5/30/11 | A great many things in life turn out to be memorable, and today (at least in America) we celebrate some of the most daring sacrifices in our history. We don’t as a rule wish misfortune, however severe, on any person, but the attack on our little benevolent site yesterday morning did manage to peeve us for a couple of hours. You may have noticed the “hacked” warnings if you tried to log on early in the day, which at least means the security settings are acting as programmed. It basically locks everything down so we can find the vermin and exterminate them, but that’s handy too. Having determined the cause of the problem, we will give them this bit of advice, should they be reading risque still: You should move. We know where you live. … On a much happier note, Shayla’s around once again and has helped us take our minds off of people that have nothing better to do than wreak random acts of digital violence. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux] |
5/27/11 | Have you ever run across the perfect word, long forgotten in the recesses of your brain, and then found yourself using it all the time over the course of a day? Well that happened to us today, which wouldn’t be that odd except the word happens to be “sycophant” – which really shouldn’t apply all that often one would think. On the other hand we admittedly lead weird lives around here, and we do tend to rather appreciate the efforts of a clever sycophant, so there you go. Maverick also puts forth some effort to pun the last name of Tanya Cox, but compared to the $10 word effort, that just seemed rather simplistic. Regardless of literary merit, however, we’re thinking you will probably like the Tanya video on 247AdultStars.com better anyway. You just can’t reason with some people. [FEATURED TAGS: Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com] |
5/26/11 | So who even knew the wind could blow 200 mph on dry land? Presumably some people alive enough to pay attention to tornados back in 1974 might remember, but none of us around here falls into that category. (Well, Gibby and Steve might, but we didn’t ask them out of politeness.) Still, they call it “Mother Nature” for a reason, and we all remember a few times in our lives when mama just felt a need to make her presence more keenly felt – at least before a “time out” became a presumably reasonable method of punishment. In a rather more pleasant vein today, though, we give you Brea Bennett, playing her own version of a woman requiring attention. Interestingly enough, this lesson doesn’t suck at all. [FEATURED TAGS: Brea Bennett Video, Jayme Langford Video, Michael Ninn] |
5/22/11 | Don’t you just hate it when you feel like a complete idiot? All this time we’ve been worried about the NFL Labor Dispute (with capital letters, don’t you know), and the whole time we could have been watching the new Lingerie Football League. OK. So the web site(s) are designed poorly, featuring a user interface baffling to even those of us that do this for a living. Worse, every time you land on a page, when it finally loads, a process that takes way too long (because of poor implementation to go along with the poor design), it will start making horribly loud sounds without you doing a thing. This has been the benchmark for “amateur” for at least the last ten years in web development, by the way. And don’t even get us started on the use of all caps in the meta tags. … Despite all that, though, the League features women playing tackle football in amazingly skimpy outfits. Tom Brady can now just keep on suing whomever he wants for as long as he wants. We’re happy. … Oh! And you can hear about Shayla LaVeaux playing with herself today too. We forgot to mention. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Brittany Andrews] |
5/19/11 | You can probably think of a great many ways to apologize, without ever admitting any culpability, of course, because otherwise where’s the skill in that? In our particular case, however, we’ll have to admit it becomes a heck of a lot easier if you have a bunch of Anais footage tucked away. You may have considered as you’ve gone through life, that very beautiful people just don’t seem to live under the same set of rules as the rest of us. Now we’re not arguing with that assessment at all, but we will say that it’s darned handy to have a few of them as friends every once in awhile. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Anais Video, Michael Ninn] |
5/17/11 | Speaking of “Capri” (and D.Minion does that today) … but strange shortish pants don’t encompass the bigger issue here. We need to set the stage a bit … So if you decide to hire a new secretary, and you decide to hire Cytherea for the job. And then if she decides to have sex in the office, you really should think about covering your computers in plastic or something. And if she decides to make that sex a 3-way, and you’re not invited to be one of the three, well, you should probably still get the plastic anyway – and maybe one of those shop vacuums that sucks up liquids too. That would be handy. And finally, you probably never, ever, want Cytherea and D.Minion to roam around the office when you’re not there. Hypothetically … [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Lylith LaVey] |
5/13/11 | Many, many types of smiles can play across a woman’s face, and if men spent more time looking at that part of the female anatomy, we might actually learn to recognize them. … That said, trying to understand women, and Friday the Thirteenth at the same time really seems like too much scariness at one time. Y’all (well, all the Members) can consider Office Darling Capri Anderson her beatific smiles. … Fun word, beatific … (Maybe the world needs more Tifics. You think?). [FEATURED TAGS: Capri Anderson Exclusive Video, Bree Olsen] |
5/9/11 | For some odd reason, the post for May 1st didn’t seem to go up until after the post for May 5th – and both of them apparently added a day to their intended debuts. While this sort of messes up the whole Cinco de Mayo celebration thing, it does in retrospect demonstrate a May Day! May Day! concept that we pretty much live by all year long. … If you haven’t visited in the last few days it shouldn’t matter, but if have stopped by already this past weekend, you might pop on back to May 2nd (now) and be sure you’re caught up. Actually once you read that particular entry, you can probably guess what happened too. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Raquel Devine] |
5/6/11 | Alfred Hitchcock once said, “There is nothing quite so good as burial at sea. It is simple, tidy, and not very incriminating.” … Given the events of this past week, that seems an oddly prescient view, don’t you think? … Fortunately for those of us not completely fixated on military spending all the time, we have a rather more enjoyable reason to use a couple of different Alfred Hitchcock quotes as D.Minion finishes up her on-the-set piece for Erica McLean’s Flying Pink Pig. If you think about it, this too can tie into more mainstream current events, as we can all be sure that this will be exactly when the government tells us the complete story about anything – when pigs fly. (All things considered, that’s probably a good thing, however.) [FEATURED TAGS: Sunny Lane, Nicki Hunter, Emy Reyes, Tessa Taylor, Megan Foxx, Exclusive Video, Erica McLean] |
5/2/11 | If you happen to be a male, and you happen to have ever been stuck in a store while a woman tried on a bunch of clothes, then you have a keen understanding of how difficult it can be to look absolutely nowhere at all, yet still keep your eyes open. On the other hand, if instead you happen to be at a shoot with a porn star while she tries on a bunch of different clothes, well, the experience differs dramatically. Basically, you just don’t feel like closing your eyes even for a moment. If all department stores employed porn stars, it would bring a whole level of enjoyment to that boring shopping exercise. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Kristal Summers Video] |
Filed Under: Anais
Risque Search | Changes in Latitudes, Similar Attitudes

December 2010 Risque | What’s New
… With appropriate credit to Garth:
Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff
12/31/10 | At this point we’ve pretty much given up on Business as Usual around here, as everyone has pretty much fallen into the Full Panic mode about the upcoming convention. When we decided to put that Countdown for Gibby on top of New Stuff, we didn’t really anticipate that this would result in common wails of AAAARGH! in the office – every time somebody here opens up the site to check something. Presuming we haven’t been overrun by a collection of pirates, one might assume that the old “Ignorance is Bliss” theory definitely seems to hold water in this establishment. Of course, since we’re almost always happy here, that should give us reason to worry, right? … We’ll think about that, and y’all enjoy Bullet Points from DM. [FEATURED TAGS: AEE 2010, Rayveness, Nicki Hunter, Christy Canyon, Raylene, Ginger Lynn, Veronica Hart, Jessica Drake, Monique Alexander, Eva Angelina, Julia Ann, Sasha Grey, Jesse Jane, Nina Hartley, Chloe, Sunset Thomas, Exclusive Video] |
12/27/10 | You know how it feels when you get the opportunity to hang out with a friend that you’ve had for going on 20 years? Well, that’s how we’ve been enjoying for the past few months as we’ve all been showing off what we can do for just such a friend, Shayla LaVeaux. Today happens to be Shayla’s birthday, and today also happens to mark the launch of Shayla’s brand new personal web site. Members here get that access for FREE, and all of Shayla’s members will also get to hang with the rest of us for the same price. We’ve had a saying around here that we’ve used for years: “Things tend to work out.” … Happy Birthday, pretty lady. We love you. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux] |
12/25/10 | Sometimes simple works best: Merry Christmas. [FEATURED TAGS: Merry Christmas!] |
12/24/10 | Don’t you just love presents? In the long list of quirks resulting in social deficiency that we possess around here, not being Politically Correct doesn’t even make the Top 40 list in all probability. Consequently, we feel quite comfortable just saying “Have a Holly, Jolly Christmas” and offering up another collection of gifts that you really shouldn’t share in just your basic family gathering. On the other hand, it does make us feel quite good to be able to offer this to the Members, and if that makes us odd, well, we weird people need love too. [FEATURED TAGS: Justine Joli, Anais, Georgia Adair, Jana Cova, Angel Cassidy, Charlie Lane, Jassie, Moni Michaels, Melissa Lauren, Audrey Hollander, Brittney Skye, Marie Luv, Daisy Marie, Heather Vuur, Heather Vandeven, Rita Faltoyano, Michael Ninn] |
12/22/10 | It’s … a Poetry, Nudity, Gala (Oh, My!) … And for what it’s worth, we’ve never heard tell of Cytherea actually appearing in a home having magically come down the chimney, but we can assure you that she’d be welcome most anywhere we suspect. At the very least she provides a lot of decorative value to the area, regardless of the season. And while we make no claim to Shakespearean aspirations around here, we can do a dandy bit with the Limerick. If you have the time to wander through, you might even enjoy the poetic license. If you just have time to gaze at Cytherea, you’ll definitely enjoy her license to thrill. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea] |
12/20/10 | Did you know that even porn stars can get jealous when “their” man participates in a scene? Well, strange as it may seem normal human emotions don’t completely abandon a woman just because she’s decided on this rather atypical career choice. On the other hand, even in the presence of these feelings the guy usually gets to escape with all his limbs intact – even if not so much his breath. … If any of you folks out there ever find yourself in this unusual situation, take some advice from someone who’s seen it a lot: Walk away clean, and whatever you do, don’t brag too much. Shayla LaVeaux, Olivia Del Rio, and Anthony demonstrate a point (or two) this time around. That’s handy. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Olivia Del Rio] |
12/17/10 | If you live long enough, you’ll get an opportunity to use the word “redact” in a sentence. Actually, if you happen to work for one of the various “critical” agencies for the U.S. Government, you’ll probably get to use that word all the time — generally in response to the bellows of all those pesky But The First Amendment is Important! people. On the upside, we use bellows a whole lot more than we use gallows these days, so that seems like progress. [FEATURED TAGS: Sunny Lane, Kimberly Kane, Evan Stone, Erica McLean, Kaz B. Exclusive Video, 247adultstars.com] |
12/13/10 | Think about “C’mon Baby Light My Fire” … And if you know anything at all about Cytherea’s “speciality” in her adult performances, you know that if she did in fact light your fire, she could at least put it out all by herself. If you don’t happen to know what we’re talking about with Cytherea, well, you certainly will after a careful perusal of today’s video example. If you don’t understand “C’mon Baby Light My Fire” at all, just check YouTube. You’ll figure it out. And once reaching the video clips, if you wonder why someone in our Video Department went to all the trouble to create the complicated blueprint graphics as the background for the little introductions, we can explain that easily here too. Upon questioning we learned that this resulted from the simple fact that “Cytherea wrote the blueprints on this type of scene.” In addition to Web Geeks, Video Dudes also think they’re funny. … On the upside, you’ll even understand the Classic 60’s song reference at the end of DM’s story too. It’s fun around here. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Video, Taylor Hayes Video] |
12/10/10 | Have you ever had a party with a bunch of porn stars and all of the sudden they all decided to pile on each other and pose for naked pictures? … OK. So probably not, but there are a great many worse ways to spend an evening in life. So we decided to look at a life of one of those stars today, and then illustrate her adorned with Devinn Lane, Kristal Summers, Dee, and Wendy Divine. That’s a heck of a good way to be adorned, just so you know. [FEATURED TAGS:Kristal Summers, Dee, Wendy Divine, Devinn Lane, Jessica Drake, Cheyenne Silver] |
12/7/10 | The more philosophically positive around here try to remember today for a different reason than history aficionados. Today, of course, happens to be Chasey Lain’s birthday. Naturally we have always wished the best for Chasey, and she’s (by all accounts, including her own) doing well. She’s actually talking about learning some web design techniques, which would make her a certainly entertaining person around the office. Consequently we’re doing some celebration of our own around here today, and giving a public vote of confidence for another lass that has had career hiccups – albeit those being of a substantially less physically risky than Chasey’s past. As D.Minion says, “We just want everyone to be happy.” [FEATURED TAGS: Capri Anderson, Chasey Lane Video, Isabella Video, Daisy Marie Video] |
12/2/10 | Each of us brings a unique perspective to life, well, unless you happen to be one of those lacky “Dear God, Don’t Let Me Lose My Job” types in Washington, D.C. of course. Of course gradations of “unique” come into play, and both D.Minion and Sunny Lane certainly represent Whos of Different Hues if you want to look at it that way. Put them both in a Las Vegas hotel room, and you can imagine where the conversation (to say the least) will go. Since we’ve now started serious planning for the upcoming Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas, this little soirée seemed the perfect beginning. One thing about Vegas with a boatload of porn stars, you can find soirées out the ying-yang. … There’s another title in there somewhere. [FEATURED TAGS: Sunny Lane Exclusive Video, Alexis Texas Exclusive Video, Veronica Hart] |
September 2010 Risque | What’s New
… With appropriate credit to Garth:
Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff
9/30/10 | You know how many modern cars have CD changers built into them these days, and most of those devices have six “slots” into which you may insert your various personal music selections? … Right. … So in one particular car this week we found the following options available to us: Mötly Crüe, Bobby Darin, Aretha Franklin, Ringo Starr, Human League, and The Black Crowes. Now you might expect someone with such diverse, and potentially eclectic (Let’s be honest.), music tastes to carry these “unusual” predilictions into her everyday day life, and Shayla LaVeaux certainly doesn’t disappoint today as she gives it “Ye Olde College Try” for our entertainment. Tied very closely to this wonderful revelation was D.Minion’s glee at discovering she could do this in boring old computer code: ♥ … . Simple pleasures, y’all. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux] |
9/27/10 | What if you make moccasins out of a water moccasin? Is that redundant? Well while our (significantly less than, truth be told) Illustrious Leader was off contemplating important issues such as this over the weekend, those less philosophically inclined were left behind to launch the proper celebration of Dear Maverick’s Birthday (as you can see below, actually). When His Pickiness returned, it seems that there were some very slight – hardly worth mentioning, really – variances between what happened and what was supposed to happen. Gee. Some people have no sense of humor about some things, like spending hours and hours working on a new video display method that we sort of … well … forgot. And then there was something about a whole bunch of pictures that sort of slipped through the cracks too. Oops. … Hey, if we didn’t have to spend so much time pondering the appropriate animal skins with which to make comfortable footwear, we’d have probably remembered. It’s better now, though. Whew. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers, Julia Ann] |
9/25/10 | Birthdays generally fall in the “happy occasion” category for most of us, and when Maverick has one we get to share his gift with everyone. What could be better than a Kristal Summers Cam Show Replay you may wonder? Well, a Cam Show that also featured the ever-lovely Julia Ann, of course. It seems Mav has a thing for blondes with large breasts, but we’re thinking that he may have plenty of friends out there that understand this fascination, even if they don’t share the level of his enthusiasm. True, Kristal was in one of her Brunette Phases this time, but somehow we think that her hair color won’t keep Dear Maverick from enjoying the show. … And we need to be nice to Mav: He has to live in the rain most of the time. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers Video, Julia Ann Video, Exclusive Video] |
9/19/10 | Apparently after yesterday’s editorial comments regarding beer consumption and professional duties, Maverick felt a need to define (and a little bit defend) a few British traditions. Now the “point – counterpoint” approach works fairly well in conversation, but in a written environment, when you don’t get to include the final words … well … not so much. On the upside (even for the U.K. folks out there), Georgia Adair illustrates today, so everyone can pretty much ignore the “weird” as Mav puts it. There’s a saying about a pot and a kettle, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Georgia Adair] |
9/18/10 | Peeking at partying porn stars makes for a decidedly happy day, and Maverick has once again provided us just such an opportunity. Now we can’t say with certainty that the fact that these happen to be U.K. porn stars makes it even more fun, but it sure seems to. Maybe we just like seeing different women flashing and playing than the ones we usually see. Come to think of it, this might validate Ron White’s comment (that we tend to quote a lot around here, truth be told): “Once you’ve seen one woman naked, you pretty much want to see them all.” [FEATURED TAGS: AdultStars247.com, Anais, Crystal Pink, Michelle Moist, Holly D, Shay Hendrix, Loz Lorrimar, Syren Sexton, Tyler, Tiffany Doll, Kerry Louise, Sarah Jane, Tanya Cox, Exclusive Video] |
9/13/10 | Once again we’ve evidence of how unnecessarily complicated women can be. The current issue of Glamour magazine lists on its cover a (presumably) insightful article claiming “Ten Ways to Get What You Really Want in Bed” – which sounds nice, but has nine too many options it sounds like to us. A men’s magazine would say simply: “How Do You Get What You Really Want in Bed? Pay for It.” … See? … Sometimes perspective can make all the difference, and if D.Minion’s coverage of Exxxotica LA this summer teaches us nothing else, it should teach us that. On the other hand, any excuse for scantily-clad ladies always makes us happy – even the overly complicated women around here. [FEATURED TAGS: Exxxotica LA, Cytherea, Sunny Lane, Sophia Lynn, Joanna Angel, Exclusive Video] |
9/10/10 | We’re bringing in a little Brando today. OK. So technically we’re just bringing in the name, but we use it in the context of a really famous movie. Honestly, though, the movie actually sprung from an even more famous book, at least if you’re the type of person who reads. And if you’re not the type of person who reads, well, we’re not sure what you’re doing here quite honestly, but welcome anyway. If it makes you feel any better, you’ll have a lot of fun just looking at the “BTS Adornment” provided by Cytherea. You can just ignore all the words. That’s what most of the people that actually work here do, truth be told. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea] |
9/8/10 | Continuing our traditional celebration of really funny t-shirts, we saw one at a ridiculously fancy store in L.A. this week that said, “It’s not all about winning or losing. Well, OK. Yeah, it is.” Of course a philosophy such as this comes fairly easily in a retail establishment where some of the shoes cost more than the first car most of us had growing up. Speaking of growing up, apparently those short-legged pants have made a comeback – or maybe they never left. We tried to get the details but oddly enough the sales people at the fancy place didn’t seem all that interested in providing fashion history to someone wearing a 20-yr-old Denver Broncos t-shirt. Go figure. … And what does all of this have to do with Capri Anderson? … Thankfully very little. We’d warn you about the Mary Tyler Moore references today, but that would spoil all the fun, now wouldn’t it? [FEATURED TAGS: Capri Anderson] |
9/2/10 | No one can be quite certain why all of the sudden quotes from The Great Gatsby keep coming across the posting desk, but apparently someone has started college again and has found themselves in an American Lit class. That said, the following does indeed have some bearing on today’s introspection, albeit more in the addendum than in the information proper. “Americans, while occasionally willing to be serfs, have always been obstinate about being peasantry.” … And if you don’t understand (or don’t care) about the expatriate Mr. Fitzgerald, well, just look at the conclusion of the Cytherea having fun being a voyeur story. We all get to pick our own drummer. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea] |