Filed Under: Jassie

July 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

7/31/11

We could call this something philosophical today – like “Net Benefit” – but that would imply way too much economic thought when considering Maverick’s forays into the summertime debauchery that many, many beers in London can bring if you hang out with porn stars. Come to think of it, we should have learned after all these years not to even try to qualify Maverick with mere words. Pictures are better, and some of the videos aren’t even hopelessly dark. Bonus! [FEATURED TAGS: Sophie O’Brien Exclusive Video, Kimmy Haze, Tanya Cox Exclusive Video, Valentina Cruz Exclusive Video, Tracey Lain, Faye Rampton Exclusive Video, Syren Sexton Video, 247AdultStars.com] 

Definitely NOT Maverick
7/27/11

So most adult web sites probably don’t mention either Eugene O’Neill or Michael Landon in their typical discourse, and they certainly don’t weave them into the same conversation we’re guessing. That said, we’ve never made any claims to be on even the same planet as typical in this world, and we do talk about Nikki Kane enough that you can just ignore the old dead guys. That would certainly be cheerier. [FEATURED TAGS: Nikki Kane, Michael Ninn]

A Kane That's Certainly Able ... (We have no shame.)
7/22/11

Many types of people end up in the “adult business” although many of them seem quite unwilling to accept it, or at least acknowledge it publicly. A quick trip through the latest “Novelty” convention has highlighted this little fact that we seem to forget, while Shayla choosing an outfit in which to attend a small-town produce “Festival” seems to demonstrate how seamlessly we adapt to the “regular” world. Overall, we seem to have an easier time with them than they do with us. You’d think they’d take lessons, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux] 

Prepare to be Dazzled
7/16/11

You just know you’ve made it as a major society in the History of the World when road construction in one of your major cities makes the international news. Either that, or you know it has been an amazingly slow news day. Well, you’ve got a much less painful option to consider over the weekend, and you won’t even have to think about “Carmageddon” in LA at all. The CyCAM makes its episodic debut today, and while potentially as noteworthy as shutting down the major North/South interstate in Los Angeles, it probably won’t make the television news anywhere. Pity, that. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video] 

Cytherea's Favorite Appliance
7/14/11

Possibilities abound in this business in general, and unique potential multiplies geometrically around the risque communes. For example, sometimes the people that came up with the plan for a post don’t happen to be around when the time comes for other people to actually do the work. And sometimes that can be just a tad confusing. On the upside, this particular confusion involves Wendy Divine, Shayla LaVeaux, Aurora Snow, and Jenna Haze all in various states of nakedness. Come to think of it, we could more accurately have described “all of the various states” as completely. That would have worked too. See how confused we get? [FEATURED TAGS: Erotica Los Angeles 2004, Julia Ann, Mika Tan, Nina Hartley, Brittney Skye, Wendy Divine, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Jenna Haze Video, Aurora Snow Video, Michael Ninn]

Shayla LaVeaux and Julia Ann - Breasts of Friends, Obviously
7/10/11

As the temperatures rise across the country, getting wet seems like a wonderful idea a great deal of the time. Of course when you consider the juxtaposition of Cytherea and “wet” in a single sentence, the relevance of the outside temperature doesn’t really matter all that much. Now if with this introduction you might be forming an opinion as to Cytherea being a meteorologist of some sort, well, you clearly don’t know Cytherea all that well. Take heart (or whatever) in hand, though, for today you may learn much more about her. She loves D.Minion, you know. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Exclusive Video, Michael Ninn]

The Writing's on the Wall
7/8/11

Some of us consider our civic duty as males to play the chivalrous role, offering strength, comfort, guidance, and support to any lass potentially in a less than favorable situation. The fact that Uncle Gibby just happened to find himself called into action at a strip club where Bree Olson was headlining, well, that’s just a coincidence. He’s a dedicated lad, that Gibby. Rumor has it he’s also thinking of changing his name to “Jimmy” but you’ll have to follow along inside to understand his rationale. [FEATURED TAGS: Bree Olson Video]

Polaroids?! Wow! ... How Retro.
7/4/11

We attended a workshop at a conference once where the speaker began his talk by saying, “We only walk by continually beginning to fall forward.” While we can’t really speak to the relevance for that specific workshop to what followed in our professional careers, since none of us can even remember which one it was – or even what city we were in when we heard it – we have employed the sentiment on occasion. For example, we can see how the theory applies to the freedoms celebrated in America on July 4th, even if many of us face $2,000 fines should we seek to create our own Rocket’s Red Glare instead of simply enjoying those of the government-sponsored variety. Perhaps most of all, however, Freedom (with a capital “F” don’t you know) allows us to voice introspection and illustrate our points with beautiful naked women. All in all that does seem safer than potentially blowing off your hand or burning the town down. [FEATURED TAGS: Anais, Shayla LaVeaux, Jassie, Marie Luv, Daisy Marie, Faith Leon, Kimberly Kane, Adriana Sage, Britney Manson, Emily Marilyn, Michael Ninn]

Seeking Anais: An Excellent Use of Freedom
7/1/11

Everybody should pop on over to JuliaAnn.com and say hello. You should also probably join Julia’s site so you can see all the cool stuff. If you decide upon this course of action, however, you should probably be aware that there might be nudity there, and even possibly representations of sex out of wedlock. Then again if moral issues seem to be a stumbling block for you, what the heck are you doing here anyway? … So how’d we do Julia? Subtle enough? [FEATURED TAGS: Julia Ann Video]

Reading Can Be Educational

April 2011 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

4/30/11

So apparently they had this big wedding yesterday, and insane people over here stayed up until all hours of the morning just to watch it on TV? Well, we can’t say that this makes any sense to us California folks, but then we’ve heard the same thing said about us from other parts of the country. Did you ever embrace a reflective moment and think about just how you ended up where you did in your life? Presumably people in prison do this with some regularity, but fortunately today we’re not talking about weddings or incarceration – either of these sad situations. Today we sit down with Shayla and consider the “Origins of Porn Woman” and be honestly thrilled that the entire world doesn’t watch everything we do. Seriously. That sounds icky, right? [FEATURED TAGS: Alexis DeVell, AEE 2011, Shayla LaVeaux, Julia Ann, Cheyenne Silver, Inari Vachs, Tori Black, Tanya Tate, Phoenix Marie, Bobbi Starr, Andy San Dimas, Jesse Jane, Shy Love, Selena Rose, Natasha Nice, Kayden Kross, Jessica Drake, Riley Steele, Dana DeArmond, Bree Olsen, Prinzzess, Lupe Fuentes, Joanna Angel, Anna Lovato, Jynx Maze, Kristen Rose, Lexi Belle, Breanne Benson, Nina Hartley, Monique Alexander, Stoya, Andy San Dimas, Exclusive Video, 247AdultStars.com

The DeVell Made Us Do It
4/28/11

You know what colloquialisms are we assume? OK. So most of us have at least heard the word, and we probably have some vague idea of the meaning, although that may or may not be true. After all, it’s not like you have occasion to throw that particular English language tidbit into a conversation every day. And if you have one thing, like a colloquialism, for example, don’t sound principles of physics dictate that its direct opposite be possible too? So what’s the opposite of a colloquialism? … If you’re confused, you’ve now perfectly prepared yourself to match our condition today, so all you Members can now feel free to enter. On the upside, we do have Renee Perez playing in the shower this time around, and basically that’s not very confusing at all. [FEATURED TAGS: Renee Perez Video, Michael Ninn]

Renee Perez, Disconcerting, but not Confusing
4/22/11

There are many, many ways to say Happy Birthday across the globe, yet all of them mean, “Gosh, you’re even older than you were yesterday.” As our friends get older, we have noticed a tendency to buy them gifts that we hope to get back in inheritance, though, but that’s OK, right? We should be practical after all. Also, we’re going to stop writing now so that El Jefe doesn’t have enough clues to figure out which of us wrote this introduction. Practical … [FEATURED TAGS: Tanya Cox, “The Snatch Game” ]

Tanya a la Mav - Good Dessert When You Can Get It
4/21/11

Just in case you’re ever curious, you should know that the only people that ever win in a lawsuit are the lawyers. Legal fights beat you up financially, emotionally, and depending upon how long they drag on, even spiritually. They’re not fun. Sadly, however, they are sometimes necessary. As we understand it, you’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything. All in all, the only thing you really learn from lawsuits boils down to an addition to your list of people with whom you never want to have to see ever again in your life. Sometimes the lawyers don’t end up being first on that list, but they always make the list for sure. Even for attorneys, though, all good things must come to an end, and eventually even the most acrimonious of disputes reaches some form of resolution. Today would be such a day. … Whew. [FEATURED TAGS: Vicca, Nikita, Juli Ashton, Felecia, Anna Malle, Asia Carrera, Ron Jeremy, Ninn Video, Michael Ninn]

Nikita in an Act of Little Dispute
4/18/19

Most of us would agree that only a few things in life can annoy us as much as paying taxes. We all see the need for them in the abstract, and quite honestly see the value in government services and the philanthropic concepts of helping those less fortunate than ourselves. When theory crashes into personal reality, however, you can almost hear a universal whining. If you don’t believe that just listen to the richest 10% of the people in the country bellow and start talking about the President’s citizenship every time he dares suggest they should probably try to contribute a little more to help the country get out of its economic mess – that he didn’t create, by the way, but let’s not get too bogged down in politics. … In that non-political spirit we’re dishing up our own risque brand of tax relief today. We’d be willing to bet that if you love it or hate it, you’re decision will have nothing whatsoever to with your party affiliation. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea, Lylith LaVey]

Cytherea Demonstrating that Some Jobs are Better Than Others
4/15/11

Does anyone else wonder why today doesn’t qualify as Tax Day, even though it’s a Friday and not a weekend? Nope. We didn’t either. We just said, “Whoopie! We get extra time this year!” … Of course none of us really need the extra time because we always do our taxes in January so we don’t even have to worry about it anymore. Yep. That’s our story, and we’re stickin’ to it. … You’ll find other words (and pictures) of wisdom in A Dawning today as well. What an excellent Friday. [FEATURED TAGS: Audrey Hollander, Heather Vuur, Heather Vandeven, Jassie, Shayla LaVeaux Video, Michael Ninn]

Jassie - Containing her Glee
4/12/11

We would love to say that we spend hours and hours thinking up clever titles for our ever-so-insightful commentary on the risque commune sites, but that wouldn’t technically be true. Generally someone just pops off with something, the others laugh, and that’s what we go with. Sometimes, though, a couple of very good ideas get thrown into the mix, and then we have a debate, granted about the silliest of things. (That’s what Americans do, as any analysis of professional sports or politics will clearly illustrate.) Today we had “Sheen without Luster” as well as “Sheen and Lust Her” as options that we just couldn’t reach consensus on. D.Minion said she’d decide, since it was her story, after all. … Naturally D.Minion picked a third title. … It’s good to be Queen. We’re not so sure about being a Goddess, however.  [FEATURED TAGS: Capri Anderson, Bree Olsen Video]

Capri Anderson: A Goddess Spurned
4/6/11

Back before he started making sausage, Jimmy Dean recorded a song with a chorus that began, “I won’t go huntin’ with you, Jake, but I’ll go chasin’ women.” Most of you will probably be glad to hear that this does not happen to be the song in which you can find Shayla naked in the music video. That said, as between early 1950’s country music – Ice T’s “Body Count” – and sausage, we can’t honestly say which we’d like to see made less. Shayla dancing naked is always good, however. [FEATURED TAGS: Justine Joli]

It's Art. Honest.
4/3/11

Last night we learned the Butler did it, if UConn believe that. … And if you don’t follow college basketball, or if you happen to be reading this years from now, that will make no sense at all. Fortunately, sexy women do tend toward the timeless and universally understood, so don’t worry yourself too much about the “strangest of the strange” around here. Both Shayla LaVeaux and Cheyenne Silver give reports today on the most recent AEE, and 247AdultStars chimes in with “visitors” Lon and D.Minion as well. All it all it’s very confusing. So go slowly and remember to breathe. Ice cream might help too. … And for all you authors that hurried your reports in because we were going to publish this a couple of days ago … um … April Fool’s. (Hey we couldn’t have used the amazingly clever and hysterical Butler/UConn comment on April 1st. See? Things tend to work out.) [FEATURED TAGS: AEE 2011, Shayla LaVeaux, Cheyenne Silver, Cytherea, Katsuni, Prinzzess, Alektra Blue, Syren, Exclusive Video]

Cheyenne Silver & Prinzzess - Fools be They NOT

December 2010 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

12/31/10

At this point we’ve pretty much given up on Business as Usual around here, as everyone has pretty much fallen into the Full Panic mode about the upcoming convention. When we decided to put that Countdown for Gibby on top of New Stuff, we didn’t really anticipate that this would result in common wails of AAAARGH! in the office – every time somebody here opens up the site to check something. Presuming we haven’t been overrun by a collection of pirates, one might assume that the old “Ignorance is Bliss” theory definitely seems to hold water in this establishment. Of course, since we’re almost always happy here, that should give us reason to worry, right? … We’ll think about that, and y’all enjoy Bullet Points from DM. [FEATURED TAGS: AEE 2010, Rayveness, Nicki Hunter, Christy Canyon, Raylene, Ginger Lynn, Veronica Hart, Jessica Drake, Monique Alexander, Eva Angelina, Julia Ann, Sasha Grey, Jesse Jane, Nina Hartley, Chloe, Sunset Thomas, Exclusive Video]

Get Real. Really?
12/27/10

You know how it feels when you get the opportunity to hang out with a friend that you’ve had for going on 20 years? Well, that’s how we’ve been enjoying for the past few months as we’ve all been showing off what we can do for just such a friend, Shayla LaVeaux. Today happens to be Shayla’s birthday, and today also happens to mark the launch of Shayla’s brand new personal web site. Members here get that access for FREE, and all of Shayla’s members will also get to hang with the rest of us for the same price. We’ve had a saying around here that we’ve used for years: “Things tend to work out.” … Happy Birthday, pretty lady. We love you. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux]

Shayla Preparing to Reveal – An Excellent Day
12/25/10

Sometimes simple works best: Merry Christmas. [FEATURED TAGS: Merry Christmas!]

Appropriate Christmas Ornaments
12/24/10

Don’t you just love presents? In the long list of quirks resulting in social deficiency that we possess around here, not being Politically Correct doesn’t even make the Top 40 list in all probability. Consequently, we feel quite comfortable just saying “Have a Holly, Jolly Christmas” and offering up another collection of gifts that you really shouldn’t share in just your basic family gathering. On the other hand, it does make us feel quite good to be able to offer this to the Members, and if that makes us odd, well, we weird people need love too. [FEATURED TAGS: Justine Joli, Anais, Georgia Adair, Jana Cova, Angel Cassidy, Charlie Lane, Jassie, Moni Michaels, Melissa Lauren, Audrey Hollander, Brittney Skye, Marie Luv, Daisy Marie, Heather Vuur, Heather Vandeven, Rita Faltoyano, Michael Ninn]

Nice Things to find Under Your Tree
12/22/10

It’s … a Poetry, Nudity, Gala (Oh, My!) … And for what it’s worth, we’ve never heard tell of Cytherea actually appearing in a home having magically come down the chimney, but we can assure you that she’d be welcome most anywhere we suspect. At the very least she provides a lot of decorative value to the area, regardless of the season. And while we make no claim to Shakespearean aspirations around here, we can do a dandy bit with the Limerick. If you have the time to wander through, you might even enjoy the poetic license. If you just have time to gaze at Cytherea, you’ll definitely enjoy her license to thrill. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea]

What Santa Wishes for at the Bottom of the Chimney
12/20/10

Did you know that even porn stars can get jealous when “their” man participates in a scene? Well, strange as it may seem normal human emotions don’t completely abandon a woman just because she’s decided on this rather atypical career choice. On the other hand, even in the presence of these feelings the guy usually gets to escape with all his limbs intact – even if not so much his breath. … If any of you folks out there ever find yourself in this unusual situation, take some advice from someone who’s seen it a lot: Walk away clean, and whatever you do, don’t brag too much. Shayla LaVeaux, Olivia Del Rio, and Anthony demonstrate a point (or two) this time around. That’s handy. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux, Olivia Del Rio]

Olivia, of the River and the Angels
12/17/10

If you live long enough, you’ll get an opportunity to use the word “redact” in a sentence. Actually, if you happen to work for one of the various “critical” agencies for the U.S. Government, you’ll probably get to use that word all the time — generally in response to the bellows of all those pesky But The First Amendment is Important! people. On the upside, we use bellows a whole lot more than we use gallows these days, so that seems like progress. [FEATURED TAGS: Sunny Lane, Kimberly Kane, Evan Stone, Erica McLean, Kaz B. Exclusive Video, 247adultstars.com]

We Wonder as She Wonders ... Festive, Aren't We?
12/13/10

Think about “C’mon Baby Light My Fire” … And if you know anything at all about Cytherea’s “speciality” in her adult performances, you know that if she did in fact light your fire, she could at least put it out all by herself. If you don’t happen to know what we’re talking about with Cytherea, well, you certainly will after a careful perusal of today’s video example. If you don’t understand “C’mon Baby Light My Fire” at all, just check YouTube. You’ll figure it out. And once reaching the video clips, if you wonder why someone in our Video Department went to all the trouble to create the complicated blueprint graphics as the background for the little introductions, we can explain that easily here too. Upon questioning we learned that this resulted from the simple fact that “Cytherea wrote the blueprints on this type of scene.” In addition to Web Geeks, Video Dudes also think they’re funny. … On the upside, you’ll even understand the Classic 60’s song reference at the end of DM’s story too. It’s fun around here. [FEATURED TAGS: Cytherea Video, Taylor Hayes Video]

Fire in the Hole
12/10/10

Have you ever had a party with a bunch of porn stars and all of the sudden they all decided to pile on each other and pose for naked pictures? … OK. So probably not, but there are a great many worse ways to spend an evening in life. So we decided to look at a life of one of those stars today, and then illustrate her adorned with Devinn Lane, Kristal Summers, Dee, and Wendy Divine. That’s a heck of a good way to be adorned, just so you know. [FEATURED TAGS:Kristal Summers, Dee, Wendy Divine, Devinn Lane, Jessica Drake, Cheyenne Silver]

Party with the Porn Stars
12/7/10

The more philosophically positive around here try to remember today for a different reason than history aficionados. Today, of course, happens to be Chasey Lain’s birthday. Naturally we have always wished the best for Chasey, and she’s (by all accounts, including her own) doing well. She’s actually talking about learning some web design techniques, which would make her a certainly entertaining person around the office. Consequently we’re doing some celebration of our own around here today, and giving a public vote of confidence for another lass that has had career hiccups – albeit those being of a substantially less physically risky than Chasey’s past. As D.Minion says, “We just want everyone to be happy.” [FEATURED TAGS: Capri Anderson, Chasey Lane Video, Isabella Video, Daisy Marie Video]

Happy Birthday Chasey
12/2/10

Each of us brings a unique perspective to life, well, unless you happen to be one of those lacky “Dear God, Don’t Let Me Lose My Job” types in Washington, D.C. of course. Of course gradations of “unique” come into play, and both D.Minion and Sunny Lane certainly represent Whos of Different Hues if you want to look at it that way. Put them both in a Las Vegas hotel room, and you can imagine where the conversation (to say the least) will go. Since we’ve now started serious planning for the upcoming Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas, this little soirée seemed the perfect beginning. One thing about Vegas with a boatload of porn stars, you can find soirées out the ying-yang. … There’s another title in there somewhere. [FEATURED TAGS: Sunny Lane Exclusive Video, Alexis Texas Exclusive Video, Veronica Hart]

Sunny in Full Soiree

November 2007 Risque | What’s New

… With appropriate credit to Garth:

Back when the Old Stuff was New Stuff

11/30/07

There has been a very long debate over the difference between Art and Pornography, and in our little world perhaps the best explanation we’ve ever heard came from Gloria Leonard quoting someone (she sort of forgot to mention exactly whom, as we recall) that “The difference between art and pornography is the lighting.” … Well, politics aside, that works for us, although some would probably consider us not the best barometer of the topic, since we clearly have no problem with either. … With that in mind, then we’ll offer up some of the new talent around the office here and their “artistic” interpretations of the female nude. And since the female happens to be Shayla LaVeaux we certainly have no problem with that either. Basically, it just seems like there are enough problems in life, and you shouldn’t have to go out of your way to find some more. [FEATURED TAGS: Shayla LaVeaux]

Shayla and the Art of a Beautiful Woman
11/25/07

We apparently have some A.J. Bailey fans hanging around here, or perhaps they just really, really like libraries. Whatever the case they set us upon a trail to find a bit more … um … interactive exercise from the budding archival scientist. What with the odd inclination of some people NOT to watch American football on television, or better yet attend a game personally, it seemed like a pleasant diversion featuring A.J. and Hillary Scott might be a bit more up their alley – so to speak. Modern libraries probably have a lesbian section, right? [FEATURED TAGS: A.J. Bailey, Hillary Scott]

Study group that would encourage more studying.
11/22/07

So we had to go to Arizona to get some materials on a story about London. … Hey, we keep telling you truth is stranger than fiction. … Anyway, we decided to employ a few of the images in our typically heartfelt, empathetic, and divinely warm holiday greeting. … That seemed reasonable, seeing as how the rest of the employees seem to think they deserve the day off. Instead of thinking of obtaining some foreign workers around here, though, we’ll just wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving, and blame all of the wackiness on D.Minion and Bijou being in a hurry to get to the food. To paraphrase a “Wilde” foreigner, as a matter of fact, “In matters of great importance, style and not sincerity is the vital ingredient.” [FEATURED TAGS: Devinn Lane]

A wanted poster, obviously.
11/19/07

At any time in the day (these days) you’ll almost certainly be able to find a television announcer using the preface “At the end of the day …” for whatever pithy commentary they’re trying to espouse. Now we’re not sure when this happened; we’re not sure how it happened; we’re not even sure why it happened. We do think it’s interesting that no one seems to be much interested in “the beginning of the day” anymore – which probably just underscores the over-emphasis on results and not effort in modern society, at least it seems to us. … What have they done for us lately? … Right? … Toward that goal, then, we’ve decided not to wait on our “Fearless” (although most of us around here use “Frazzled” as the acceptable “F” term) Leader to continue the hopefully fascinating look at Women in Porn. Instead, we thought we’d look at a woman in porn, she being the Maverick discovery Suzie Best. In response to questioning, Maverick did indicate that he has BTS video with Ms. Best, and then we can wax philosophical anew. Until then we’ll just appreciate Suzie at the end of the day … or at the first of the day … or pretty much anytime we figure. Besides in the final analysis, if they’re going to change the phrase to “at the end of the day” shouldn’t we then be asking, “At the end of which day?” [FEATURED TAGS: Suzie Best Video, Exclusive Video, Maverick]

Suzie Best. Cherry she is.
11/17/07

Hmm. Well we got distracted from our regularly scheduled discussion of the various types of women that decide to get into the porn business by … well … some of those types. We’ll explain more before we begin today, but we can say at the outset that Heather Vuur can be quite persuasive, and it’s not just because she happens to look wonderful naked. … OK. That probably doesn’t hurt her causes, but that’s not the only reason we tend to listen to Heather. … Probably. … Maybe. [FEATURED TAGS: A.J. Bailey, Jewel, Risque News Insight]

Not Heather, but also probably persuasive in many contexts.
11/11/07

We know you probably don’t have much time today, what with needing to get busy rooting for your favorite NFL team to either win (because you believe they can actually make it to the Super Bowl) or lose (because you’ve seen the Patriots play and you might as well line things up for next year’s draft now). Unfortunately for all of us that see the Big Picture and just wish to fold our hand for the year, all those folks that currently work for the team this year still want to have a job next year, and so they keep trying to win. … Creeps. … So we’ll appreciate a little half-time entertainment courtesy of Kristal Summers and Jassie, and we’ll lament all those people that confuse “what’s good for the team” with “what’s good for the team that still keeps paying me.” Something’s in the details, but maybe we don’t remember what correctly. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers, Jassie Video, Exclusive Video]

Jassie ... beating the heck out of your basic cheerleader.
11/7/07

You know what happens when British Citizens fall in love? Well in A Fish Called Wanda John Cleese ended up with Jamie Lee Curtis, so this probably isn’t as good as that ending – probably. Still, when British Porno Citizens fall in love you get to see a whole lot more gratuitous nudity than you can with your basic Jamie Lee movie. Now we’re not entirely certain that this explains what has happened, but it’s as good a reason as we can figure for the all out Give it our (Suzie) Best season we seem to be entering. Hey, it’s cold, mucky, and gray (or more accurately grey) in London. They need to keep themselves busy. [FEATURED TAGS: Suzie Best Video, Exclusive Video, Maverick]

Suzie could be Best at a lot of things potentially.
11/5/07

Presumably when you think of “Ghetto” the word “Fabulous” isn’t the first thing that pops into your mind. Of course, you’re likely not looking at it through the eyes of Michael Ninn, and you’re probably not adequately taking in the references to Elvis Presley and Donny Osmond. It’s another one of those weird days with D.Minion on Set, can you tell? And of course there’s the very cleverly disguised BONUS material you can uncover today, as if the 160+ pictures and unique video moments weren’t enough. … OK. It’s really not all that cleverly disguised, since it’s basically a link that says “Bonus” on it, but you still have to look for it, and that will hopefully distract you from some of the anticipated oddness. Maybe not, but hope springs eternal we hear. [FEATURED TAGS: Eva Angelina Video, Mika Tan Video, Lyla Lei, Ashley Brooks, Exclusive Video, Michael Ninn, D.Minion]

Not Eva Angelina. Not Mika Tan. But one damn fine puppy picture.
11/2/07

D.Minion has a dilemma that she needs your help with. For some reason (and this would be another one of those issues it’s best not to ask too many questions about) she almost religiously reads Diane Mott Davidson’s mystery series about a caterer in Boulder, Colorado that keeps finding herself in the middle of murder investigations. OK. So we pretty much consider these story lines credible to the same extent that we believe all of the stories in Penthouse Forum, but DM seems to like them – almost certainly because of the presence of more than a few canine characters in the tales. … Well, apparently in a recent novel, Ms. Davidson introduced a stray named “Latte” that apparently inexplicably disappeared in the following book. So if any of you have any idea how the stray happened to stray again and could let D.Minion know, she might be able to ease her psychic pain a bit. (Although don’t try making jokes about it just going out for coffee. We tried that. … About some things our fine Minion has very little sense of humor.) For our part we asked Nurse Kristal, and then she got completely out of the nurse costume during her Cam Show Video. … And then we forgot the question. Hey, it worked for us. [FEATURED TAGS: Kristal Summers Video, Exclusive Video]

Kristal Summers ready to aid. Who needs a doctor anyway?