Filed Under: Monica Mayhem

October 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

10/31/11	Remember when the “Little Monsters” visiting us this evening just meant there were a bunch of small people in costume going door to door obtaining free candy under threat of dirty deeds? Now, according to some of the … let’s go with less aged … among our office staff, a “Little Monster” might mean simply that the individual in question happens to be a fan of Lady Gaga. When did that happen? We missed the memo. … If you want to have some fun tonight, when the beggars come ringing your doorbell with their already sugar-filled bags thrust forward, choose “Trick!” and see what happens. If you can’t educate the young, what fun is life anyway? … Of course if you’d rather have an altogether different kind of fun tonight, just give ’em the candy so you can get back to our “Gothic Cheerleader” courtesy of Cytherea. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video]
10/29/11	No one here will admit responsibility for the apparent “poetry bug” that has bitten the writers around here, but as is our custom, we have made it quite easy to just skip to the … let’s go with more visual … presentations. After all, while it may take some education to adequately consider Shakespeare, it hardly takes a college degree to see the benefits of Shayla LaVeaux and Olivia Del Rio “virtually” … let’s go with working. Come to think of it, let’s just go … . [FEATURED TAGS: Eddie Van Halen, Jassie, Heather Vurr, Heather Vandeven, Monica Mayhem, Michael Ninn, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Olivia Del Rio Video ]
10/26/11	Certainly most of us would come to the aid of a Damsel in Distress — at least one would hope. Yet what percentage of us would take the time to explain Distress in Damsels when at the end of the written explanation comes Monique Alexander and Tori Black? … See? Don’t you just hate those philosophical puzzles? … Fortunately there will be no test today. Truthfully you don’t even need to pay attention to all the pesky words in the way of the beautiful women (although please don’t tell the copywriters because they’re very sensitive). And since we are being honest, we should mention that we find it pretty hard to imagine either Monique or Tori being in “distress” for very long. Right? [FEATURED TAGS: Monique Alexander Video, Tori Black Video, Michael Ninn]
10/23/11	Apparently “blonds have more fun” as they go through life. Assuming that true, then Jaclyn Smith (followed recently by Minka Kelly) would be much more alluring would they only dye their hair, right? Uh-huh. Have we mentioned the beautiful ocean-front property just outside of Denver we’re trying to sell? … Well, we don’t often get the chance to talk about one woman with experience in both “lifestyles” in adult movies, but when we do, we jump at the chance. OK. So that fact that A.J. Bailey happens to be brilliant too doesn’t hurt anything. Hey, when she gets old, she’ll still be smart. [FEATURED TAGS: AJ Bailey Video, Capri Anderson Video, Helmetcam Audio, Michael Ninn]
10/22/11	Theoretically, taking “the road less travelled” will make all the difference. Of course, have you ever noticed that no one ever mentions whether or not that difference will turn out to be a good thing? Life comes down to a matter of defining your perspective and then setting priorities; it’s really not any more complicated than that. For our part, we always seem to choose the path filled with naked women. They’re probably more philosophical or something. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Dee Video, Georgia Adair Video, Tasha Reign, Sarah Vandella, Kagney Linn Karter, Alexis Texas, Michael Ninn]
10/18/11	So a Haiku, a Fairy Tale, and a Limerick walk into a web site … No, really. … That’s what actually happens today. … We can’t really say “why” necessarily, because that would involve trying to understand D.Minion’s rationale, and we can assure you: Down that road disaster lies. … On a more — let’s go with typically sane — route, we do at least get to show off Shayla cavorting in our small town on California’s Central Coast. Better yet, Shayla has chosen to do so with a distinct lack of clothing for the most part, although she does seem to take advantage of batteries purchased locally. We’ve even thrown in some of those fancy “movin’ pictures” displaying a similar sort of cavorting, even though the scene has nothing technically to do with the poems. Internally we’ve entitled this bit of fun “The Lingerie Toss and Other Tales” but you may be more interested in the “Pure Gold Pussy” once all is said and done. Basically we know what we’ve done, but we have no idea what DM has said. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video]
10/16/11	All things considered, we have a pretty good life around here. Granted the abundance of beautiful naked women around does tend to slant the playing field in our favor, but we have deeply spiritual — metaphysically philosophical, even — reasons to be grateful for our lot in life. Well, at least we plan on having those, just as soon as the beautiful naked women stop working as sole justification. Hey, without a plan, how can you tell when you’ve fallen horribly short? … And the plan for today? Georgia Adair and Dee, beautiful and naked as you likely expected. Honestly, adding enough deeply spiritual and metaphysical philosophy, it adds a whole new interpretation to the concept of the NFL “bye” week. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Dee Video, Georgia Adair Video, Michael Ninn]
10/10/11	Columbus Day seemed like the perfect opportunity to talk about the potential benefits of exploration, particularly as they may pertain to Cytherea. Truth be told, we cannot be 100% sure what exactly we will “discover” on our trek, but we remain optimistic. According to Mr. Orwell, should we strive to be admirable writers, we need “let the meaning choose the word, and not the other way about.” As to the effectiveness of our efforts today, we shall let the members decide. … And just a bit of advice for members and non-members alike: Remember what we have learned from Mr. Columbus. Be really careful if you’re screwing the Queen. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Jana Jordan Video, Alana Langford Video, Michael Ninn]
10/7/11	For a long time now, we’ve been planning to celebrate the release of the next Michael Ninn movie we can talk about and show off with the last Michael Ninn movies (we could talk about and show off) — these happening right before new Ninn Worx management felt “uncomfortable” with our presence. Consequently, on the precipice of some very select customers in the U.S. being able to obtain a copy of Michael’s The Four, we bring you for the first time D.Minion’s observations of the first day of House of Jordan. We’ve entitled this episode “Who Let the Dogs Out?” — which will make a lot more sense once you read it. … OK. So that may not be entirely true. … It will make as much sense as we usually make. There. [FEATURED TAGS: Jana Jordan, Renee Perez, Lena Nicole, Marlie Moore, Alana Langford, Michael Ninn]
10/2/11	Sigh. The plan was to put this up on Sunday night … and then … depression set in. On the stripes of the gridiron the only thing that makes the Colorado professional football team better than Colorado’s biggest college football team is that the college team has played one more game, thus recording one more loss. Many might assume that being from a state even colder than Colorado, say, Wisconsin, would be a fine reason for depression of an entirely more aggregate view. But you if you happen to be a football fan, Wisconsin’s not a bad place to be. … Still, we’re trying to cope the way we do. Too bad Uncle Gibby’s not allowed to look at the video here. He would have liked it — a lot. [FEATURED TAGS: Lexi Belle, Monique Alexander, Anais Video, Michael Ninn]

November 2010 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

11/30/10	If you’ve followed Shayla LaVeaux’s career at all, you’ll know that she basically lives as a woman combining Colorado with Southern California. And if you’ve followed Shayla’s new personal web site evolution at all, you’ll know that she now features these aspects of her personality. (Of course following the evolution of Shayla’s new personal web site would be pretty hard, since we haven’t launched it yet, but that’s just a detail.) Well, today’s Shayla feature aptly demonstrates this new approach, and it will quite likely provide you with some insight as to how cowgirls should dress for their performances. That said, we’re thinking the National Professional Rodeo Association might have bit of difficulty getting this new standard approved, and that’s too bad really. Life can be hard. … In Shayla’s case, of course, that clearly constitutes a very good thing. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux Video]
11/27/10	Dedicated to keeping the long holiday weekend extra special this year, you’ll find “Dee Perfect” – dare we say “Kristal Clear” – bit of home-spun nudity on tap today. True, at some level all nudity would be home-spun, but if you’re really trying to be that literal around here, you should probably be reading something a little deeper than your typical Risqué Commune offering. … And go volunteer at a soup kitchen or something. That’s doing more to help the world than hanging around here too. Still, we do make for a pleasant diversion. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers, Dee Video, Exclusive Video]
11/25/10	You’ve probably heard of a lot of wonderful ways to give thanks today, and maybe even some of those don’t involve gluttony or football, although “a lot” might be a stretch in that case. However, we’re pretty sure that peeking at Cytherea risking her life just for fun has got to rank right up there with the best potential celebrations today. In honor of Cytherea and her larger than life approach to every day of her life, we’ve even decided to use a “larger-than-life” thumbnail. Yeah, we know: We’re wacky that way. … Remember being young and crazy? It’s a wonder any of us lived, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Video, Exclusive Video]
11/23/10	Think about “Soft Places for a Hard Drive” and just try to keep your mind out of the gutter. On the other hand, if you happen to enjoy a little gutter-thought now and again, this would be a fine place to hang out. In fact the ever-astounding and beautiful Julia Ann will probably keep you from noticing all the geek talk entirely. She’s handy that way. [FEATURED TAGS: Julia Ann, Danni Ashe, Justine Joli Video]
11/19/10	Ah, to recall the halcyon days of college. It comes as little surprise, perhaps, that people with the financial wherewithal (or the cajones to borrow even more money) often choose to continue the event. So why does no one tell us that Graduate School (note the capitalization there) bears little actual relationship to the generally festive frivolity of an undergraduate collegiate experience? In case you happen to be curious, we have figured it out for you: Because That’s how They get ya! … On the upside, folks in Graduate School do have rather varied schedules, and so when such Talented Temps (again with the capitalization) get a chance to hang for another stint at our humble offices, we welcome them we open arms (although not so much “wallets” as a rule). We also tend to let them use whatever Illustration Techniques they’d like to employ, and if some such person wants to show off a variation of a Flash Video Approach and play with Justine Joli in the process, well, gosh, why would we complain? (And, yes, These Types sometimes Capitalize Too Much. Whatever.) [FEATURED TAGS: Justine Joli, Monica Mayhem Video, Capri Anderson Video]
11/14/10	Rumor has it that Joe Montana (Hall of Fame NFL Quarterback, if you’ve been living under a decidedly unathletic rock somewhere) once said that any talk of “Genius” doesn’t belong in the same conversation with football. According to this source (which was the radio, so it’s gotta be true) Joe actually said, “If you’re going to be talking Geniuses, you need to be talking about that Norman Einstein guy.” … Just so we’re clear here: Joe was making a joke. Not all football players need help spelling the name of their college entrance exam test. … Still, some people claim not to care anything at all about football, so we’re giving them Cytherea today. Technically she’s giving herself to us, but honestly that sounds like a whole lot more fun than what’s actually happening. It’s complicated. Y’all enjoy Cy. We’re all going to go in search of that really bright Norman fellow. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Justine Joli]
11/10/10	Christopher Moore has once again given us a wonderful turn of phrase to use around the office. Has anyone else ever felt like an old piece of Bubblicious with all the licious chewed out of it? Well, writing computer code all day (and many nights) long can certainly do that to a person, but when some of your “duties” involve working with Inari Vachs, she being rather more of the Babelicious bent, well, you learn to put up with a few things. It’s a long road, but nobody said it has to be a miserable one. … OK. So some Gandhi dude said something like that, but he was clearly not talking about Inari. [FEATURED TAGS:Inari Vachs]
11/5/10	Now even admitting that you might pay attention to the tabloids, or Heaven Forbid, Tabloid Television, almost certainly violates the Fifth Amendment of the U.S. Constitution. That said, we do have friends that have been known to “appear” in/on those darned things, so we can’t just ignore them. Consequently, we dutifully continue the “What We Can Tell You So Far” part of the Capri Anderson story from inside this part of her life, and then transition much more happily into Stormy Daniels (sadly, not “as it were” in this case). It makes for a rousing good day despite the ominous beginnings. Have you ever been with someone that picks up one of those tacky “newspapers” at the grocery store checkout line? Next time that happens, just say really loudly, “Aw, Geez! Can’t we just go buy porn or something? This is really embarrassing.” History tells us they will put that reading material back on the rack immediately. You might want to hurry on out of the store while they’re paying, however. [FEATURED TAGS: Capri Anderson, Tenaya, Stormy Daniels Video, Shyla Stylez Video]
11/2/10	Oh, thank the Heavens that the excruciating barrage of political ads will finally end after today. Now we do want to pass along our traditional We don’t care for whom you vote, but it remains important that you do so! message, and thus we have done that – with some degree of elegance actually. In celebration we have a bit of our (also traditional) humorous look at some decidedly not political ads, and then we ever-so-subtly remind you that you should keep up with Cytherea on her site too. She had a new post go up yesterday. Did you know that? … As for the political commercials, according to Lon we have at least a couple of months before everyone starts talking about the 2012 elections. That Lon, he’s an eternal optimist. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea]

Stars:Capri Anderson| Cytherea| Danni Ashe| Dee| Inari Vachs| Julia Ann| Justine Joli| Kristal Summers| Monica Mayhem| Shayla LaVeaux| Shyla Stylez| Stormy Daniels| Tenaya

Year:2010

January 2008 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

1/31/08	Somehow we got all serious today, at least for a good part of D.Minion’s industry report. Still a great deal more than "fun and games" goes along with being in the XXX Industry (and a good many fewer orgies than people think if you want to know the truth). It doesn’t hurt any of us to at least consider some of the Bigger Pictures every once in awhile – particularly when you can just click the little camera icon at the top of the page and skip to the "smaller" pictures – happily involving gratuitous nudity. We have a t-shirt pinned to the bulletin board in the office that says, "Everyone should believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer." … Insightful perhaps. [FEATURED TAGS: KSEX Radio, Dee, Alana Evans, D.Minion]
1/27/08	We said all of that last post so we can tell you all of this today. Per a significant number of (at least potentially misguided) requests, we’re trying a brand new approach to Dee-Land this time around. We’ll let you know if it works and people are happy, obviously. And if you think about it, if you have Dee as Preface, Content, and Conclusion, how bad can it be really? [FEATURED TAGS: Dee Cam Show, Exclusive Video]
1/25/08	Apparently we’ve been slacking off on bringing Dee’s KSEX Index up to date with all of the missing days from her tenure there. And apparently some people have noticed, because we’re getting emails about this oversight. … Well, coincidentally we were working on a rather large NEW approach to Dee’s Diary and decided to fill in for a brief bit here with some of those requested posts. For what it’s worth, we’ve long been of the opinion that there’s no such thing as too much Dee – particularly if Dee happens to be naked. She’s wonderful otherwise too, but naked saves on laundry. And we care about the environment — particularly around the office. [FEATURED TAGS: KSEX Radio, Dee, D.Minion]
1/23/08	We suppose we had to start somewhere in our daunting task of covering this year’s Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas. Consequently a "Best of" stills collection from Maverick, along with his "Convention Floor" video contribution seemed a nice, gentle way to begin. He’s also provided some of the "autographs" that he collected, which presumably (and hopefully) he’ll explain a bit more when he launches the 247AdultStars.com site within the risqué family. Last we heard he was "working frantically" on that task, but one can never really be sure what "frantic" means in the UK we’ve learned over the years. [FEATURED TAGS: Adult Entertainment Expo, Exclusive Video, Maverick]
1/20/08	Upon the internal review of today’s contribution we actually had an unusual bit of disagreement among a couple of the troops. D.Minion wanted an explanation "elaboration" while Maverick held firm in the opinion that, "Hey. It’s just another story in the life of risqué." … As for what we all eventually decided, well, we can’t really get into that here. There are a couple of football games going on today, and we plan on grilling out and thanking our stars that we live in Southern California and not in either Boston or Green Bay. Brrrr. [FEATURED TAGS: Sasha Grey]
1/16/08	Well we survived again and we’re all back and kicking. OK. So most of us are not kicking like the Rockettes exactly, more like Charlie Brown if you want to know the truth. Still, we managed yet another round of kissing, hugging, over-eating, and laughing amidst enough exposed flesh to cause sensory overload – even without the whole "being in Las Vegas" part. As is our custom – and since we’re very old it’s perfectly acceptable to have a "custom" by the way – we’re not going to simply bury you with everything at once. Over some time you’ll get a true feeling of at least our perspective on The State of The Industry, but we need to start somewhere …. So we decided to start later and today show you a truly ambitious scene from Couch Tomato Isabella instead. Hey, the last thing you want to do after taking 10,000 photos and 100 hours of video footage is actually look at it. [FEATURED TAGS: Isabella Video, Exclusive Video, Maverick]
1/8/08	As a technical matter we’re putting up tomorrow’s post today, since tomorrow we leave for Las Vegas for a week to attend the Adult Entertainment Expo (and the Consumer Electronics Show). Of course, when we actually leave it will be today, even though this will have gone up yesterday. Still, it’s a lot better than putting up today for day before yesterday, or even last week, as sometimes happens depending upon the goings on around these parts. If you think about it, why would we put off until tomorrow what we can do today anyway? And yesterday all our troubles seemed so far away – at least the way we remember it from years ago. … Oh, it’s Day Two on the set of Sophia with D.Minion’s usual bizarre observations and many, many pictures, by the way. But that seems sort of beside the point now, considering all of this. … Maybe it’s best if we stop thinking now. [FEATURED TAGS: Sophia Lynn, Renna Ryann, Moxxie Maddron, Sabrina Rose, D.Minion]
1/5/08	Well, we have to confess that somehow D.Minion snuck in some more pictures of ladders, in additon to a shot she swears is snow falling in Las Vegas. (You can decide on that one.) But she also managed to shoot over 200 pictures of scantily-clad women as she finished up AEE 2007 for your scientific analysis. Of course she also captured Kristal Summers in basically no clothing for an impromptu hotel room dalliance, so that’s always good. Basically, it’s always good to see how people change (or don’t) after a mere year in the business. We’ve always said that it’s an odd planet that we live on, this one called the XXX Business in Los Angeles. [FEATURED TAGS: Adult Entertainment Expo, Kristal Summers, Dee, Julia Ann, Justine Joli, Audrey Hollander, Heather Vuur, Heather Vandeven, Monica Mayhem, Faith Leon, Isabella Video, Exclusive Video, D.Minion, Maverick]
1/1/08	It’s a rebirth! It’s a revision! It’s a revolutionary enterprise! … Or else it’s a moderately interesting new approach. … We always get those confused. We do know it’s a New Year, and we’re going forward with our usual philosophy: How bad can it be? [FEATURED TAGS: Adult Entertainment Expo, Exclusive Video, D.Minion]

Stars:Alana Evans| Audrey Hollander| Dee| Faith Leon| Heather Vandeven| Heather Vuur| Isabella| Julia Ann| Justine Joli| Kristal Summers| Monica Mayhem| Moxxie Maddron| Renna Ryann| Sabrina Rose| Sasha Grey| Sophia Lynn

Year:2008

June 2007 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

6/30/07	It may seem hard to believe, but we always read and (mostly) listen to the member emails that come in. Now we can’t say we always follow the “advice” since some of the “suggestions” seem to be physically impossible, but some of them are actually nice, and those we tend to pay attention to. We also like giving friends a semi-public chance to “vent” when life has given them lemons … or marshmellow bunnies, or something … and so we’re able to accomplish two goals very early in the process today. We get to see a lot of “Dee Behind the Scenes” changing clothes and generally being adorable and we get to learn some history that involves many, many naked women. All in all, with this much accomplished before nine o’clock in the morning, we’d better go spend some quality time with the dogs. Y’all have a good time, and feel free to eat some chocolate waffles this weekend. Live a litte. [FEATURED TAGS: Dee, Georgia Video, Justine Joli Video, Michael Ninn, D.Minion, Risque News Insight]
6/26/07	Details remain sketchy at this point, but it appears that D.Minion and Lon had a meaningful experience with Julia Ann over the weekend – which happened to include the use of a bed. We decided that while we’re uncovering (as it were) more details, today might just be a good day to recount some Julia Ann experiences with our old friend Inari Vachs. Apparently Julia Ann has developed some experience dealing with Naughty Amateurs – which would undoubtedly include both Lon and D.Minion, by the way. [FEATURED TAGS: Julia Ann, Inari Vachs, D.Minion, Risque News Insight]
6/17/07	We’re off to a geek convention so that we might learn new and improved ways to be confused in our everyday efforts, and then we’re staying down for the Erotica LA Convention next Weekend. Now as we understand it, one should make a practice of being kind to strangers, and so that’s what we’re doing in this particular mega-venture to entertain you in our absence. While Maverick doesn’t qualify as someone we don’t know obviously, we can assure you with absolute certainty that he is indeed stranger than most people you’ll ever meet. Lamenting his failure to arrange a visit to correspond with our upcoming parade with porn stars, he … let’s say, unhappily … pointed out that we never made time to publish his … let’s say unique … adventures at the AEE last January. So we’ve made the (considerable) effort to do that. Without providing too much editorial comment at this early juncture, let us just point out that you could read 1,000 words and look at 100 pictures on each of the seven days covering our little trip here, and you’d still have four more pictures to go – along with Heaven knows how many words. Culture is a curious thing; add it to the XXX world, and you’ve got an interesting animal to say the least. [FEATURED TAGS: Adult Entertainment Expo, Kristal Summers, Jenna Jameson, Julia Ann, Heather Vuur, Heather Vandeven, Kylie Ireland, Justine Joli, Chasey Lain, Sunny Lane, Jesse Jane, Stephanie Swift, Jana Cova, Belladonna, Monique Alexander, Christy Canyon, Alana Evans, Jenna Haze, Alexandra Silk, Aurora Snow, Mika Tan, Monica Mayhem, Audrey Hollander, Faith Leon, Taren Steele Video, Sindee Coxx Video, Michael Ninn, Maverick]
6/14/07	You know what’s good about Mia Smiles? Well, darned near everything if you want to know the truth. So when Mia stepped in as wardrobe mistress, and cell phone aficionado, and talent to work with Katsumi, we decided we’d hang out and see if anything interesting happened. It seemed to oddly enough. Go figure. We love that about life. [FEATURED TAGS: Katsumi, Mia Smiles, Trinity, Monica Sweetheart, Penny Flame, Exclusive Video, Michael Ninn, D.Minion]
6/9/07	We’re reveling in technology today, which fortunately we’re making with a great deal of Juli Ashton and even more gratuitous nudity. And if you think about it, any day where you can say that seems like a pretty good day all the way around. Consider it technically Juli as a Diva and effectively as Juli just being dazzling. It’s good in life not to overcomplicate. [FEATURED TAGS: Juli Ashton Video, Exclusive Video, Michael Ninn]
6/6/07	In keeping with our basically weird existence we have a special report today that’s a “Lala” shoot that doesn’t actually happen in LA. We know: It sounds confusing. And if you think that’s bad, just wait until you get to the European Geography part. Uh-Huh. Now we’ve said this before, but you really might consider just skipping to the 100+ pictures of the beautiful naked woman. Either that, or you’re gonna need a map, and you really have to be careful about paper cuts … at least on some parts of your person … that may be rather exposed while you’re looking … or maybe not. We’ll just move along now. [FEATURED TAGS: Lala X, Maverick]
6/2/07	Favorite shirt we saw at the rodeo this weekend: “Sure beer has no food value but food has no beer value either.” … OK. We didn’t really go to the rodeo this weekend, but there’s one in town and this guy wearing a cowboy hat had that shirt on, so we figure it’s a fair assumption that the shirt ended up at the rodeo too. We make leaps of faith like that, and you’ll likely notice a few more of them as we conclude Becoming Georgia Adair: Self Portrait with Day Two of D.Minion’s traditional epic. Be warned: There was a kitty cat on set and if you’ve been a member for awhile, you know what that means. [FEATURED TAGS: Georgia Adair, Sharon Wild, Michael Ninn, D.Minion, Risque News Insight]

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