Filed Under: Alexis Texas

June 2014 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

6/29/14

Beware the Caption Conflagration today, although we have made it fairly easy to avoid, what with us being all kind and benevolent and stuff. We have also provided excellent diversion in the form of Shayla LaVeaux and U.K. star Chantelle Fox. You may consider them separate, but equal, in fine constitutional manner. We did need to say for the record, though, that the Sonny and Cher references were not our fault. … [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Chantelle Fox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]

Chantelle Fox
6/23/14

Do you know the difference between a complex sentence and a cat? Well as it turns out you can learn some fun things while reading Stephen King — a chap possessing a literary expertise you will likely never, ever see around here quite honestly. On the other hand, you will find us substantially less gruesome as a rule too, and we have a lot more beautiful naked women. So there’s that. … Oh! The difference between a complex sentence and a cat? … One has claws at the end of its paws … [STAR TAGS: Juli Ashton, Shayla LaVeaux, Dee, Alexis DeVell, Kaylan Nicole, Taylor Hayes, Chasey Lain, Devinn Lane, Doria, Jenna Jameson, Renee LaRue]

Juli Ashton
6/19/14

We all like watching athletes going for the win. If we’re going to live vicariously through them, we sort of expect them to do things we cannot accomplish on our own, after all. Being extra-special, naturally, Cytherea takes that concept one consonant further as she opts to go for the “Wynn” — as in Tyla. Interestingly enough, as she adds one little letter, Cytherea removes all of their clothes. Seems like an excellent trade for the vicarious amongst us. [STAR TAGS: Cytherea Video, Tyla Wynn Video, Roxetta, Michael Ninn]

Tyla Wynn on Cytherea
6/15/14

One could make an argument that the sum total of all human knowledge appears somewhere on a t-shirt. “Never underestimate the immense power of Stupid People in large groups” seems to be the current office favorite, although between all of us, we have quite a selection. We could easily have “What’s your funniest t-shirt?” in the job application form, truth be told. On a topic completely unrelated to stupid people — and not in a large group anyway — we get well read with Riley Reid for a bit today. [STAR TAGS: Riley Reid, Kylie Ireland Video]

Riley Reid
6/12/14

Nobody likes missing “The Moment” at any time. When, however, “The Moment” includes an afternoon alone in a hotel room with Shayla LaVeaux while she finds various locations in which she might masturbate, well, some of those “nobody” people that missed This Moment really don’t seem all that happy about it. Seems odd, right? They get to see the pictures (and video) just like everyone else. Sheesh. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Exclusive Video, Megan Foxx, Sunny Lane, Sasha Heart, Nicki Hunter, Erica McLean]

Not Shayla. But Also Cute.
6/7/14

Testosterone just complicates things. We get the whole “necessary for the survival of the species” thing, but if you ever get a chance to visit a movie set for a show that has no males in the cast, that should be the one you make room for in your schedule. You know how obnoxious — and a little pitiful — men can be in a bar situation where they’re just hoping to get laid? Just imagine the strutting they do on a movie set where they know they’re going to. If deflated male egos did not result in time delays from deflated male “other parts” we might actually be honest about how the women on set view them. [STAR TAGS: Alexis Texas, Ashli Orion, Audrey Bitoni, Brynn Tyler, Jordan Kingsley, Kagney Linn Karter, Kayla Carrera, London Keyes, Tory Lane, Penny Flame, Nina Hartley]

Alexis Texas
6/4/14

Woe be to us and the burdensome tasks we face spending quality time with porn stars. We remain dedicated professionals, however, withstanding vast personal difficulty while bringing in the story. Hey, if you think you have ever felt like an insignificant anonymous person before, you ought to try walking into a casino with Kristal Summers. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers, Shayla LaVeaux]

On Seeing Kristal Summers
6/1/14

The question “May I?”might be rather ingrained into anyone that went to school in America, but clearly the teachers did not have “Dee’s May” in mind when they came up with their lesson plans. Should you be a Member, then you might see “May We Please” at a different level, and as a completely different sentence fragment. Should you not be a Member, well, then that’s sad. May — the Force — IS with us. [STAR TAGS: Dee Video, Juli Ashton Video, May Video, Jade Marcella]

Juli Ashton, May, and Dee
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Alexis Texas to a Tea (Time)

Setting the Moods by Ides de Marzo Here’s a startling revelation: People that make their livings naked can be a moody and temperamental bunch. Men, of course, have only two basic moods — hungry and horny — and you will invariably find them either happy or sad depending upon how long it has been since […]
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March 2014 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

3/31/14

Your basic “cowgirl” doesn’t really wear a purple snakeskin hat and shiny pink pants. Of course you’d think that even your basic adult movie star should probably remember if she ever had anal sex on camera before. As it turns out, our basic risqué cowgirl happens to be Kristal Summers, and seeing as how the hat and pants happen to be the only things she ends up wearing for this layout, we didn’t actually get too wrapped up in genre accuracy. Go figure. As for the second theory here, well, according to Cytherea, some of those early years are still a little murky to the lass. We call that one Forgotten Butt, of Course. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers, Cytherea Video]

Kristal Summers
3/27/14

Odds seem good that we have all met one of those people that will proudly explain how little ego they have. There seem to be quite a lot of them, for whatever reason, and not one of them has ever learned the word “irony” or the Concept of Karma. If you have known one of these people for a long time, however, retrospect can tug on a few different emotions in us. People don’t simply stop being friends because they somehow jump from fame to infamy, but that can be difficult to explain to someone new to the environment. Take Marc Wallice and Jenna Jameson, for example. [STAR TAGS: Jenna Jameson Video, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Christi Lake Video]

Jenna Jameson & Marc Wallice
3/21/14

People into Numerology must think that 3/21/14 would be an excellent day to do something special. Look at it: There’s a hidden seven and all kinds of threes in there. That’s got to count for something, right? … OK. So technically none of us knows the first thing about numerology, but we do recognize the heat in (and on) Alexis Texas having sex, and seriously, that probably gets more attention than numbers anyway. [STAR TAGS: Alexis Texas Exclusive Video]

Ms. Texas, Probably Considering Numerology
3/17/14

According to Rich Gannon on NFL Radio — the acknowledged expert on everything, of course — people will consume 13 million pints of Guinness on this St. Patrick’s Day. Factoring in our contribution, that means the rest of the world needs to be responsible for somewhere in the vicinity of 12,999,991 pints today. Now we don’t know where all of that will come from, but we have an excellent idea about where 155 beautiful braless “Erins” will come from. [STAR TAGS: Erins Go Braless! Kylie Ireland St. Patrick’s Day Audio]

Kylie Ireland
3/15/14

Supposedly the middle of March happens to be a big threat because we should theoretically fear a dreamer? … Obviously things have changed between Shakespeare and Alexis Texas — Social Media being one of the foremost among them, it appears. Or would that be amongst them? It’s all very confusing. We should stick to naked women. Otherwise we thinks we doth protest too much. [STAR TAGS: Alexis Texas, Syren Sexton Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]

 

Alexis Texas All Atwitter About Something
3/11/14

One of the greatest things about college has to be that about this time every year, the mind starts turning to wonderful, sun-drenched, thoughts about Spring Break. Of course one of the greatest things about being out of college would be that you can take a break any time you want. Granted, you pretty much have to live off the grid, or have really rich relatives, a state that sadly does not define anyone we know. Still, we do get to work with Kristal Summers and Cytherea regularly, so as jobs go, we don’t really complain about this one very much. We will on occasion wonder, however: Where’s a good trust fund when you need one? [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers, Cytherea Video, Lauren Phoenix Video, Scarlet Red, Romance]

 

Ahoy, Matey!
3/5/14

Since yesterday everyone celebrated “Fat Tuesday” would it not make sense that we should call today “Skinny Wednesday” from now on? It sure sounds a lot more pleasant than Ash Wednesday, for example. Also, it makes a lot more sense to Get the Skinny on Dee & Anais Breaking Glad than it does to think about them all covered with ashes. Eeew. [STAR TAGS: Dee Exclusive Video, Anais Exclusive Video]

Dee
3/2/14

Consider us one big ol’ happy group of sexual philanthropists. Granted, it would seem pretty silly to imagine a big ol’ unhappy group of sexual philanthropists, so you might as well just go with the easy one. As a rule, we like that approach in life — and not just when it applies to our women. [STAR TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video]

Shayla LaVeaux Feeling Sexually Philanthropic
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September 2013 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

9/28/13

Makeup sex can be really great. We all know that, right? Of course getting to actually have sex by way of apology would probably be better than getting to merely watch sex, but even as technologically advanced as we are around here, we have not quite mastered the “transporter” option for the web site. We do, however, have Asia Carrera to help you along with whatever journey you (two or three or … ) choose to take. All in all, it’s probably for the best we cannot offer that “’in person” option. Asia would get really, really tired. [STAR TAGS: Asia Carrera Video]

Riding a Turbo Carrera
9/25/13

Maverick has a birthday today, although considering how these updates play “in history” so to speak, it may not technically be “today” when you read this. Consequently, should you ever have the inkling to wish Maverick a Happy Birthday, you just need to do so on September 25th. Mav happens to be a quite kind chap, and thus he celebrates his birthday on the same day every year. For our part, we try to memorialize this date the same way every year too: Kristal Summers. He seems to appreciate it. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers]

Kristal Summers
9/23/13

When a good friend suffers a loss — even if you happen to think it’s completely ridiculous, because it’s only a game, and your friend wasn’t even playing the game personally — you do what you can to remind them of happier times. So today, as a bunch of regular working people in Wisconsin feel lousy about a bunch of highly paid people in Wisconsin, we chose to remind Uncle Gibby about Exxxotica Chicago this year. Cheer up, dear friend: At least we didn’t send you boner pills. [STAR TAGS: Stormy Daniels, Alexis Texas, Kristina Rose, Britney Amber, Jayden Jaymes, Jayden Cole, Lexi Belle, Exxxotica Chicago Exclusive Video]

Lexi. We Love that Belle.
9/19/13

None of us has been willing to go on record regarding D.Minion’s organizational mania at the new office, but we will point out that we now have a label on a shelf that reads “Label Maker.” Of course being given DM’s persona in a regular work environment will allow others to think outside the box — as it were — regarding important things like how we might improve cheerleaders, and how we might please Gibby at least half the time, just like the 1-1 Green Bay Packers. [STAR TAGS: Anais Video, Jana Cova Video, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Michelle Michaels Video, Michael Ninn]

TWO Stunning Blondes
9/14/13

Well we survived another Friday the 13th again, although truth be told when the dude in charge goes by the name “Lucky” those tend to be sort of party days around here anyway. Of course the REAL truth be told, one could pretty much apply that description to pretty much any of our days. Although technically this update applies most directly to questions via the “Free Side” of risqué, we can’t really answer them without some of the uncensored aspects of the Membership Side, so we decided to throw a party to celebrate our cleverness. You’ll actually find us fairly shameless when it comes to party excuses, and we don’t even care that much about accuracy. [STAR TAGS: Dee Exclusive Video, Kylie Ireland Video]

Under Dee Water
9/11/13

Not many people give much thought to the term bittersweet anymore, but for the last dozen years, Americans have been able to put that term to September 11th. As a nation we’re certainly a lot stronger and safer than we were before that date, but the progress came at a terrible cost. Retrospect has a way of bringing up mixed emotions, which we can happily avoid simply by looking at Kaylan Nicole … and Cytherea … and Shayla LaVeaux. All things considered, life can be pretty good around here. Oddly enough, most of our memories are not too painful to remember. … [STAR TAGS: Kaylan Nicole Video, Shayla LaVeaux Audio, Cytherea]

A Beauty Within, as it were …
9/7/13

Have you heard the famous line, “Seven in One Blow!” somewhere along the line? Now it could refer to a particularly accurate fellow with a fly swatter. It could also be talking about an element in any number of gang bang movies. Of course now all the truly erudite will understand that the sentence refers to the opening game Peyton Manning had in the 2013 NFL season. Of course this only becomes important for the “non-erudite” when taken as an example of how sometimes people can interpret things in different ways. … It doesn’t make them wrong so much as … OK … It makes them wrong. [STAR TAGS: Anais, Jana Cova Video, Michael Ninn]

Nothing Wrong with Anais
9/5/13

Depending upon what day you happen to be looking at this, the date at the side here might be confusing. But worry not: today is in fact September 5th. You see D.Minion had carefully planned out her Intimate Encounters 3 coverage to hit on consecutive Denver Bronco games under the odd assumption that not all people care about such things. Sadly, D.Minion failed to comprehend the difference between preseason and the regular season in the NFL. Worry not, however. We fixed it. No matter what your calendar says, don’t panic. Of course “tomorrow” might be September 5th too, but soon it won’t matter in the slightest — well, except for the loser of the game … on September 5th. [STAR TAGS: Sophia Knight Exclusive Video, Breanne Benson Exclusive Video, Jeanie Marie Sullivan]

Sophia Knight
9/1/13

Kristal Summers has a birthday on this date. This one happens to be special, however, as after much research we have determined that it will be the only one in 2013, so that deserves a celebration. Of course only Maverick could decide that having Kristal dress up in a latex nurse outfit for him qualifies as a birthday celebration for her, but those Brits … . What’re ya gonna do? … At least Mav contributes to the cause with his “Nurse Sandie” U.K. version, and that helped. Next year, though, we’re all lobbying for Mav to bring Nurse Sandie TO Nurse Kristal. THAT sounds like a party. [STAR TAGS: Kristal Summers, Sandie Caine Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com]

Nurse of the Sandie Variety
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