 1788. Fortunately, you can easily enjoy Cytherea — in cam show and still form — as well as Kelly Kline, without any iambic pentameter at all. They are women without meter, after all. [FEATURED TAGS: Kelly Kline, Cytherea Exclusive Video]
12/18/12	We learned on some crime show the other night that a pig’s orgasm can last up to 30 minutes. Now we’re on enough weird Google Search lists somebody keeps compiled somewhere, so we chose not to really pursue the statement any further, but we did realize that if true this sort of adds a whole new dimension to the expression, “In a pig’s eye,” does it not? … Hey, you spend a few hours watching Dee do a DP and a fine Brit offer up Holiday greetings, and see how your brain feels. [FEATURED TAGS: Dee Video, Juli Ashton, May, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com, Michael Ninn]
12/17/12	You have to be careful how much you really think about things, because you can wind up somewhere no one actually intended. Of course we have found that beer does a dandy job in relieving a befuddled state — or at least it seems to — but if you have to drive somewhere, consider ice cream in its place. Whatever the case, you may find simply looking at (or watching) Shayla LaVeaux, as well as Wendy Divine, might be the best approach this time around. Either that or you might need a lot of ice cream. [FEATURED TAGS: Wendy Divine, Maya Divine, Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Capri Anderson Exclusive Video]
12/12/12	Naturally we had to do an update at 12:12 on 12/12/12 because otherwise D.Minion would be very sad. Worse yet, then we couldn’t make it up to her for 100 years, by which point she’d be not only officially peeved, but also really, really old. Fortunately Mr. Ninn and Cytherea happen by to help us reach our desired goal, even if the precise timing might be a bit difficult to prove in court or anything. If it’s always 5:00 somewhere, then it stands to reason that it’s always 12:12 somewhere too, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Jordan Video, Cassidey Video, Renee Perez Video, Brea Bennett Video, Nikki Kane Video, Shayla LaVeaux, Vicca, Shayla LaVeaux, Ashley Renee, Paisley Hunter, Payton Alexander, Ruby, Kortknee, Emanuelle, Jill Kelly, Michael Ninn]
12/10/12	In case any of you were thinking about moving into the middle of nowhere to be with Steve, he has some excellent news for you. Although the temperature outside when he woke up yesterday morning had only reached nine degrees, by mid day the thermometer had skyrocketed to a balmy ten on the Fahrenheit scale. … OR you could plan on meeting Kristal in Florida next time she visits. All in all, that might be warmer. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers Video]
12/7/12	Most of you have probably barely been able to contain your excitement at the prospect of catching even a glimpse of Cytherea’s personal valet, MrT, in some photographs. Well, we can happily tell you that your wait is finally over! Woo-HOO! … Now we did have to surround those two or three important photos with a bunch more of Cytherea shaving and getting tattoos applied to make her scars less distracting on video, of course. But you can just ignore all those annoying porn star images and enjoy MrT — at least his hands and the back of his head. In case you were curious, Cy does always use waterproof temporary tattoos. Turns out that’s a good thing. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Video, Cate Harrington Exclusive Video, Natalia Forrest Exclusive Video, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]
12/4/12	You probably noticed that we have all now officially reached the season where we can start thinking about the cool presents we want other people to give us for free again. True, retailers seem to be making “this time of year” fall earlier and earlier on the calendar, but once we hit December it seems fair for all of us to acknowledge it in general. Even if next year they start advertising Christmas right after the 4th of July, we will still look forward to the holiday offerings from Sam Phillips, actually. She has a unique way, that Sam. [FEATURED TAGS: Sam Phillips, Tasha Reign, Breanne Benson, Sophia Knight]
12/2/12	Lamentations abound today regarding the rapid demise of Flash becoming more and more apparent. Less bothersome to our leadership at least will be the reference to the public disintegration of a heretofore quite pompous organization in the National Football League. On the off chance that neither of these two topics hold any interest for you, we sneak in an announcement that might, and if that doesn’t work we have over 30 minutes of video that might give you a pleasant “mind space” in which to ruminate — or whatever. [FEATURED TAGS: Dee Video, Kylie Ireland, Cytherea Video, Michael Ninn]