3/30/12 | Freeways in Los Angeles can be quite entertaining places — at least if you’re the type to let traffic bother you very much. We got behind one of those tricked out SUV’s this week, the kind where the guy makes up for what he lacks in testicles with the tire size on his truck. You’ve seen them. … Well, this one had a license plate that said, “NVRGLTY” leading us to the conclusion that the owner was either a criminal defense attorney, or a six-year-old bully — not that those two psychological states differ all that much really. Still it did make us wonder about how occasionally looks can in fact be deceiving, much as the case with Nick Manning’s photography today. Of course the fact that Nick chose Dee as his subject helps a lot. People can get away with many things if they illustrate with Dee naked, after all. [FEATURED TAGS: Dee, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Jenna Haze Video, Michael Ninn] |
3/27/12 | The original plan for today centered around a wildly entertaining display of a bunch of scantily-clad women frolicking in a rain-soaked park. We planned on a vast amount of prose surrounding these compelling images, sufficient to secure our position as one of the web’s top Meandering Professionals. Sadly, we have no such pictures, so our wonderfully clever title of “Hello mudder. Hello Fodder.” will thus go unused. We do have a fascinating discussion of Shayla’s views on winning awards in porn, however, and have potentially found some equally interesting — although freshly showered — illustrations. [FEATURED TAGS: Bobbi Star Video, Jenna Haze Video] |
3/24/12 | Of “Cats, Tats, & Fantasy Begats” tells the tale this time around, although we do attempt to clarify that theme just a bit. Now if you have been a member for much time at all, you might be more than a bit dubious regarding our clarification skills, a stance really that we’d have a hard time arguing with, sadly enough. We do have fun, though, and how many people can say that about their lives every day? [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Alexandra Silk, Carmen Luvana] |
3/20/12 | What we lack in eloquence we more than make up for with verve. Should you choose to read the technical trifle over on CythereasWetWorld today, you will understand precisely what we mean by that too. You may not agree with the statement, but you will at least understand it. … Feel free to disagree with us, actually. People often do. … Silly, people. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video] |
3/17/12 | Top o’ the mornin’ to ya. … Pip. Pip. … Cheerio. … Well, that’s a sticky wicket, wat? … To we self-absorbed Americans, most foreign expressions said with an accent that sound kinda-sorta like the Beatles must mean it’s British. Of course most Americans would probably have a hard time pointing out Ireland on the globe, but hopefully they could at least get Australia right — even if they do think Crocodile Dundee sounds like he’s from London. Fortunately on this lovely holiday, we ignore all the foolish American tendencies and leap right into the leprechaun spirit with our annual mammalian — so to speak — salute: “Erin Go Braless!” … In case you’re curious, this has less to do with having hair on our bodies or being born alive than it does that whole breast feeding thing. We never quite grow out of that fascination, you know. [FEATURED TAGS: Juli Ashton] |
3/15/12 | Continuing to let the Fates guide our digital meandering, we somehow find ourselves adapting the theories of Albert Einstein today. OK. So they’re not any of the scientific theories, because honestly those seem really, really hard, but we figure we can debate philosophy with anyone — particularly if they’re dead. Michael Ninn happens to be alive and celebrating another birthday today, so rather than cerebral rumination with him, rather we have decided to consider the metaphysical ramifications of Jenna Haze. All in all, this did not turn out to be a tough decision. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video, Jenna Haze Video, Michael Ninn] |
3/13/12 | The power of words tends to hold a rarified significance around here, as any Member could tell you certainly. As Maverick takes 247AdultStars further into the modern world with his porn star interview system, we take the opportunity to consider old-fashioned newspaper publication versus the contemporary digital approach. Bottom line: You have to be more careful if your company uses actual ink to deliver its message. To quote Ann Landers, “The trouble with talking too fast is you may say something you haven’t thought of yet.” … And we’d venture to say that not many adult web sites quote Ann Landers, actually. … Yet that remains only a small part of what makes us odd. [FEATURED TAGS: Kelly Hart, 247AdultStars] |
3/9/12 | Did you know that “laser” actually happens to be an acronym for “light amplification by simulated emission of radiation”? Well, if you had read the excellent biography on Einstein by Walter Isaacson you could have learned this. Of course, having said that, you could now also learn this same thing here at risque.com — and have the benefit of enjoying the lives of beautiful women that make their livings au naturel. For example, now you can learn about how a self-proclaimed “cheesehead” approaches a Feature Dance booking with Shayla LaVeaux. … Sorry, Walter: You just can’t compete with Shayla naked. We love your books, though, if that helps. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux] |
3/5/12 | Invoking the Deities today we further contribute to the science of modern friendship by visualizing a new method of keeping one’s furniture clean. OK. So technically we’re just sending Maverick best wishes on his next shoot and watching Cytherea on the next kitchen table in her squirting quest, but grandiose explanations tend to abound here, truth be told. On our way to a shoot last week we ended up behind a car with a bumper sticker that read, “Slay the Dragon of Ignorance.” A voice from the back seat quipped, “Well, we would, but we don’t know where it is.” … And that pretty much sums up the“aRB” view of life certainly. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Video, Tiana Lynn Video, Natalia Forrest, 247AdultStars.com] |
3/2/12 | Consider Kristal Summers Consciously Artified if you will. And if you have been around here much at all, you will know that we have as a rule no problem at all simply making up words to suit our purpose. Granted, the only suits worn around here tend to be of the birthday variety, but that does not mean we lack respect for those poor lost souls who must familiarize themselves with the intricacies of the “double windsor” all too often in their everyday lives. … No-No! … Truth be told, we try not to think about those people at all. They sort of give us the willies. Interestingly enough, so does Kristal, but for an entirely different reason. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers Video] |
Filed Under: Cytherea
February 2012 Risque | What’s New
… With appropriate credit to Garth:
Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff
1/30/12 | Years ago now, our dear friend SteveH decided to move back to his home town of Bumfuck, Missouri to chase some woman — although we cannot swear to this being the exact name of the town, honestly. Still, it did give us a chance to finally stop using “SteveD” to indicate the Other Steve in the office, as we progressed quickly through “Just Steve” to simply “Steve” when we refered to him. … And then the Original Steve decided to come out and visit us for the show this year, creating the Steve Confusion all over again. On the other hand, it did give all of us the chance to talk about “that woman” whom Original Steve eventually caught out in Missouri. Then we got to oft repeat one of our favorite adages: “Be careful what you wish for … .” What are friends for, after all? As for the New Steve, who became Just Steve after the Old, Original Steve left, well, his timing continued to be less than he might have hoped as you shall see. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video] |
1/26/11 | We recently learned from The Big Bang that you call a person that studies flags a vexillologist. This of course would not be the same “Big Bang Theory” that arrived to all of us courtesy of Georges Lemaître, but all in all the television series is a whole lot funnier. We can see how Fundamentalist Christians might be offended by both, however. Of course neither of these things have anything whatsoever to do with Becca, or Kristal Summers, or Kira, or Wendy … but we did want to mention them, because honestly how often do you see an adult web site admitting they understand anything at all about Fundamentalist Christians? [FEATURED TAGS: Juli Ashton Video, Kristal Summers Video, Wendy Divine Video, Becca Video, Cytherea, Kira Reed] |
1/16/12 | Some people would argue that a “business” should not even exist that essentially bases its success on naked people. Apparently when these folks left the Garden of Eden they quickly bid it, “Good Riddance!” and took off with a whole tree’s worth of fig leaves for themselves. Of course some people also believe that if “their team” fumbled the ball at an inopportune time over the weekend, the world might indeed end — or at least be no better than a really depressing place for a few months. … You just can’t please some people. What can you do? … Well in our case, on the eve of our annual trek to the AEE in Vegas, we decided this year to take a moment to reflect upon the upstart in the industry, this of course being XBIZ. At first glance, the new approach seems quite a bit different from the older one, but then AVN has an entirely new plan this year as well, so we will see. If nothing else, we have learned to laugh — an important lesson in life. [FEATURED TAGS: XBIZ LA Convention, Brittney Skye Video] |
1/15/12 | Unless you happen to be a fan of one of the four teams that will remain in the championship race in the NFL after today, you might find a common thought running through your brain incessantly: What to do? What to do? … Of course a very slim chance exists that you happen to be one of those people that does not follow professional football, but worry not about that: We still have that Fifth Amendment thing, and no one can make you admit that. More significant this time around would be Tenaya’s contributions to our traditionally “uncommon thoughts” on life in the XXX Business. Now “valuable” one could argue, but “uncommon” seems self-evident. Tenaya, and Shayla, and Capri? Obviously, they would all be both. [FEATURED TAGS: Tenaya, Misty Rivers, Capri Anderson Video, Shayla LaVeaux, Bianca Video, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com] |
1/11/12 | One of the best things about attending the annual AVN convention in Las Vegas has to be that you get a chance to see a lot of friends in the business that you may not have run across on set in a few months. Given that this year’s event has all the indications of being a massive … well, we won’t say because we happen to like the AVN people a lot — but think “massive amounts of copulation in a tightly bunched group” — we plan on having a lot to talk about with them as we all sit around waiting for the organization to catch up with us. All in all, we’re going to have a good time regardless, and honestly the regular conversations with Jenna Haze always rank highly on our good memories list. Speaking of Jenna and good memories, we have a few with D.Minion — and surprisingly few dogs, truth be told. [FEATURED TAGS: Jenna Haze Exclusive Video, Kortney Kane Exclusive Video] |
1/7/12 | Travel looms. Technically, loads and loads of travel looms. … What with XBIZ being on the schedule for the first time this year, and AVN deciding that they don’t need all those pesky CES attendees to fill up its convention halls, we will find ourselves living out of suitcases more often than not over the next couple of weeks. Naturally that got us to thinking about earlier times when this has come to pass in our world, and you know what? Come to find out, sometimes it really isn’t all that bad. Porn stars tend to be entertaining travel-mates as it turns out, even if there will likely be not near as much mating as one might hope. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Dee, Inari Vachs, Devinn Lane] |
1/3/12 | If you rap about a wrap party, is that redundant? What if they play rap music? Worse yet, what if the party involves absolutely no nudity, even though Julia Ann and Inari Vachs are there and so you “rip” it? Well, a wrap party by definition marks the end of something, and in that case R.I.P. would be perfectly in order, right, even if you happen not to be disappointed at all? Who knew what chaos could spring from words with just three little letters? … Hey, you should see what we can do with Cytherea and some of those $10 words. We have been waiting literally years and years for the perfect opportunity to roll out supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. “Fantastic” huh? [FEATURED TAGS: Julia Ann, Inari Vachs, Cytherea] |
1/1/12 | Ringing in the New Year always brings a lot of joy around here. And doing so with Shayla LaVeaux and Kristal Summers (sadly separately this time) adds a predictable enhancement to the experience. All in all the first of the year invariably brings even more chaos to our existence than even we generally experience. That said, you really can’t complain too much if the bedlam in your life involves a plethora of naked women. If it occasionally involves beds too, well, you get the picture … [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers, Shayla LaVeaux Video] |
January 2012 Risque | What’s New
… With appropriate credit to Garth:
Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff
1/30/12 | Years ago now, our dear friend SteveH decided to move back to his home town of Bumfuck, Missouri to chase some woman — although we cannot swear to this being the exact name of the town, honestly. Still, it did give us a chance to finally stop using “SteveD” to indicate the Other Steve in the office, as we progressed quickly through “Just Steve” to simply “Steve” when we refered to him. … And then the Original Steve decided to come out and visit us for the show this year, creating the Steve Confusion all over again. On the other hand, it did give all of us the chance to talk about “that woman” whom Original Steve eventually caught out in Missouri. Then we got to oft repeat one of our favorite adages: “Be careful what you wish for … .” What are friends for, after all? As for the New Steve, who became Just Steve after the Old, Original Steve left, well, his timing continued to be less than he might have hoped as you shall see. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video] |
1/26/11 | We recently learned from The Big Bang that you call a person that studies flags a vexillologist. This of course would not be the same “Big Bang Theory” that arrived to all of us courtesy of Georges Lemaître, but all in all the television series is a whole lot funnier. We can see how Fundamentalist Christians might be offended by both, however. Of course neither of these things have anything whatsoever to do with Becca, or Kristal Summers, or Kira, or Wendy … but we did want to mention them, because honestly how often do you see an adult web site admitting they understand anything at all about Fundamentalist Christians? [FEATURED TAGS: Juli Ashton Video, Kristal Summers Video, Wendy Divine Video, Becca Video, Cytherea, Kira Reed] |
1/16/12 | Some people would argue that a “business” should not even exist that essentially bases its success on naked people. Apparently when these folks left the Garden of Eden they quickly bid it, “Good Riddance!” and took off with a whole tree’s worth of fig leaves for themselves. Of course some people also believe that if “their team” fumbled the ball at an inopportune time over the weekend, the world might indeed end — or at least be no better than a really depressing place for a few months. … You just can’t please some people. What can you do? … Well in our case, on the eve of our annual trek to the AEE in Vegas, we decided this year to take a moment to reflect upon the upstart in the industry, this of course being XBIZ. At first glance, the new approach seems quite a bit different from the older one, but then AVN has an entirely new plan this year as well, so we will see. If nothing else, we have learned to laugh — an important lesson in life. [FEATURED TAGS: XBIZ LA Convention, Brittney Skye Video] |
1/15/12 | Unless you happen to be a fan of one of the four teams that will remain in the championship race in the NFL after today, you might find a common thought running through your brain incessantly: What to do? What to do? … Of course a very slim chance exists that you happen to be one of those people that does not follow professional football, but worry not about that: We still have that Fifth Amendment thing, and no one can make you admit that. More significant this time around would be Tenaya’s contributions to our traditionally “uncommon thoughts” on life in the XXX Business. Now “valuable” one could argue, but “uncommon” seems self-evident. Tenaya, and Shayla, and Capri? Obviously, they would all be both. [FEATURED TAGS: Tenaya, Misty Rivers, Capri Anderson Video, Shayla LaVeaux, Bianca Video, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com] |
1/11/12 | One of the best things about attending the annual AVN convention in Las Vegas has to be that you get a chance to see a lot of friends in the business that you may not have run across on set in a few months. Given that this year’s event has all the indications of being a massive … well, we won’t say because we happen to like the AVN people a lot — but think “massive amounts of copulation in a tightly bunched group” — we plan on having a lot to talk about with them as we all sit around waiting for the organization to catch up with us. All in all, we’re going to have a good time regardless, and honestly the regular conversations with Jenna Haze always rank highly on our good memories list. Speaking of Jenna and good memories, we have a few with D.Minion — and surprisingly few dogs, truth be told. [FEATURED TAGS: Jenna Haze Exclusive Video, Kortney Kane Exclusive Video] |
1/7/12 | Travel looms. Technically, loads and loads of travel looms. … What with XBIZ being on the schedule for the first time this year, and AVN deciding that they don’t need all those pesky CES attendees to fill up its convention halls, we will find ourselves living out of suitcases more often than not over the next couple of weeks. Naturally that got us to thinking about earlier times when this has come to pass in our world, and you know what? Come to find out, sometimes it really isn’t all that bad. Porn stars tend to be entertaining travel-mates as it turns out, even if there will likely be not near as much mating as one might hope. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Dee, Inari Vachs, Devinn Lane] |
1/3/12 | If you rap about a wrap party, is that redundant? What if they play rap music? Worse yet, what if the party involves absolutely no nudity, even though Julia Ann and Inari Vachs are there and so you “rip” it? Well, a wrap party by definition marks the end of something, and in that case R.I.P. would be perfectly in order, right, even if you happen not to be disappointed at all? Who knew what chaos could spring from words with just three little letters? … Hey, you should see what we can do with Cytherea and some of those $10 words. We have been waiting literally years and years for the perfect opportunity to roll out supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. “Fantastic” huh? [FEATURED TAGS: Julia Ann, Inari Vachs, Cytherea] |
1/1/12 | Ringing in the New Year always brings a lot of joy around here. And doing so with Shayla LaVeaux and Kristal Summers (sadly separately this time) adds a predictable enhancement to the experience. All in all the first of the year invariably brings even more chaos to our existence than even we generally experience. That said, you really can’t complain too much if the bedlam in your life involves a plethora of naked women. If it occasionally involves beds too, well, you get the picture … [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers, Shayla LaVeaux Video] |
December 2011 Risque | What’s New
… With appropriate credit to Garth:
Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff
12/31/11 | As near as we can tell, today happens to be New Year’s eve, and most places around the world happen to celebrate the new year with substantially more vigor and glee than they do any of those gift-giving holidays. Of course the vast majority of the world has at least a culture, but often an entire political system, that stems in no small degree from religious persecution, so maybe that makes sense. After all, it seems very wise to focus more on a day of the year you won’t get shot for celebrating, right? For our part, we have decided to stick to our roots as well. What they lack in historic violence and upheaval, they more than make up for in fun and nudity. This doesn’t set the bar very high, we understand, but as a rule we tend to prefer simple goals. (You members may have noticed.) And if D.Minion happens to discover our camouflaged secret, well, we plan on employing the exact same New Year’s Resolution we enjoy every year: Blame Maverick for everything. [FEATURED TAGS: Georgia Adair Video] |
12/27/11 | People do sometimes contribute to their own “Birthday Party” as Shayla has decided to do so today. True to at least our form, she chose to celebrate “Holliday” over the Holidays, and offers up some insights as to what it’s like being in the middle of 30 or 40 women all having sex together. Sadly, none of us here can really comment on this experience first-hand, but we do have a great many folks willing to learn. We value education, after all. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video, Kylie Ireland Video, Serenity Video, Juli Ashton Video, Nina Hartley Video, Shawna Lenee] |
12/25/11 | So did you sleep with thoughts of Sugar-Plums dancing through your head? Have you ever done that in your whole life? Would you even know a Sugar-Plum if it jumped out of the closet and bit you? And when is the last time you heard anyone exclaim, “My! What a clatter!” anyway? The fact that people around here spend time pondering such weighty issues serves as the only excuse I can think of for this Merry Christmas … um … Members’ Card. I worry about us sometimes. I really do. [FEATURED TAGS: Merry Christmas!] |
12/24/11 | You may not find it intuitive, but the adult movie industry happens to display a great deal of holiday cheer among its members. Of course you can’t really have a properly caroling environment without Ebenezer Scrooge, and thus we speak today with sincere affection for our friend Gregory Dark. True, we have chosen to do so with the able assistance of Juli Ashton, Kelly O’Dell, Felecia, and Serenity, but in our defense we claimed to be festive — not foolish. Why listen to some old fat guy that’s not planning on dropping down any chimneys tonight when you fill your silent nights with young ladies clearly coming about midnight? … There are way too many seasonal songs to consider. We’d best stop now. [FEATURED TAGS: Juli Ashton Video, Kelly O’Dell Video, Felecia Video, Serenity Video] |
12/21/11 | This is the time of year where we all get a little nostalgic; we all feel a little more optimistic, a little more peaceful. Benevolent tendencies, long hidden throughout the year, come closer to the surface, and we allow ourselves to pause a few more times during the day, just to feel a part of Mother Earth. … Or if you happen to be like us, you praise Rednecks everywhere, and wonder why everyone doesn’t celebrate the way we do. You forgive them, however, because let’s face it: If you go around saying everything you really think, no one is ever going to give you a gift — at least not one you’ll want to receive. [FEATURED TAGS: Anais, Georgia Adair, Angel Cassidy, Wanda Curtis, Michael Ninn, Bree Olsen Video, Sunny Leone Video] |
12/19/11 | We all know ‘Tis the Season of Giving, but let’s be honest, it’s pretty fun to get new things too. And with any luck they won’t be the sorts of things that will live in a closet until next year when we can give them again. In a typically benevolent re-gifting game, then, we have decided to offer up some holiday gift suggestions before we shuttle everyone off to enjoy Cytherea playing fauna amongst the flora. D.Minion “naturally” adds her special touch, although DM can be a lot like a gift from a distant relative: You honestly appreciate it, but you’re just not quite sure how to explain it to anyone. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video] |
12/15/11 | Rarely do we link directly to 247AdultStars.com — preferring rather to heighten anticipation, sweeten the experience, and generally make it more pleasantly pithy. … It’s either that or we pretty much like any excuse to show off more naked women. Theories may vary. All of this goes by the wayside this season, however, as Dear Maverick, being from London and thus used to a depressing Christmas season until the very last minute, has seen fit to visit a few ghosts on a couple of Brit Porn Stars and convince them to film a special holiday greeting for the members. You know what? … God Bless Us, Every One … [FEATURED TAGS: Anna Joy Exclusive Video, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com] |
12/10/11 | Contrary to D.Minion’s contention in the office, after making egg nog, they do not in fact use the rest of the animal to create Naugahyde seat covers. We try to be helpful with our insights here, just so no one gets confused as they go through life. You might consider, then, taking D.Minion’s view of Day Two of Ninn Worx’ House of Jordan shoot with a grain of salt — if not an entire spice rack. None of this detracts, however, from the 241 stellar photographs. … And how do we know these to be stellar photographs? Why all these women are stars, of course. [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Jordan, Alexis Love, Tiffany Sweet, Carli Banks, Michael Ninn] |
12/7/11 | You know those kind of “entertainment” things where folks get really sort of devious and sneak in little bits and pieces that presumably will teach us something? Sure, they couch it all in some general “Oh, my goodness, but this is a lot of fun!” sort of way, but it always sort of sounds like Tom Sawyer and that fence painting job? … You will be happy to know that for our part we are simply celebrating Chasey Lain’s birthday today, and if anyone learns anything, well, dang that ain’t our fault. How can porno be educational anyway? [FEATURED TAGS: Chasey Lain, Alexis DeVell, Shayla LaVeaux, Kaylan Nicole, Jewel, Emma Nixon] |
12/4/11 | We’ve heard a horrible rumor that some places out there have to deal with this bizarre phenomenon called “snow” — which basically sounds like a euphemism for “frozen water that can make life hell” if you want to know the truth. Having seen pictures of it on the news, we can tell you: It looks icky. We did want you to know, however, that we do have how own version of Snow out here, though, although admittedly ours happens to be of the “Aurora Snow” variety. … So you know what we call our Northern Lights? … Yep! … Aurora Areolas. (Sorry. We blame the cold — wherever it may be.) [FEATURED TAGS: Aurora Snow, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Phoenix Ray, Jessica Drake] |
12/1/11 | Anyone can do an interview, but very, very few people can do a “Ninnterview” as you’ll see easily. Also, anyone can crash a wedding, but only Cytherea can do it … well … like Cytherea does. And if these two quick introductions don’t make you want to see what’s on tap for today, then perhaps you should make an appointment with your family physician. You don’t feel well. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Brea Bennett Video, Jana Jordan Video, Renee Perez Video, Cassidey Video, Nikki Kane Video, Jennifer Dark, Alexis Love, Michael Ninn] |